2,835 thoughts on “A Letter to Victoria’s Secret From a Father”

1. I must say that I totally agree with the content of that letter. Young girls face enough challenges without being degraded into premature sex objects. I too hope Victoria’s Secret will refconsider this line.

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   • Thank you for posting this.It IS sad that women and young girls are exploded in this way. IT’s bad enough that we have to see the porn on tv, girls walking around half naked in “Victoria’s Secret” garments, but please don’t start this line with these young children undergarments. It’s not fair to them, they have to fight enough as it is. Pere pressure is enough, alone. I pray that you get a sense of Godliness about you and do the right thing where these young children are concerned.. Shame on you for even considering this.

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     • Just a FYI, Julie…it is exploiting, not exploding. I totally agree with you but, in today’s world of profits over everything, Victoria Secrets will turn a deaf ear to all else.

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   • I, too, would like to ask you to decide to change your plans regarding this line of clothing for young girls. Really? You want girls in middle school to display a message to whoever wants to read her underwear. C’mon. Stand up and be a better company than that…. please

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   • How about Rev. Evan Dolive (with his great writing) start a petition on Change.org or another such site. I’ve seen petitions geared towards Victoria Secret on there before.
     Give it a go, it sure wouldn’t hurt to try. And in today’s world, the best threat we can make is giving them a rush of bad publicity.

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2. I am a person that loves shopping at Victorias secret, but I am 23 years old. I didn’t start actually buying from VS til I was like 16 or 17 which is older compared to today. I agree with this dad, maybe their marketing direction is not for middle school aged kids, but high school and early twenties but realistically, the underwear that has all that feeling lucky and Wild words on there undies is the teen section which I see older people shopping in that section including myself but I also see younger kids shopping there as well. IF VS WAS SMART they would realize that even though their market they are targeting might not be middle school aged, that is who will be targeted as well. Simply putting words on undies is not empowering women, as so many others have said, it is putting out a sexual message which would explain why the average age people are having sex now a days is 13, 14 years old. It was not that young when I was a teen 8 or years ago, this is not just VS fault but the media’s fault as well as all these celebrities wearing scandalous clothing while little tiny boppers look up to them and dress like them, as well as people my age thinking its cool to wear almost nothing on their bodies. People need to realize younger kids look up to us and follow what we do and want to dress like we do, you can be a little revealing while still being classy about it and not look like a slut. Just saying. Movies and music also play a part in this sick perverting country we have grown into. Sorry for my rant, Just my thought. I am a VS shopper but I think even this is wrong and I agree with this dad. I know wht my dad must have been going through when I used to pickout bras and panties at VS at the age of 16.

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3. Enough’s been said around here. A applaud the parents, the mothers, the fathers, and family of girls who dont want their children to be corrupted by a convuluted and sick way of advertising, and all families with boys who trying hard to raise up men who can respect women. AMANDA, go find another job!

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4. Go Rev. Well said!

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5. I am 18 years old and I would just like to throw my opinion into the ring. When I began middle school, we as students began changing into uniforms for gym class. That is when I started caring about what my underwear looked like. When I saw other girls with padded bras and lacey underwear… of course I wanted it too. I was even made fun of for still wearing a sports bra. My mother would buy me underwear from wallmart, but I always wanted victoria’s secret underwear because it was pretty and cute. Just because I wanted lacey underwear doesn’t mean I was going to model in it for boys. I was teased because I was still wearing “granny fruit of the loom panties”. It was just embarrassing.

   I agree with what these parents are saying, victoria’s secret does promote sexy underwear and tight yoga pants with words written on the butt, but like stated before in previous posts; sex sells. VS sells sexy underwear because young girls feel like they need it.

   It wasn’t until last year when I got my first job that I started wearing VS underwear/bras. I bought it myself and their underwear is pretty much the only undergarments that I wear. They have good quality and pretty clothes that make me feel prettier when I wear them… even if no one sees them. You can’t blame me. In a world that is filled with sexy models on the cover of 17 magazine and girls sexting boys at school, you cannot blame Victoria’s Secret for selling this type of clothing.
   Boys are intrigued with sex at this age and girls want boys to be interested in them at this age, so girls will do things like snapping a shot of themselves half naked and sending it through a text message or wearing something revealing so they can get attention from boys. Girls just want attention.

   Not really sure if any of this is making a point, but this is basically what I am trying to say…

   This line of underwear will sell at Victoria’s Secret. That is why they’re selling it. Do not blame the store when any teenager can turn on the television and see half naked girls running around on MTV or look at a teen magazine with girls with unrealistic photoshopped bodies and faces. Gosh, have any of you guys seen what kind of things us teenagers have access to on the internet?
   You parents should see how boys talk at school.

   “Did you get some ass?”
   “Yeah, I’d fuck her.”
   “Check out her rack”
   “Look at this naked pic Aly sent me last night.”

   Like seriously? Are you really concerned about what it says on your daughters underwear? or are you more concerned about what boys are saying about your daughter? Maybe it’s not Victoria’s Secret… maybe it is the awful way teenage boys talk about girls my age and maybe teenage boys talk this way because they have access to all this porn! Magazines, Internet, TV. Its sick. All girl’s want is to know they’re loved and accepted and time and time again girl’s are getting pregnant at my school… Girls hear that guys like it when they show a little more than they should so they do it! Girls buy extremely huge push up bras because they want guys to stare. Our world is full of sex. And at some point your little girl will grow up and want to feel sexy… because boys really know how to make you feel like you aren’t pretty if they aren’t talking to you or about you.

   All we want is to feel pretty and underwear shouldn’t define beauty but in this generation boys, and tv, and magazines, and the internet all tell us as young women to wear sexy clothes.

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   • It seems like what you’re saying is we need less of this original author’s open letter, and more of this:

     http://www.upworthy.com/the-shortest-psa-on-how-to-handle-drunk-girls-passed-out-on-your-couch-ever

     ?

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   • You are falling for the trap.When you grow up you will learn the difference between feeling sexy and sex object. Hopefully it isn’t before you fall for sex to make you “feel sexy”. All you will feel is cheap and used.

     Rationalization is one of the WORST things to do here. A teenage boy’s mind and body will NOT GIVE A FLIP if you are in VS or Hanes or Fruit of the Loom if you put out.

     FYI, teenage girls are just as aggressive sexually as teenage boys. It is just much more acceptable for the girls to act it out now.

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     • just so you know. I have never had sex and I am saving sex for marriage and that is my own personal choice.

       and get real. its not a trap. its life. its what this generation has become of.

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     • Glad you are waiting. That is the BEST choice ANYONE can make.

       Just because a generation embraces something, it isn’t less of a trap.

