Money cash (Photo credit: @Doug88888)
Below is a link to a sermon I preached on November 10, 2013 entitled “One or Two Masters” based on Luke 16:1-13
(Recorded by Voice Record Pro by Bej Bej Apps for iOS)
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
A school assembly speaker is gaining national attention. In Richardson, Texas a high school brought in “motivational speaker and dating expert” Justin Lookadoo to speak to the students about relationships and dating. Lookadoo traverses the country speaking to students about the ins and out, the perils and pitfalls of dating. According to his website, he is a former probation officer with a biology degree who likes to speak to students (I guess that’s all it takes to be motivational speaker).
Through his “Are You Dateable Quiz” Lookadoo gives teens a definitive answer on their status in the realm of dating. His quiz parallels with his “Dateable Rules” (read them here) some of which are textbook gender stereotypes and Christian theological distortions.
Here are a few of them:
Dateable Girl Rule 1:
Accept your girly-ness. You’re a girl. Be proud of all that means. You are soft, you are gentle, you are a woman. Don’t try to be a guy. Guys like you because you are different from them. So let your girly-ness soar.
Dateable Girl Rule 6:
Be mysterious. Dateable girls know how to shut up. They don’t monopolize the conversation. They don’t tell everyone everything about themselves. They save some for later. They listen more than they gab.
Dateable Girl Rule 9:
Let him lead. God made guys as leaders. Dateable girls get that and let him do guy things, get a door, open a ketchup bottle. They relax and let guys be guys. Which means they don’t ask him out!!!
Dateable Boy Rule 1:
Being a guy is good. Dateable guys know they aren’t as sensitive as girls and that’s okay. They know they are stronger, more dangerous, and more adventurous and that’s okay. Dateable guys are real men who aren’t afraid to be guys.
As you can imagine many parents had concerns about this particular speaker especially when they did not know about it or consent. Parents contacted the school and took to social media to spread the word about the assembly.
While reports have come out stating that the speaker did not speak about his religious beliefs, he did speak about the ins and outs of relationships.
To be honest, I think his “rules” are bogus. They come from a place where boys and girls are divided into classes and in the end boys win. Making girls out to be “damsels in distress” and boys are “heroic warriors looking for an adventure” doesn’t equate a relationship.
Relationships are built upon respect and mutuality not antiquated thinking when it comes to gender roles.
This particularly hits home for me when it comes to Girl Rule #9.
Picture this… a 16 year old husky, acne prone, tuba player who has a crush on a cute blonde haired girl he has been friends with for a while. While he is extroverted with his friends he can’t seem to articulate the words to ask out this girl. Then one glorious day, this girl breaks rule #9 and ask him out to the movies! (I know Justin Lookadoo is gasping…) After that they began to date and I am happy to say that I have been married to that beautiful blonde haired girl for nine years. Had my wife listened to Lookadoo’s crazy rules who knows if I would have ever have garnered enough intestinal fortitude to ask her out. If that had not happened who knows what my life would be like today.
This is not “Pleasantville” where we live in a perfect “Leave It To Beaver” style world full of “awww shucks” and Dad smoking a pipe while reading the paper. This is the 21st century where we have advanced our notion of relationships to the point where we make them “official” by updating our statuses on Facebook. Girls need not be afraid of breaking some rule or social etiquette when it comes to dating. I am sure there are hundreds if not thousands of teenage boys just like I was just hoping that a girl will ask them out. Girls, hear me, if you like someone, you my permission to break rule 9 and ask them out, sooner rather than later. You never know what might come of it.
Lookadoo’s rules interject theology that many Christians do not stand for. Again this goes back to Rule 9 which claims that God made boys to be leaders. Okay Mr. Lookadoo (I still have trouble believing that is your real last name) if this is the case then why in the Biblical record do we find women in prominent roles of leadership, authority and at the heart of the Gospel? Should girls disregard the Biblical stories that promote women in the same roles as men? Deborah the Judge– get rid of her? Queen Ester– don’t need her? Ruth– that’s just a nice story? The women who found Jesus’ tomb empty– I guess the men had “manly things” they had to take care of like hiding and running away.
Holding the view that women are just side show pieces to prop up the work of men is not found in the Biblical record… sure you can make it fit but you can do that with anything. (Also, some of the men found in the Biblical record probably wouldnt fit the bill of date-ability either.)
Girls today need to be taught that there is a God who doesn’t favor boys more than them. If we are all created in the same Image of God, created by the same Loving God and that same God knitted us in our mother’s womb, then why would having two X chromosomes disqualify someone from serving, leading, taking charge and being a strong person?
Lookadoo believes he has uncovered the secret formula for relationships… yeah you and every other author in Barnes and Nobles in the “Relationship” section.
It’s time to empower teenagers and have meaningful conversations about dating, relationships and all the craziness that comes with it.
