A Letter to Victoria’s Secret From a Father

/ Rev. Evan Dolive

An open letter to Victoria’s Secret regarding their choice to make an underwear line aimed at young teenagers. (Read about it here)

Dear Victoria’s Secret,

I am a father of a three year old girl. She loves princesses, Dora the Explorer, Doc McStuffins and drawing pictures for people. Her favorite foods are peanut butter and jelly, cheese and pistachios.

Even though she is only three, as a parent I have had those thoughts of my daughter growing up and not being the little girl she is now. It is true what they say about kids, they grow up fast. No matter how hard I try I know that she will not be the little ball of energy she is now; one day she will be a rebellious teenager that will more than likely think her dad is a total goof ball and would want to distance herself from my embarrassing presence.

I know that this is far down the line and I try to spend as much time as I can with her making memories of this special time.

But as I read an article today posted on The Black Sphere, it really got me thinking that maybe the culture that we currently find ourselves in is not helping the cause.

Recently I read an article that Victoria’s Secret is launching a line of underwear and bras aimed at middle school aged children. The line will be called “Bright Young Things” and will feature ” lace black cheeksters with the word “Wild” emblazoned on them, green and white polka-dot hipsters screen printed with “Feeling Lucky?” and a lace trim thong with the words, “Call me” on the front.”

As a dad, this makes me sick.

I believe that this sends the wrong message to not only my daughter but to all young girls.
I don’t want my daughter to ever think that her self-worth and acceptance by others is based on the choice of her undergarments. I don’t want my daughter to ever think that to be popular or even attractive she has to have emblazon words on her bottom.

I want my daughter (and every girl) to be faced with tough decisions in her formative years of adolescence. Decisions like should I be a doctor or a lawyer? Should I take calculus as a junior or a senior? Do I want to go to Texas A&M or University of Texas or some Ivy League School? Should I raise awareness for slave trafficking or lack of water in developing nations? There are many, many more questions that all young women should be asking themselves… not will a boy (or girl) like me if I wear a “call me” thong?

I want my daughter to know that she is perfect the way she is; I want my daughter to know that no matter what underwear she is wearing it does not define her.

I believe that this new line “Bright Young Things” thwarts the efforts of empowering young women in this country. “Bright Young Things” gives off the message that women are sex objects. This new line promotes it at a dangerously young age.

I implore you to reconsider your decision to start this line.

By doing so you will put young girl’s self-esteem, self-worth and pride above profits.

Sincerely,

Rev. Evan Dolive
Houston, TX

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2,835 thoughts on “A Letter to Victoria’s Secret From a Father”

    • THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN REMOVED BY THE ADMIN. IN THE FUTURE PLEASE EMAIL REV. EVAN AT EVAN@EVANDOLIVE.COM WITH THE SUBJECT LINE “INAPPROIATE COMMENT- PLEASE REVIEW”

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      • If you are a parent Sandy then I have great sympathy for your children – morals are important and it appears you will never be able to positively influence any children only in a negative way. I applaud your letter Rev. and please keep doing the good job you are doing parenting. We all know there is a lot of smut out there and it is our job as parents and grandparents to protect our innocent young children from it’s destructive influences.

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      • You are sick! Hope you don’t have daughters or better…hope you don’t have children at all! You don’t deserve them!

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      • You SandyHook are a moral outrage! Hopefully he keeps his daughters fresh and morally clean. Its people like you that is ruining this country.

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      • “Sandy Hook” is the elementary school where the children and teachers were murdered. This is clearly some sick-o trying to get off.

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      • Sandy Hook – you are a sick SOB first of all for using the name you chose…and you have to be a loser and probably a child molester to put the comment you did. People like you should have their nuts cut off and fed to pigs……….

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      • Your “Sandy Hook” name is obviously an oxymoron, you are also obviously just a moron! I totally agree with the reverends remarks and would add Victorias Secret is pushing child molestation. I find it queer that Liberals want to break down proper age restrictions and sexual our children! Boycott Victoria’s Secret until they grow up!

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      • Hey yeah “Sandy Hook”! That great promiscuous sex with 1 in 4 sporting and STD/STI these day! Hooray! It’s gonna be so fun for you and your kids living with genital warts for the rest of your life. And facing old age alone because you never formed a meaningful relationship with anybody. You just gave sex away and in return got nothing. Go you!