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   • Hey girl,

     You are right. Sex sells. We’re trying to change that problem. Did you know that there are 12.3 MILLION people in the United State that are trafficked?? This is a statistic found through the United States Department of Health and Human Services. 50% are women. Did you know that the world generates at least 3 billion dollars a year in pornography? 3 billion. 1 billion of that is produced in Sherman Oaks, CA…right here in the U.S. Yes, sex does sell, hunny. And if you have ever met a girl that is domestically sex trafficked- right here in the United States- born and raised, you would understand the demand for sex needs to go. We cannot forget that our minds are delicately made, and are easily influenced by what we see and hear. You are right, there are sex messages every where. So, marketing a lingerie line to young middle school girls is telling the problem that it’s not a problem. It’s telling the problem that it’s acceptable. Yet, It’s not acceptable. Young girls buying sexy lingerie only gives in to allowing boys and TV and magazines to continue doing what they’re doing. We ALL have to do our part- even VS.

     Make sense? We’re trying to END THE DEMAND. Can’t do that when little girls are running around in lingerie. Go to LA and see the baby girls that are being bought and sold on the street in their “lingerie,” and then you can argue that VS has a moral right to do what they are doing.

     END THE DEMAND, girl. We’re trying to END THE DEMAND.

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     • Really? You’re going to end the demand for sex? You’re going to end a perfectly natural biological instinct that every single human being has?

       I agree with you on the sex trafficking. It is a huge problem. However, to end the desire to have sex? How, pray tell, do you plan to rid the human race of its biology? I’m genuinely interested to know.

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     • Alicia – Read a little deeper, sweetie. The issue is to end the demand for human trafficking. As an educator in Thailand, it is sickening to know every day hundreds of young girls are trapped, abducted, and sold as foreigner “play things” on the street. But, as was already pointed out, it is a huge problem in the US, the “land of opportunity”. Don’t be so petty as to mince words – volunteer at a shelter for battered women and see how biological your argument is. Perhaps if more parents took control of their families back from advertisers and businesses like VS, rather than tiptoe around the PC “don’t be offensive or judgmental” mantra, it would go a long way in helping. Companies won’t invest millions of dollars in something that just sits on the rack in the store.

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   • Underwear can be lacy and prettty without the little inuendos writtern on them…parents need to understand the message you are sending…and you need to understand that you are beautiful even in grannie undies…the underwear doen’t make a person sexy….I know…I wore the grannies too, and believe me the boy’s still looked. It’s the other girls that made fun of you and they are the ones who’s self worth were probably at a big fat zero. Boys will be what they are in the teen years over stimulated hormonal beasts and parents need to teach the boy’s to respect women…most boys grow up and become repectful men and when they have daughters of their own, cringe at the way they treated girls in HS. All this said you seemed to have survived your traumatic granny underwear days just fine and I am sure the VS undies really only changed the way you look at yourself…not the way others have seen you all along…because remember the boys don’t have xray eyes.

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   • ever wondered why people from other countries think american women are loose and immoral?

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     • Totally. I forget that all VS models are American and that VS is an American-exclusive brand.

       Thanks for clearing that up.

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   • Thank you for your reply. It was very enlightening to me! I am now 10 years out of high school and can’t believe how different middle school and high school life is like. Actually even in high school I remember thinking that the younger girls were “advancing” faster sexually than my class did. I will trust an 18-year-olds opinion on what this really means for early teenage girls than a grown mans opinion.

     It wasn’t until high school that I started to compare my undies to my peers and therefore change my shopping preference to Victoria’s Secret. But even in high school we weren’t having undies that had any sex words on them and they truly were pretty not “sexy.”

     Basically, you’re stating that the true origins of this problem is not created by victory secret but already exists because of our current culture (music, tv, movies, porn, magazines full of fake women) mixed together with the basic nature and needs of girls/women (wanting to feel pretty, loved and wanted).
     This makes me realize that Victoria’s Secret isn’t the cause of the problem rather they are simply capitalizing on.
     For you to be 18 years old and have this kind of understanding makes me wonder what you believe some solutions would be? What has helped you throughout your adolescence?
     Obviously we can’t change the mentality of our young girls and we can’t completely remove them from our culture. In my opinion, it all comes down to parenting. I never received any direction from my parents and I was definitely one of those girls that sought the attention of boys and quite frankly based my esteem on their opinions. It took years to overcome that.

     Now as I have a daughter I wonder what I could do. I intend to have an open conversation with her but more so set a good example. I want to be intentional and mindful about how I am dressing myself, how I am talking about myself/my body and others, And what I choose to watch and listen to in the entertainment world.

     Do you have other suggestions comments?

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   • The contradiction here is, you say they send pictures of themselves half naked to boys, wearing the frilly underwear, because they get attention, and it makes them feel pretty. So selling sex is an acceptable goal in todays society?

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   • you have a point but we are talking MIDDLE SCHOOL AGE children not high schoolers…this does go back to parenting however VS shouldnt make a target market for young girls it just makes the sex thing worse. If you think it wont make them more curious i would have to say you are mistaken. We live a world full of sex and im sorry but just because you want to feel pretty doesnt mean you need to have underwear that can make you seem cheap…VS is on the tag but no one cares about that … there are children out there that will say things like because you wear those you are easy…and if you dont believe me fine but i experienced it first hand. The problem is also that young girls dont understand that it shouldnt define them and if it shouldnt define them then why do they need it? At middle school ages of 9-13 why do you need to feel sexy???? pretty fine get some cotton flower panties with a matching bra but sexy???? like lace and cheekies?? really??? no I have to disagree they shouldnt know what sexy is at all. They should however know what class is…what self-esteem is…what not worrying about growing up too soon is like…cause when you grow up too fast your body may fit the part but your mind dont…you see what im saying? At that age i know they want attention and that is where parents need to step in and show them and tell them how they should and deserve to be treated… with respect .. and not relying on what underwear they have that they can show off. Sexy is for Adults..Pretty is for children.

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   • Maybe…just maybe – if we girls and women stood up for ourselves and demanded respect, the boys and men would be gentlemen and oblige us. On that note, we owe them more respect than they get too.
     VS has everything to do with how boys talk about and treat us. The entire human race contributes to this – the marketing campaign of VS being no exception. And yes, the world has access to porn at it’s fingertips…but doesn’t it all start with the little things like VS magazines and things of that nature? We could call it soft porn if we really wanted to.
     And, no…I don’t think one person can change THE world by demanding to be treated with more respect than they currently receive – but they can change the thoughts and actions of those in their sphere of influence, and that’s the same as changing THEIR world.

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     • Or, you know, we can raise our boys and men to not treat us like sex objects through parenting and communication. You talk like men objectifying women has only been a problem since VS became a business, let’s think about that for a moment.

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   • I’m a 22 year old guy and all I have to say to you is that your right guys are intrigued with sex. But do you want them to give you attention or sex appeal attention. I personally am disgusted and disinterested with a woman who sells herself cheap to buy more sex appeal. I have been pursued many times, but I can honestly say that I’ve only dated one girl. That relationship didn’t work out in the end, but my point is that the majority of women have decided to take the easier and cheaper route to get a man’s attention. You see it every day by the way that girls flirt with vocal and body language. My advice, don’t just preserve your virginity for your one and only; Keep your dignity intact as well. A woman who is strong enough to go against the norm and be different is far more attractive than one who wears her shirt just a tad bit lower.