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
Fireworks #1 (Photo credit: Camera Slayer)
My first post was on February 28, 2013 (view it here). Today is a milestone for me; this post marks the 200th post on evandolive.com. I am well aware that 200 posts in a drop in the bucket compared some other bloggers but I believe have learned a thing or two about writing and publishing.
I want to thank you for reading, sharing, liking, tweeting and commenting. It has been a wild ride so far and I look forward to the next 200!
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
The Forerunners of Christ with Saints and Martyrs, a painting by Fra Angelico, 15th century (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Below is a link to a sermon I preached entitled “Is This The Time?” based on Acts 1:6-14 for All Saint’s Sunday.
(Recorded by Voice Record Pro by Bej Bej Apps for iOS)
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
Today I did a special interview… it was with my Brother in Law, Ben Fort.
He recently started a website called EmergingDisciple.com which will serve as the canvas to which his spiritual journey will be played out. I look forward to seeing how God uses his renewed faith. You never know more videos might be coming your way. Be sure to check it out!
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
Today is my 31st birthday.
That is all.
You may return your lives now.
Thanks for reading.
Ali Knocks Out Liston
Below is a link to a sermon I preached on October 27, 2013 entitled “Your 1-2 Punch”.
(Recorded by Voice Record Pro by Bej Bej Apps for iOS)
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
Mark Driscoll, pastor of mega church Mars Hill in Seattle, Washington, is never far from controversy. Whether it is his stance on women in the ministry or the husband/wife relationship, if there is an open mic, Mark Driscoll will say something in it. Through his sermons, blog articles, books, tweets and Facebook posts Mark Driscoll shares his view of Christianity to the masses.
To be honest I have never met the guy and I have only read/heard a few things by him. What I have read/heard I have not agreed with. He and I do not see eye to eye on many things in the realm of Christianity. But, even though we have our differences, this is not what I want to focus on.
I was wasting time one day on Facebook when I saw a friend of mine had “liked” something that Driscoll had posted on Facebook (which if you haven’t ever checked his Facebook page he posts several things a day… its a lot folks). Out of curiosity I clicked on the status and began to read. I had prepared myself for an onslaught of literalism and verses out of context but rather it was a paragraph quoting one of my favorite comedians, Brian Regan. (See below)
What I find interesting about this post is that many times Driscoll has come out against yoga claiming it to have “demonic roots.” This was emphasized in the comment sections of his post. I wasn’t sure how to take it. Why would someone who dislikes the concept of yoga on religious basis promote a comedian that uses it to make money? Isn’t that like a vegetarian supporting a barbecue festival?
Then I found that he quoted Regan again…
I was amazed… Mark Driscoll and I have something in common… besides being Christians, pastors, husbands, dads and male.
Can the ground of commonality be forged on the field of comedy?
Maybe in the realm of theology and Christian practice Driscoll and I are different, but when we need to unwind and have a good laugh, Brian Regan brings us together. Maybe I have forgotten that Mark Driscoll is just like me, a fallible human being. I took away his humanity and made him into this robot of a branch of Christianity that I did not agree with. Knowing that he laughs at the same jokes I do is humbling and thought provoking all at the same time. Sometimes its hard for me fully grasp the tenet of the Disciples of Christ “freedom of belief” especially when I think someone else’s theology is harmful and misrepresents God and even the intent of the scriptures.
Sure I would love to tell him about my understanding of God, the Bible, Christ, women in ministry and the like but I doubt that will ever happen. I will continue to pursue a God who loves me despite the way I act and even think about others. Hopefully more common ground will be found but until then, enjoy the video below and laugh with Mark and I.
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
You’re invited (Photo credit: anetz)
Below is a link to a sermon I preached on October 20, 2013 entitled “You’re Invited” based on Matthew 22:1-14
(Recorded by Voice Record Pro by Bej Bej Apps for iOS)
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
It’s hard to believe that seven months ago I clicked “publish” to a letter asking a multi-million dollar corporation to stop targeting women and girls in a way that diminished their self-worth, self-pride and self-esteem. Little did I know that 3,936,266 hits (and counting) later people from across the globe would still be reading, sharing, liking and discussing it.
I want to thank you all for supporting me.
Throughout these past few months I began to think about what the next step would be, I did not want the conversation to stop with one post. I began to think about how throughout most marketing advertisements the human form or the Divine Image (Imago Dei) is distorted to a form of perfection, ideal and glamour. Sure ad campaigns use this clever device to sell products but the problem arise when these images go past the screen/page and into the minds of people as factual and true.
I am happy to announce that yesterday I have submitted a book proposal to Chalice Press.
In a nutshell, it looks at how the divine image is distorted in marketing and how God uses imperfect people to propagate the message of God while society demands perfection.
Now this does not mean that they will pick it up or anything but I am proud of the work I submitted.
Stay tuned for updates!
In Christ,
Rev. Evan
Rev. Dr. Evan M. Dolive 