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      • Slime emerging from the gutter it should quickly return to. The “life” went out of you a long, long time ago, didn’t it buddy?

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      • Sandy, you are a SICKO !! If you don’t have children now, please stay childless !! If not, I pray for your children !!

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      • i would like to say that love is pure and was created by God not man. we that trust Christ as our Lord and Savior believe that our worth is in Him alone. We believe that He gave all He could give so that we could be all that He created us to be. We don’t need the worlds sensual ploys to have happiness or joy. i pray that you will consider who your Creator is and pursue Him…His love is faithful and true and will not disappoint!!!

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      • Sandy if you would put your child in a thong that says “Call me” that’s up to you. I highly doubt this product appeals to most parents.

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      • Fairly certain, based on the user name and the wording, that this person is being ironic. Read between the lines, don’t stop at the surface. You don’t even have to read that deeply.

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      • THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN REMOVED BY THE ADMIN. IN THE FUTURE PLEASE EMAIL REV. EVAN AT EVAN@EVANDOLIVE.COM WITH THE SUBJECT LINE “INAPPROIATE COMMENT- PLEASE REVIEW”

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      • PEOPLE, PEOPLE — DON’T FEED THE TROLLS. Seriously. You just encourage them. Ignoring them is the best thing to do. 🙂

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      • I agree with the father. There is too much smut on tv and magazines and Victoria Secrets isn’t helping. Especially when they feel the need to air their commercials. Apparently women like you don’t care if you go around behaving immoral or dressing or acting like sluts. Some people actually care about their daughters, apparently you don’t.

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      • Well Sandy, it’s nice to hear from the morally bankrupt, bad parents and those who should be sterilized before they’re allowed to pollute the gene pool and bring more delinquent children into an already overtaxed Child Protective Services system. Unfortunately, your opinion is not only worthless, but also dangerous and clearly disqualifies you from any discussion on parenting that is being had by the adults. Feel free to go back to your room, turn the volume up to ten on your iPod and continue pouting about how your life sucks and everyone else is ‘stupid’.

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      • I hope when you have children you have a girl. Good luck when your nine year old comes home pregnant and doesn’t even know who the father is because you promote being promiscuous.

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      • Hey Sandy, you have no friends so you crawl the internet for places to Troll yeah? The girl you like probably has no idea you exist and you ride the bus home alone and hide in your room playing Halo with people and pretend they are your friend even though you don’t know their real name. You suck at sports and act out in school because your dad left you at a young age. You masturbate at least twice a day because girls can’t stand to look at your acne problem. You eat lunch alone and fantasize about”getting back at the world” but in reality you’re just a punk ass son of a bitch that canteven bother to post his actual name. You wanna post troll stuff like this? Post your name and address and man up to your comments.

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      • you must have had a rough upbringing to have such poor morals. Girls would feel much better about themselves as humans and not just sex symbols. Notice how the most valuable treasures are hard to get at, like pearls in the bottom of the ocean, gold deep into the ground. A young woman should hide their most sacred body parts and save them for their one true love in order to be truly valued and not feel cheep. This new line of underwear may make money but it loses all sense of morality and sets young girls up for a lot of hurt.

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      • THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN REMOVED BY THE ADMIN. IN THE FUTURE PLEASE EMAIL REV. EVAN AT EVAN@EVANDOLIVE.COM WITH THE SUBJECT LINE “INAPPROIATE COMMENT- PLEASE REVIEW”

        DO TO THE OVERWHELMING NUMBER OF COMMENT, THE COMMENTS ARE NOT MODERATED BEFORE THEY ARE POSTED ON THE WEB.

        PLEASE REVIEW THE COMMENT POLICY

        Please stay positive with your comments. If your comment is rude, it gets deleted. If it is critical, please make it constructive.

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      • Its attitudes like yours that are the source of half the trouble in this country. Sure hope your children have more dignity and self worth than you apparently do.

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      • Wow! I feel incredibly sad for you. I’m sure you suffer from depression as you always are seeking more in life while those around you treat you as an object. This isn’t a MORAL outrage as you see it! It’s about empowering women to be loved for the individual that they are NOT about the body they have & what it offers!