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   • I didn’t start wearing VS underwear and bras until late in college. First of all they are completely overrated (and poor quality must I say) and guess what, I survived. If you get picked on because of what you wear than it’s your choice to either join their inner circle of trash wearing tramps or be above them and stand out. High School will not last forever, but your life will. It will build character, which will not be built otherwise if you followed the crowd.

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   • I didn’t start wearing VS underwear and bras until late in college. First of all they are completely overrated (and poor quality must I say) and guess what, I survived. If you get picked on because of what you wear than it’s your choice to either join their inner circle of trash wearing tramps or be above them and stand out. High School will not last forever, but your life will. It will build character, which will not be built otherwise if you followed the crowd.

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6. I have a 10 year old granddaughter, and this bit of information stresses me greatly. I thought women of my generation put all of this nonsense behind us, but it seems not to be as long as there’s money to be made at the expense of children! I will encourage a boycott of Victoria’s Secret.

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7. Surely this is a man’s idea as I can’t imagine A WOMEN STSNDING FOR THIS!

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8. Agree Agree Agree, couldnt have said it better myself. I already don’t like this type of clothing for high school girls and especially advertising with young males in the house or even just walking through the mall. Cudos to you Dad! I for one won’t be purchasing.

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9. What happened to parents just saying NO! It is not the responsiblity of the store and companies to keep your kids in line. That being said, it would be nice if the right thing over trumpeted profit sometimes.

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10. I am 25 with a 5yr old and 2yr old daughters and hapilly married (who I have been with for 5 yrs) but I didn’t not before hand but from that store till we had been in our relationship for a while. Now I do buy from there to show off for him. That store is made to show things off and make sexual gestures towards the opposite sex of whatever you desire, I have been shoppin there for a while now and ot of my purchases have been with the sayings. For instance I have a pair that says “pin me down” withsafety pins all over them…really? How can people blame this dad for being so concerned about his daughter? Like I said we have 2 and they scare the hell outta me now I couldn’t imagine adding this worry on top of that, esp with how early kids are having sex! I agree with him 110%, this store should only be for adults and not children and teenagers are children untill they have learned responsibility and respect!!

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11. The words from your mouth might say “no” but the words on your drawers say “yes, do me like the slutty animal I am…”

    Sounds harsh? Sounds like “blame the victim”? I work with teens. A young man who lacks impulse control mixed with a teenage girl/young woman who might as well and have found themselves in a compromising situation is a recipe for disaster. I deal with these situations all the time. I am not a “stick in the mud”. I am a man, a single man, in his mid 30’s. I coach female athletes. Take a listen at what these youth today talk about in the schools, in their lives, and in their social media. They ask things to teachers and adults that are (a)shocking that they know about (b)shocking that they are others they know participate in (c)are so common that they are discussed freely (d) my generation of school student didn’t know about / and if we did would not be trying to discuss it openly with teachers. We are talking some of the most taboo sex acts, group sex, sex with multiple partners on one night, etc. IRRESPONSIBLE behavior at its finest. Think I am kidding? Think I am exaggerating? Think again. Teenage girls today are becoming as sexually aggressive and perverse and teenage boys.

    It used to chill me to see these young girls come to the schools I used to work and coach in dressed one way, and then come out of a bathroom in outfits so small that they were hidden in their purses. Juicy and Pink were usually emblazoned across their backsides. I have had to send kids out of my classroom because they were dressed in clothing so short that it looked like they had no clothing on from the waist down when they were seated.

    Giving someone nice clothes to wear can be “empowering”. When that object says “objectify me”, it ceases to empower one to be anything other than a shinier object.

    Kudos to this man for speaking his conviction.

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12. Seriously everyone, we live in a capitalistic society which means we have the power to buy or more importantly not buy any product. Trust me the large companies only care about one thing…their bottom line. And that’s ok because that’s their job. Our job as consumers is to NOT purchase products that are harmful to us. It’s not easy but….it works. The conversations about sex and women and bodies and kids, etc. is just a diversion. The diversion in itself creates more marketing for the company. In this case, Victoria Secret is owned by The Limited Brands corporation I believe who also owns Bath and Body and other companies. If you really want a corporation to listen, STOP shopping at all of their companies. If 100,000 people decided that they don’t like the way Victoria Secret is portraying women and decided to not shop there or at Bath/Body and whatever other company they own for instance, something would change. Period. Why did McDonald’s start putting apples in every kids meal? Because they felt bad about the nutritional value of their kids meal? No. Because they got public pressure which could have cost them millions. That’s why. Period. So, no more arguing about objectifying women. We know it happens along with lots of other bad stuff. Let’s just focus putting our money where our mouth is on the issues that are important to us.

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13. As a mother of 3 girls I strongly agree with this father! It is sad that Victoria’s Secret would stoop to this level! I don’t care for this company as it is because they make their profit off of slaving others in foreign countries by using sweatshops! Amanda I understand you work for these people, but you really should know what kind of company you are sitting here defending! There is nothing ok about a company that has their products made overseas by individuals that work 14 hours a day and are hardly ever allowed off and are paid less then $20 a week and the only products promoted on the tv is for a woman to be a symbol or object! So sad! This father is very right for speaking up and instead of sitting here correcting his view of things, maybe you should take into account that your view may be a little distorted!

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14. I’m going to “vote with my wallet” and not only not buy the undergarments aimed at middle school kids, but as long as VS continues to target kids, I’ll avoid buying any of their products.

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15. Rev. Dolive,

    I could NOT have said the words better. I do not have a child yet myself, but I am woman who grew up and was in middle school when thong underwear began hitting the market. I never fell into the trend of wearing, but almost felt worse about myself because I didn’t wear them. (I was and am all about the comfort.) Now of course, I am ok with my decision, but it, among other things back then related to self age caused me to have a long battle with low self-esteem. Some girls battle low-self esteem without images or products like Victoria Secret throws at them, not to mention the visual images the see of “regular teens” on scripted tv shows marketed at their age group. They are not aware that teenagers are more than the skimpiest pair of underwear or loosest standard of sexual relations with another person.
    You did a great job talking about other things teenager should be and could be involved in. I think for every foul marketing ploy that affects young girls and women (I think women’s self esteem can be just as trashed as a teenager.) We should stand up and educate an alternative thing our girls and women can so and be. They can be more than sex objects (I HATE the statues wearing scantily clad sexy undergarments in WINDOW displays of Victoria Secret. Even if you don’t shop there, you still have to explain to your child what that image is and why it is wrong.) Something I would like to avoid entirely. Something else along the same vein that I hate is another store, Abercrombie & Fitch, which exposes half naked men and women on the walls and store shopping bags. I remember as a young teen, this was a new store & I was enticed by these bags (I was 7-8th grade). It was more sexualization than I needed at that age, but nobody told me that. I just had to grow up and realize how inappropriate
    That was. We need to have just as eye catching displays, commercials, use modern tech to show girls, teens, women, that we are more than the 1nch or many extra inches of body fat on our body. We are more than the cup size of our bra and the thinest, smallest material of our underwear. But we aren’t doing enough public education to show these girls that if the happen to grow up smaller or larger than a size 0-2, or choose a sports bra over the lacy push-up bras, that they aren’t failures. They will still find other people who like them for just who they are. Sure, some CEO’s fantasy is to see scantily clad, tight, firm bodies 20 something’s prancing around his office, but this is not reality. Did or has Victoria Secret’s CEO pictured their daughter wearing such
    Attire? We need to advertise to girls, young women & adult females. You are worth more than your undergarments, you are more than your name brand sweat pants with Juicy written across the butt. You, young father can help your daughter to revolutionize the world as it views and over sexualizes woman. And maybe not her, but someone needs to being about the “sex icon revolution” and throw it In the trash.

    CArry on Rev!

    You have my prayers!
    –
    Sara

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16. I am 29 years old and just began shopping at VS. After having 4 kids, they were the only place I could find for my size. I was embarrassed the first time I went into my local store (with my husband, no less), and though I had some expectations, was floored by what was there. My husband was shocked to see moms buying items for their tween and teen girls there. Everything was very suggestive and we did not linger.

    The catalogs are just as bad. I won’t even look at them or keep them around. They get tucked into the garbage. It is a shame, because they do have a reputation for good quality clothing, a variety of styles, and a wide variety of sizes.

    Still, the buck stops with parents and guardians who pay for, encourage, or at the least never discourage their daughters from wearing such things. VS is, unfortunately, not the only suggestive store in the mall.

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17. Totally agree with this father and i respect him for stating it out and sending it to Victoria. Its true, a girls self worth is far more than a thong or anything of such. Please do send the right message to the children, our future leaders.

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18. Well said, indeed! Thank you for sticking your neck out & speaking the truth. Hopefully, VS will take a serious look at their marketing. I know what they are doing…trying to capture the girls at this young age so they’ll be customers into their 20’s or 30’s or more. But, they’ll find you VS when they are at an appropriate age. My daughters’ did and so will my teen granddaughters. PLEASE help the parents, help the culture by not exploiting little girls & setting them up for trouble at an age they cannot handle trouble,.

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19. This kind of stuff is crap and shouldn’t be marketed to any kind of unmarried woman. Unless you are a woman who will say that your sexual promiscuity is the source of your identity and that it makes you happier than otherwise normal wearing panties and underwear I find this to be nothing more than smut clothing, in my opinion. Any non-hypocratic women out there who would like to take up and opposite position? I would be glad to discuss. I will also suggest you look up one word while you are at it called “repentance”.

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    • I normally don’t do this, but I can’t sleep tonight without saying something about this.

      This post, sir, is the most ignorant post I have ever read. I’m not going to attempt to wage an argument with you because, let’s be honest with each other, no one wins in an argument. I will, however, be pleased to begin a civil and cordial discussion about the logic behind your stance on this matter. I place extra emphasis on the word “logic”.

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20. Here we go again. I just turned eighteen years old and despite all your thoughts and ridiculous notions, I have always had a mind of my own. I can formulate my own thoughts (shocker) and unlike the supposed pod people of our society do not place any blame of my actions on anything but myself. If your child is that impressionable that a brand like VS can pose such a threat, YOU have done something wrong. What don’t you get about the target audience “late teens early twenties?” For those that pose the argument, that it doesn’t matter because younger girls will desire this, are you suggesting that we clear the world of everything adult targeted because kids MIGHT want it? That is the most ridiculous argument I have heard in a long time. It is not the brand’s nor the media’s responsibility to coddle and raise your children. Laziness and the refusal to take responsibility is the downfall of this generations parenting. As for the various cries on the dangers VS poses to feminism, I laugh at every single one. The stem of the problem to feminism is the acknowledgement that a women can’t think of herself as sexy without relating it to a man. Do you know why I love it when underneath my clothing I’m secretly matching my panties to my bra? Because I love to feel like I take care of myself and that makes me feel pretty. This make come as a shock, but I do not dress myself for the acceptance of a man but for the empowerment that it gives me. I like taking care of myself because I think every women should embrace their bodies. I want to feel sexy for myself and I take offence to your belief that if I want to feel sexy I must be doing it for a man because I see myself as nothing but a man’s object. Also, I am fairly large chested and for you to create a correlation between my bra size and my IQ is insulting. I began college at age 16 and I am on my way to hopefully becoming a respected and revered legal practitioner. In closing, if you feel the need to point fingers point them at your own homes. We were all given a brain so I suggest you use it.

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    • *Teenager *offense

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      • My comment was not directed to you. It was directed to the one who commented on your post.

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    • 18 and already has life all figured out.

      …heard THAT before…

      You are no doubt a smart young lady if you entered college at 16. However, as you will have already figured out, if you dress in clothing that is “revealing” or “suggestive”, no one is thinking about how smart you must be.

      As I stated before in a reply, there is a difference between “sexy” and “sex object”. When you advertise sex, you aren’t in the “sexy” category anymore.

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      • So because you’re married or have been married and had a couple of kids, you now have life figured out?

        And you’re forgetting that VS’s primary market is underwear…not clothes. This girl is obviously smart enough to know that she can be sexy under her clothes without jeopardizing her image and reputation.

        You can learn something from those younger than you.

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      • No I don’t have my life figured out and I’m beginning to believe that no one does, but that’s the beauty of life. Although, I still can set goals for myself can’t I?

        As for the “revealing” clothing you’re right obviously, but I fail to see how this is relevant. If you’re suggesting that I gave you the impression that I like to dress myself in suggestive clothing, you’re wrong. In fact, unfortunately I dress specifically to hide my body as best that I can because what would look modest on most girls would look revealing on myself. I guess that’s a flaw in my self-esteem (I’m not perfect) but people such as commentors like some above seem to think that if you have curves you’re dim. Or if you’re replying to my comment on how I feel that a women should be allowed to dress sexy for herself, I was referring to undergarments. However, I believe in free will, so if someone chooses to dress suggestive on the outside as well, then good for them, as long as they are not offending anyone.

        Sex is a matter of opinion and to that I say to each their own.

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    • It is kind of ridiculously to only blame the parents. A person is a product of his/her experiences which include the family unit and the society as a whole. As much as a parent may want to shelter and control their child, the child will be influenced. It is great that you think you are so mature, being 18 and all but the issue isn’t about wanting to feel sexy underneath your clothing. More power to you, but what business does a middle-school aged student have trying to be sexy thanks to her underwear. Why do you feel empowered by wearing provocative lingerie? Yes, it is important to embrace your body but I really disagree with your post altogether.

      Parents (and all people for that matter) should be concerned with the possibility of the creation of this line. It just shows the further moral degradation of our society. Pretty underwear is one thing. Underwear with suggestive sayings is another. No 12 year old should have underwear suggesting she wants sex. The availability of such products sends a confusing message to adolescents.

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      • I don’t even know where to start, there’s so much to say.