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      • Relax ppl. I dont know if any notices the name.Sandy Hook is not her or his real name. Notice they are using the name of an elementary school that just recently suffered tragedy?? Do not give this person the satisfaction of getting all worked up.

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      • sick
        i am a parent and the idea of putting such words on our middle school aged children’s under garments sickens me. i will not be shopping at Victoria secret period!!EVER!. This is highly inappropriate !.

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      • I am going to attempt to ignore what Sandy Hook wrote, as I hope it is a joke. I will follow what Victoria Secret is doing and, if they continue to go down this path, boycott them as I did with Abercrombe and Fitch, when I couldn’t even find a “gift card” for my daughter’s friends that didn’t have an incredibly sensual picture on it. Evan, thanks for “waking up” the rest of us!

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      • sandy hook really the 1 time a father stands up for his child for the whole world to see….thats ur reply …well i like what he had to say and victoria’s secret started out as just that a grown woman secret now they are tring to target our teens n younger ..NO its not right ..they dont need more money..they need to stop they got my bussiness why do they want my 11 year olds…not going to happen….and if u do have kids sandy hook…may god bless them…

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      • One sicko. Obviously this comment of yours shows exactly what kind of a person you are., So sorry you have such a warped mind.

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      • First of all Sandy, you may want to take another composition class or two. We use capital letters and punctuation to mark the beginnings and endings of sentences. It also appears that your ignorance is not only limited to grammar. Why would you encourage anyone to take part in promiscuous sex? Regardless of “moral outrage”, this is not only ignorant, but dangerous and irresponsible as well. Decreased self value, disease, and unwanted pregnancy all result from this type of behavior. Just because you didn’t have strong moral influences in your life gives you no right to bash a man that is trying to be one for his daughter.

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      • Sandy, I am only 26 years old with no children and I love Victoria’s Secret and pink but after reading this article I am disgusted that they would target that AGE with inappropriate words and thongs and I am ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED with your comment! And to the first reply to you I agree I hope you are not a parent and grow up before you do have kids!

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      • To the simple-minded people above who dont get it: Sandy Hook is obviously joking. It is called irony. If you think again, why would anyone seriously say something like that. Of course most of you would not realize the joke because of you average to below average IQs!

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      • Seriously come on… Guess u are not thinking of the guys/girls out there that are CHILD MOLESTERS.. And u must not be a christain at that either.. This world is getting worse and worse.. Also the clothing people need to think about these girls and that they dont need to dress sexy at all when they are young or have under wear being sexy either…. Guess they need to think about their own daughters.. they better be watching close cause they could get RAPED…..

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      • Not only are your words a sad commentary on you, they really reflect a lack of understanding of how “promiscuous sex” is really a symptom of poor self esteem.

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      • I am an old man with daughters and granddaughters and i’m thinking that your comment must be facetious. There is no way in hell that you could be as stupid as you sound and I mean that in the kindest way possible. I pray that you are sterile as you would be a dangerous influence on your child of either sex. Please think before you speak and people will be receptive to your comments.

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      • Sandy Hook, I’ll put this as simple as I can
        for your simple mind, a reply like your’s tells everyone you’re a SICK FUCK!

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      • Well, I’m just going to come out and say it… Sandy, your an idiot and your all that is wrong with the way parents raise children nowadays, nailed iiit!

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      • really are u making a stupid moral outrage yourself? do u have kids? if so then how about lower the age from 1st grade to 5th would u have objections about ur 5 yr old daughter being taught things of nature at the age of 7 yrs old from people who u dont know who or what they do. when it should be at 13-15 yrs old by u and ur spouse? yea right im not going to let anyone tell me how to dress my children male or female or telling me how to raise them. its up to the PARENTS!!!.not some stranger thinking its cute and making a profit on demoralizing or forcing a sexist view on kids!!

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      • Sandy, you are so intolerant. I’m sure you would agree that unwanted pregnancies, STDs, a young girl having to take care of a baby, or, some girls with a conscience who have abortions are haunted by it for the rest of their lives. Sandy, you don’t want this world to be a better place. You just like to live in rebellion.