        It is kind of ridiculous to assume society should mold and censor itself because a parent has failed in arming their child with the morals and state of mind to handle the real world. Yes, there are a number of factors that influence a child but guess who’s DUTY it is to provide them with the tools needed? They’re GUARDIAN, not society, I repeat NOT society. The media does not care, society does not care, business’s have no care in raising your kids and they shouldn’t. If a child is that susceptible to their environment, that is no one’s responsibility but there caregiver’s.Not to mention the fact that us arguing over children is irrelevant. Children are not the targeted audience late teens+ are. Like I said, if you are proposing VS as a threat because a child may stumble upon something that was not even targeted towards them is ignorant. A child’s bringing up is centered around preparation for the real world and if a child is not competent to make a thought of their own, then something has seriously gone wrong.

        “Why do you feel empowered by wearing provocative lingerie? Yes, it is important to embrace your body but I really disagree with your post altogether.” I feel empowered when I know I look good because I like to take care of myself and if pretty undergarments achieve so, who are you to judge? You can’t really disagree with someone’s opinion about their own self, it doesn’t work that way. “Looking good is something that comes inherently…all the other beauty care stuff just accentuates it.” I realize that my thoughts are my own and if I allow myself to become a product of my society then I am doomed. As for the “provocative lingerie,” one thing that I like about VS is that it cater’s to any woman’s need. No matter if it’s cute and comfy or even “provocative.” And guess what if you don’t like one section there’s another (no way!).

        I can’t address all the ridiculous statement’s I’ve read on this blog because frankly I would have to write a novel but let’s take back control of our own mind’s. Stop degrading your teens by assuming they have nothing in their skulls for which to make decisions of their own.

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      • I’ve got news for you, concerned citizen. Corporations along with the whole of society do not give two shits about your kids. Frankly, to expect them to is ludicrous. Why? Kids are not their target market! When it comes to advertising, companies cannot control who is exposed to what exactly. All they can do is do the appropriate research to determine the best ways to reach the people they want to reach. It’s business. In advertising, naturally, there will be some collateral damage (i.e. 13-year-old Mary picking up mom’s VS swim catalog). Does this exposure mean that Mary is all of sudden going to feel inferior because she doesn’t where lacy panties? No.

        As I have said in previous posts, it is unfair to the adult world for businesses to cater to “kids’ eyes”. Yes, sex is amplified a lot in today’s society, but give credit where it’s deserved. To assume that kids lack the capability to think for themselves and discriminate between real world and business world is just silly. If anything, it’s insulting to the kids.

        As far as empowerment is concerned, I would like to say that Vs embraces all body shapes and design preferences. You can walk into a VS and see women from all walks of life coming together with one thing in common: the confidence of knowing that they will all look good under their clothes and feel good knowing that the products are of high quality. Don’t like the black lacy thong that has “get lucky” on the front? That’s all fine and good, there are other options in the store! Despite popular belief, VS sells panties that don’t have words on them. Shocker, right?

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    • you are eighteen ..this new market is for MIDDLE SCHOOL aged children…. slow down and rethink …regroup. No one is pointing fingers at you they are asking that the target audience be kept to the late teen and twenties. Yes this should go back to parenting absolutely but stores and social media dont help with how they portray the expectation of pretty. Girls this young dont need to think sexy they have barely begun puberty. We are talking 9-14 not 17-24. Parenting does and should play a crucial part in this but again knowing that the TARGET MARKET is for MIDDLE SCHOOL AGED CHILDREN…. CHILDREN…not young adults but CHILDREN could use a little reconsideration. That is very very young for a girl to be wearing something like that. Its not about getting rid of what they “MIGHT want” its about keeping the line between adults and children clearly drawn. Also we arent talking matching panties and bra we talking sayings like “feeling lucky?” or “call me” and why does a 12yr need cheekies? I personally dont see how that empowers anyone especially at that age. However I hope i have made a point and may your dreams of Law come true and you do well at it and im glad you have a high self-esteem but again this isnt talking about you personally… its almost a whole decade behind you…

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      • Can you provide me with a media or marketing plan that explicitly states VS’s target audience for their BYT collection?

        If you go on the VS website and shop the BYT collection, it’s pretty easy to tell that the target audience is college women going to the beach for Spring Break…you’ll also notice that there is no underwear in that particular collection. It consists of swimwear, shoes, accessories and shirts.

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      • All I can add to what has already been said is, Early teen: 12-15. Late teen:16-19. Amazing how a decade can almost be interpreted as 2 years now.

        P.S. “matching panties” happen to be my guilty pleasure but to each their own.
        P.P.S. Alicia made a good point.

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21. All girls want pretty underwear, starting when they are potty trained. At ages 2 and 3 they want Dora the Explorer, Hello Kitty and other animated figures on their pretty panties, and their only goal is to stay dry so they can wear one pair all day long. They get a little older, and they still want pretty panties. Not sexy panties, just pretty panties. I remember (and I know how badly–and accurately–this statement dates me), but I remember when having a new “days of the week” pack of panties at the start of the new school year was a big deal: you know, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, etc. Please VS, please, do not exploit our little girls for monetary gains. Let them be little girls as long as possible. We have the rest of our lives to be adults, and you can make your money off us when we are grown. I’m so disappointed that you would even consider featuring such a line of underwear. Our litle girls don’t belong in your store. Please make an effort to show some class.

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22. I seldom visit VS…a big reason that I don’t? … My husband was unfaithful to me…one of the things I discovered he and his girlfriend would do together? They would sit and go through the VS catalogue. I recognize VS didn’t intend for their product to be used in such a way. But, it goes to show, intentionally or not…this is a life style that embraces the VS product. The models are air burshed into unrealistic perfection, creating an imaginary image that real women/girls can’t live up to. VS is selling sex…at the very least catering to it. Yes, we as women SHOULD embrace our sexuality. However, where do we draw the line as consumers and/or retailers? No, I agree…Hershey doesn’t MAKE me eat chocolate, thus making me fat. But, I don’t know of a chocoholic that’s sold into slavery for eating chocolate…yes, this may seem a silly comparison…my husband would have had his affair anyway…but, VS DID play a part in it by providing the KIND of ads they use. They sale sex hiding behind panties and bras…notably, there’s not much room to hide. VS has a beautiful product. Can they stop men like my husband and women like his girlfriend from misuseing their advertising? NO. Is that how it’s intended? It appears, that’s not their concern. Sexy sells…period. I don’t have a prob if someone feels better about themselves when wearing pretty under garments. But, I don’t need some sexy lil hot moma sellin me my panies and bras. Honestly, it’s just depressing even degrading. So, I can’t think that the models and the product they are wearing are intended to sell to women like me. I’m in my late 50s and have been told I look younger than my age but it’s still discouraging to want to be what I was thirty years ago so that I could even BEGIN to look like the promoters of VS panties and bras. Their ads and products leave me feeling devalued just as my husband and his girlfriend did. Again, I realize the affairs I’ve had to deal with over the years are not to be blamed on VS…but, I can say that when I walk by one of their stores or see one of their ads, I’m reminded of how the VS catalogue was used by my husband. Just sayin…the product is pretty and high quality enough without having to promote it on winged angles that are barely wearing any clothes. I know I sound like a prude…I’m not, not at all. But, the modles aren’t geared toward women, they’re geared toward men, females of all ages want to be found attractive, desirable but with such a high, unrealistic standard it’s hard to come away feeling “sexy” when one has an older body to try to make attractive with pretty panties and bras or sleepware…whatever. I think this dad’s comments are appropriate as are his concerns. “Wild”, “lucky”, etc., may be marketed as for St Pat. Day or for supposedly an untamed animal but the men and probably alot of the women buying these clothes are not tossing “lucky” panties away after the big green day has come and gone nor do women or men honestly buy panties and bras to be like an animal, at least not the four legged kind…so, it’s a free country…sell what you will but be truthful, realistic about the product…this isn’t PETA … it’s pretty undergarments for the purpose of pleasing your man, if you can get his mind off the perfect way the bra and panties look on VS peeps. I had my day with a prettier body. Word up though, I’m older…not DEAD. Sell what you will to who you will…just admit to what you’re
    using to sell your product…just like my former husband and his girlfriend misused VS catalogues, I think VS misuses sex to sell panties and bras…all be them beautiful and of great quality. Just my thougts, opinions…another perspective.

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23. This is sad. This whole debate is just sad. Have we all forgotten that we have this wonderful notion of free will? How about this, parents, instead of waiting for your daughter to have the desire to buy cute, sexy underwear to validate her self-worth, you instill the idea of her self-worth at an early age so she can understand the difference between reality and marketing? Novel, right? To ask a successful company to alter their vision, advertising and other vital marketing tactics just because we are afraid that our daughters will become overnight sluts after going into a Victoria’s Secret is outright nonsensical.

    Whether you choose to believe it or not, Victoria’s Secret is a leading provider in women’s lingerie. It became that for a reason. Victoria’s Secret caters to a broad audience, not just young women. People forget this. If you walk into your local VS tomorrow, I guarantee you’re not going to see just one type of woman. And that’s a beautiful thing! Parents claim that VS is advertising self-esteem and confidence. In reality, VS advertises lingerie, plain and simple.

    As a daughter who struggled with low self-esteem, I am insulted by a lot of parents’ position on this matter. You’re insinuating that your daughters will not be intelligent enough to know that self-esteem comes from the self (this should go without saying, hence “self”-esteem).

    I understand that, as parents, you want to protect your babies from the cruelties of the world we live in. I’m not completely daft, I will say that our world is a more dangerous place than it was in the past, but trying to protect your kids from something that is completely out of your control and in the hands of people who, let’s be honest, are out to just make some money (who isn’t?). As a parent, it should be YOUR sole responsibility to TALK with your kids about self-esteem and confidence. It’s not the job of a private corporation to parent your kids and to expect them to do so is absolutely ridiculous. This debate doesn’t even end with VS. This applies to companies that create Mature rated video games, television producers who air violent or sexual media, etc. The adult world shouldn’t have to be held to the same standards as children just because of a parent’s natural tendency to over-worry.

    In conclusion, VS sells freakin’ cute, and more importantly comfortable, underwear. They do not sell confidence, self-esteem or beauty. THEY SELL LINGERIE. Parents sell confidence, and after reviewing these comments, sales are obviously down. Be confident in your kids to know, and your kids will be confident in themselves and they will know.

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    • I like that you say that parents need to be instilling self-worth, self-esteem and value long before they hit the age to buy pretty panties. This is the job of the parent. However, we have a parenting crisis across America. Girl, we have a parenting crisis. There are 156,000 children in the U.S. in Foster Care (U.S. Department of Human and Health Services). Where are their parents?? Their parents didn’t want them or couldn’t take care of them- what an esteem booster that is, right? People have an obligation to protect those that are vulnerable. That means right now, at the very least, there are 156,000 vulnerable children that we need to be protecting. Don’t forget the forgotten.

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    • Alicia, thanks for your great points.

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24. I have never been a fan of VS, because of the panties, bras, etc . Cover up girls it has always made men use their imaginations . Girls and women will learn to respect themselves and so will the boys and men. Don’t yell rape if you are dressing like a slut, because SAYING NO, means nothing to the boys or men in today’s
    society. JUST SAYING

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    • “Don’t yell rape if you are dressing like a slut, because SAYING NO, means nothing to the boys or men in today’s society.” ARE YOU DUMB? Obviously. Wow Jackie- talk about ignorant and judgmental, unless you yourself have been raped I suggest keeping your ignorant comments to yourself. 1. girls that are covered up get raped too, 2. just because a girl dresses promiscuous doesn’t mean she has a sign on her head saying “rape me because I’m asking for it” seriously? wtf. STFU.

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    • That’s another problem. Women today do not give men credit where they deserve it. This among many other reasons are why men treat us like shit. We’re mutually disrespecting each other.

      You’ve basically just stated that all boys/men are destined to be sex-hungry monsters for the rest of their days. Do you forget that 3 men died protecting their girlfriends during the shooting in Aurora, CO? Don’t sit there and tell me that all men are pigs.

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25. In light of this conversation, this article is VERY relevant.

    For those of you parents who really aren’t aware that “lucky” panties are just the tip of the iceberg, READ this article:

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2264781/Corrupting-generation-In-new-major-Mail-series-renowned-psychologist-Steve-Biddulph-argues-daughters-facing-unprecedented-crisis.html

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26. I feel this way…I have 3 daughters and if you are not married, you should not be interested in wearing sexy underwear because no one should be seeing your underwear. I don’t personally like VS’s advertising as it is borderline soft porn. I wish my daughters were more interested in being the best they can be instead of being overly sexy and showing off their bodies.

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27. Hi Pastor Evan,

    I am a Christian Dad,
    Married w 4 kids.
    I love what you have done here!
    Please see the dialogue that is open below Btwn believers and unbelievers. Thanks for obeying God. I can not tell you how many times just in the last couple months I have to turn magazines backwards at the checkout stand to guard my eyes and heart and protect my 7 and 6 yr old boys…it’s an entire culture…see the Title of the book my wife coauthored “Unmasked”.

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    • You do not have to be with GOD and a Christian to have morale’s.

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28. Yes. wouldn’t you all say that there really is a war on women? But can you deny that this world is also fighting men in the same war? There are truths which are surfacing, such as “the media is a business” and that sex trafficking is very real, even in the united states. More lies include large company businesses making products that poison and weaken us, such as hair products, deodorants, body washes, toothpastes, vaccines, the poisons in our air, in our water, and in our food. Breast cancer awareness? That is a business. The truth about cancer, is that it is one of the many things out there meant on killing you. What causes cancer? Toxins, radiation, bad diets, sitting and yelling in front of an idiot box all day long watching other sweaty men run back and fourth, back and fourth across a grass square. Preventing cancer? It’s easy to understand. Clean the water, clean the air, eat healthier, and more natural, workout, enjoy nature… Greed, and lust for power is killing this world. Some care, and try to scream to make a change, while others do nothing…

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29. I salute you dad. Little girls or boys should cherish their childhood, and be left as kids, cos they will have enough on their plates once they are adults. I don’t understand these brands..money isn’t everything!!!

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30. Clearly the Reverend did not research the article before he wrote this supposed letter. There is none of things listed on Victoria’s Secret website for line called Pink is shown what the author said there is.

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31. I have always associated Victorias Secret with professional achievement. I have viewed professional models and the quality clothing same as I view Olympic Athletes. If Victorias Secret is going to pervert their image then there is great opportunity for a competitor to gain market foothold to supply to intelligent, savvy, leading edge women that want to look good.

    Let Victorias Secret trash themselves and let’s vote with our purchases by buying from the smarter retailers. I am a father of two young women and even though I really like VS. I will point them elsewhere if VS afflicts how they measure their self worth.

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32. I am a 20 year old girl, and I have to agree with this father. As much as sex sells, I also believe (and call me old fashioned) you should be with someone you love )and are married to) when you give up something so personal. I am disgusted that a quality company like VS is targeting such an impressionable age group with “sexy” undergarments. At that age, kids should be going out to the park, going for bike rides, stressing out over spelling tests, not worrying about whether or not their underwear is sexy. As a previous commenter stated, yes, this is the time that girls will be changing for gym, and if someone is to make fun of you for your underwear, they are probably insecure as it is, and wear the “sexy” underwear to boost their low self-esteem. So what if you wear fruit of the loom? It doesn’t matter. If you like who you are and are earning respect because you love yourself, you are bettering not only yourself, but showing other girls that you don’t have to wear sexy undies to be special and wonderful and beautiful. God created people differently so that we can see beauty in everything.

    So a great big thank you to Rev. Dolive, this point needed to be made. I only hope that Victoria Secret sees the error of their ways. They can release the underwear line, but to an older group (that have the money to spend and the boobs to fill a bra).

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33. As a parent of a teenager and another one that is 11, I completely agree with this letter. Raising kids at that age is hard enough, encouraging them to think about sexual activity at that age is completely inappropriate.

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34. And frankly, we’re bitching about panties?

    I would say that, as a whole, we have bigger fish to fry, wouldn’t you agree?

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    • Helping raise the next generation is the biggest fish I could possibly imagine.

      In relation to some other comments: We can talk to our children until we’re all blue in the face, but at the end of the day, they make their own decisions. No, buying VS products does not guarantee skewed self-esteem – but it might mean that.

      And for the many comments that parents can use their heads and shop for unmentionables from Wal-Mart, (or any other store besides VS)…just remember: children do plenty without you knowing. Even when you talk and are involved in their life. I can remember years ago in middle school, there was a gal that would completely change her outfit everyday on the bus..because she knew her parents wouldn’t approve of what SHE wanted to wear. Her parents obviously didn’t know about part of her wardrobe.

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      • I agree with you on that. You bring up an excellent point. Teenagers are teenagers and they will attempt to do things without their parents knowledge. But this isn’t about forbidding them to wear a particular brand, because what do most kids do when their parents say don’t do this? They will try to do it. It’s about providing your kids with a sustainable explanation. At least then, you know you’ve given your child the knowledge he or she needs to make that decision.

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    • You were the one that was talking about free will…. so shutup and listen to the other peoples opinions or stop posting on here. They are concerned parents and have every right to be concerned. The world you grew up in is very different then the world the generation before grew up in. Parents are just doing their jobs… they are allowed to be worried. The problems we see today with body image issues and low self-esteem (particularly in girls) is a lot worse then it used to be. You say teach your children how to have higher self-esteem and be better parents… why not just get rid of the problem and buy some underwear from Walmart like my parents did when I was that age. A middle school child does not need to go to Victoria Secret to go buy underwear… especially if a parent is the one paying for it.

      Everyones entitled to their own opinion… so just let it be. Let people post about their opinions…. let them bitch if they want to…

      AND GO DAD… good for you for standing up. Girls in this world have it hard enough as it is. I am 23 years old and I glad there are people like you in this world.

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      • I love how you assumed I was 60-something. I’m 20 years old, female and successfully made it in this alleged “sex-obsessed” society we live in today with a bachelor’s degree and 2 jobs to show for it, while having shopped at VS since I was rather young I might add.

        Parents shielding their children is NOT their job. Parents arming their children with the knowledge to succeed in this messed up world IS their job. You can avoid the problem buy shopping elsewhere all day long, but the fact of the matter is, if you do not communicate an explanation as to why you won’t shop at VS, your kids will assume you’re prude and shop there out of spite. We were all teens at some point, I think this is a safe assumption.

        I would cease posting, but I simply don’t “do” ignorance. Anything I can do to help spread a little bit of logic. I don’t mean to come off as hostile, but I feel passionately about this topic. My point is that parents need to research and then pass down their knowledge to their kids instead of expecting corporations to do so.

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35. uch disgusting pedophiles apparently working at Victoria’s Secret. That is such bull shit its gross and unnecessary not to mention so harmful. Shame on them those assholes trying to make a profit while exploiting 11 year olds. I can’t even fathom this. Which moron showed up at the meeting and suggested that crap. And how drunk and high were the corporate officials when they accepted it.

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36. Seriously? Are we really having this conversation? Look…..take some responsibility. I have 3 kids, the oldest of which is 14. As a parent, I don’t take her to VS to shop for her undergarments. Shes a damn kid! She gets her unmentionables from Walmart. We can’t be blaming the store for creating a line that CLEARLY has enough market share to make it profitable. This had everything to do with those parents that choose to take their young daughters there to shop. And if that’s their choice, so be it. I regularly shop at VS for ME, a grown person. If another mother wants to put her daughter in the same lacy underwear as me, that’s her choice. My whole message? We all get to decide what’s right based on our past, upbringing and situation, and you as parents will ALSO decide what you allow in your home, regardless of what is being sold in the stores. Be aware and involved!

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37. Oh my G people! If your young daughter has sex with a guy, it’s not because she had ‘feeling lucky’ printed on her panties! It’s because she wanted to have sex!!!! Stop the blame game, and TALK to your children!! I have 3, one of which is a 14 year old girl, and this vs conspiracy is not even on the radar because we TALK to each other!!

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    • AMEN! I said the same thing

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38. They are panties people, Do your jobs as parents, YOU have the ability to guide and direct the people they become. Wearing a pair of panties that say WILD, PINK, PEACE or any of their other slogans isn’t going to define the character or actions of your child.

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    • THANK YOU!

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39. Could not have said it better, thanks for your honesty.

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40. Good Letter Rev.Evan Dolive, You said it all. My daughter means the world to me and I don’t want anyone thinking of her as a piece of meat. She has Cute underthings that she loves but she has never crossed the line to sexy. In the future, when she meets the man GOD has for her and they marry, then she will be able to wear what she wants, for her husband, and that will be her choice.

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41. Okay summing it up the parents are having problems with V.S naming there product’s “wild” or “call me”. Why!! because its DEGRADING!! as a matter of fact why are there even words on the undergarments in the first place, are they expecting boys/men to be looking there?? must be…encouraging our girls(NOT WOMEN) to explore?…There are soo many reasons as to why these brands should not marketed, im just hoping Victoria Secret will make the proper decison and not go ahead.

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42. Thank you, rev Evan dolive, from the deepest part of my heart. This hit home for me in the most genuine way possible. I am raising my 3 year old daughter by myself… And I am terrified. I have served my country in 2 different branches, worked as hard as I could my whole life, and have never encountered a situation I could not overcome…. Until I was faced with the reality of being a single, full time father to a beautiful, smart, talented little girl. This post brought tears to my eyes. I want such beautiful and wonderful things for my daughter and I work everyday with her future as my first priority. What has become “normal” or “acceptable” for young girls today has me more afraid than anything. This incredibly unfortunate situation with “Victoria’s secret” is something I was not aware of. At risk of sounding overly dramatic due to some assumed bias for my own little girl… I want this subject to be made public. This should be taken very seriously. This is a culture, and our children’s future we are dealing with. And if you ask me, that’s the only thing that is really worth fighting for. I’ll do whatever I can to spread this word but I am only one man. Please use any Channels available to you to spread awareness to this. I think you’d be pleasantly surprised at the overwhelming support across this entire country you will receive. Again…. Thank you

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43. This whole thing is BS. The “Bright Young Things” collection is a college spring break collection. Why are you people so gullible?

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44. Victoria’s Secret is a business. They are there to make money. If your child is defined by their underwear – or there outerwear – that is the fault of the parent.

    I have a daughter – she is wrapping up her masters Degree from USC (top of her class). She is defined by her choices and her actions. Not her underwear.

    I (personally) think Victoria’s Secret should reconsider – but they won’t. It is up to the parents to educate and inspire and motivate the kids. The best way to beat Victoria and her secret is to not shop there.

    In the meantime – spend time with your kid. Inspire your kid.

    Stop asking corporations to do the parenting for you.

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45. I don’t know if this has been said yet but here’s my opinion…I have 5 teenagers. 19, 15, and 13 year old boys and 17 and 16 year old girls. I remember having the same thoughts as the reverend when mine were so young. I also remebering realizing that it was, and still is, my responsibility to teach them about respecting their own, and others bodies…mine and my husbands alone. To make them feel so confidant in the Lord and themselves that being like everyone else is unnecessary has been my goal for 19 years. While they are not perfect, they do know that they can make good decisions. My point is this…when children behave in ways that have been described here as well as from my personal life there are some things lacking and a lot of the blame can be laid at the parents feet. Be open with your kids, talk about sex with them from a from a young age-(age-apropriate). Don’t be offended or act surprised when they ask questions. Make sure they understand sex is a sacred and good thing…a fun thing between a man and a woman who are married. And explain why you aren’t visiting VS any longer. Me and my daughters have shopped for our underthings here since they started needing “real” bras. Not the frilly ones for them…the basic styles that hold up to serious wear and tear. We will find a new place to go if need be…but encourage parents everywhere to talk to your kids and help them understand who they are…sons and daughters of God. Sorry if it sounds a little preachy but its truly how I feel. And I have AWESOME kids.

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46. This father knows what he is talking about. Marketing girls for sex is bad in it’s own way, but targeting young and insecure girls is even worse. I can’t believe we’ve come to this. VS, get your act together. This is disgusting.

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    • He knows what he’s talking about? Have you seen the source of his information? Or better the lack of reputable sources to support this information?

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47. A few years back, I called Victoria Secret and told them that since we all know what they sell in their store, could they PLEASE put out the more modest sleepwear out in the windows and keep the “soft porn” in the back. I had walked through the mall with my then 10 yr old son when we were assaulted with their scantily-clad mannequins. I felt I shouldn’t have to cover my kids eyes when I just want to take a stroll around the mall. This was also about the same time as their prime-time, practically nude runway shows were airing on network TV! I very politely asked them to PLEASE consider our children. They said they were sorry I felt that way….but not sorry about anything else. They care about NOTHING but the almighty dollar. Needless to say, I’ve never spent another dollar there since. It isn’t about being a “prude” or “uptight” or anything like that. I have purchased some “intimates” there before…however, I DON’T go modeling them for my children! We have a horrific pornography problem that is now world-wide and that is destroying our men and boys (and porn use among women is on the rise)…therefore destroying our families. It is an addiction that is considered worse than heroin to break. Ask any man addicted to porn how he started and for many, it was as innocent as the JCPenney catalog underwear section! We need to speak up for our children. All we ever seem to talk about is a mans or woman’s “rights” to this or that or whatever….but WHAT ABOUT the CHILDREN?!? Their young minds need to be more protected from things like Victoria Secret and all the CRAP they are feeding our girls (and this underwear line is really pushing the envelope)….taking women WAY back into the dark ages of being sex-objects. Again, the only thing that works is to NOT give them a dime of your business (I don’t care how good their bras are!)

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48. I’m not shopping at Victoria’s Secret until they take away that line, that’s for sure. That’s disguisting! No wonder so many girls and young women today have eating disorders, low self esteem and depression! I applaud this father for taking a stand! Unfortunately, this kind of attitude is everywhere, it’s not just Victoria’s Secret! No wonder this world is so messed up, there’s no integrity or ethical thinking anymore, no right or wrong, it’s just profit and people doing what’s best for them!

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    • Fun fact: There was actually a study conducted at Tillberg University that actually shows that women consistently exposed to pictures of models are actually more prone to overeating.

      Source: http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2013/01/02/168371575/can-skinny-models-undermine-your-dieting-goals

      Eating disorders and low self-esteem root from a deeper issue that can be remedied with…wait for it…PROPER PARENTING!

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      • And yes, I enjoy the word “actually”.

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      • ….You just made a comment above about the father not knowing what he is talking about because he is not using reputable sources in his writing and you just quoted a “fact” from a blog.

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      • Well, my goodness you’re right! Allow me to remedy said situation…

        http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0167811612000602

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49. I totally agree with this man’s letter. It wasn’t disrespectful at all and stated the truth. I have the same feelings he has expressed here in this letter. I have an 11 year old daughter that seems to be in more of hurry to get older. All this stuff weighs on her mind. I guide her the best I can. But when girls get around each other at school they “compete” with each other with clothes, music, popularity and start talking with boys just a little more. Things like underwear with these saying are not helping with their confidence and self worth. My daughter is very petite too and already she has said something about weight now. She says she needs to look hot like certain celebrities. Its a lot of things to
    continually be on top of as a parent. Because they

    all see the models in music, tv, magazines, everything else and see “how cool it is and howhe beautiful

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50. I agree that having the sexual sayings on the underwear is inappropriate, but aside from that, middle school is an age where girls need to start wearing bras, So y not buy them at VS. ?! U have to get them somewhere. There is nothing wrong with wearing pretty or fun underwear. Everyone has them, y not have a cute print? Just because a girl buys undergarments from VS. does not mean she’s being provocative or slutty. It means she’s getting a quality product that shell be comfortable in. Like I said, I don’t agree with the sayings, but the line itself is not such a tragic idea

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