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      • Sandy Hook? Clever. You are obviously either Satan or a pedophile. Satan hates human beings, so I am guessing you are both satanic and a pedophile. The pornification of young girls is sickening. It’s equally gross to see women of any age walking around with the word PINK on the back of their yoga pants. It’s amazing that women don’t understand what this means and what it shouts to men. Do you not know the Aerosmith song Pink? It refers to the color of a woman’s most private attribute and nothing else. No ambiguity here. Placing it on the backs of women’s pants, shorts or underwear is the same as a bullseye. Get a clue, women. Don’t be objectified. Where is NOW on this? Victoria Secret targeting children to bring future customers into the fold is crass commercialism. I won’t ever shop there again. I hate their bras anyway.

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      • Man not only does he/she say deplorable things but using a name like that shows his/her lack of character. Somehow I doubt the parents who lost children on that December day wouldn’t find this humorous. Nor do I. It’s not funny to use that name. It’s not funny to say what you said. That is not humorous. Perhaps you should invest in an education and show some class and human kindness.

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      • Wow Sandy aren’t you clueless. I have a 17 year old daughter and I don’t want her wearing crap like that and I totally agree with this letter especially with the words “feeling lucky” written across the crotch. To me and probably every other decent parent out there it is conceived as advertising to young girls/guys. I certainly wouldn’t have wanted my daughter to have sex in middle school. It’s my morals and better judgment that allows me to admit that my daughter is a junior in high school and I am not a grandma.

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      • Sandy your a effin idiot! I have 2 girls and wouldn’t want them to grow up to be trash such as yourself! I wont buy them inappropriate under garments especially from a lingerie store they get normal clothes and some brand name stuff but normal underwear. When they are adults they can buy whatever makes them comfortable.

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      • My prayers are with you Sandy. Did you know that God loves you with an unconditional love? A love that is pure and unchanging and His desire for you is that you would come to Him on your knees and give your heart to Him. Your life would change in that moment and you would never be the same. We all have a purpose in this life and I believe a great part of that is to uplift, encourage and try to win lost souls to Jesus. I will not judge you, lest I be judged but what I will do is pray for you. I am praying too, that God will place someone in your path who will share the love of Jesus in a way that you will not be able to deny that God sent them and you will have ears to hear and eyes to see. May God turn your heart toward Him and may your life be forever changed and blessings abound. He is your Heavenly Daddy. Allow Him into your life.

        I might add that children are a gift from God and they should be protected, loved and raised in a Godly manner, so that they can one day raise their children in the same way. I applaud Rev. Dolive for writing his letter!!

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      • Why should any Tween or teen girl need to have something on her underwear no one should be able to see that I have a tween daughter and there is no way i would allow her to have something like that on them she is a young girl makes me sick to think that there are parents out there that would I hope to God you are not a parent

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      • Sandy I feel very sorry for you as your letter shows you have no self-esteem for yourself nor do you care about others. Praying for you.

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      • Sandy, what the hell do you know about raising a daughter? Things are tough for young girls, even when I was a teenaged girl not so long ago, I still remember the pressures of popularity and of fitting in, getting attention from that cute boy across the room, but allowing your young daughter to wear things that invite unwanted attention is way beyond acceptable, let young girls grow up at their own rate, when they are adults they can dress how they like, but as long as they are under their parents care, parents have the right, no, not just the right, but the obligation to protect their children, if it comes down to a boycott of this product line, so be it

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      • You must be a troll. No one who is capable of typing on a computer could possibly actually think this in real life.

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      • It’s not your say! He’s protected by the 1st Amendment! He knows what the morals of a young woman should be, not what society wants them to be!

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      • “You can go to college without going to high school or without a GED” No you can’t. There isn’t a single college in the country that will accept you without either a high school diploma or a G.E.D.

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      • If this is serious, you’re sick. You should not be aloud to have children in your current state of mind. Teenagers should never wear such provocative things. They’re not going to wear them so they can look at themselves. Victoria’s Secret should be ashamed of themselves for even thinking of such a thing. Money over morals. That’s what is wrong with the world. It makes me sick. You make me sick.

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      • Lol I do agree that the statement is completely vulgar but has anyone thought that “Sandy” is just a person who wants these responses, like in the movies. So someone makes an alias account just to play with people’s feelings and see how they respond.

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      • Hello Troll!

        Oh dear, it’s so wonderful when the childless comment when only the parents really should.

        Be a dear and go crawl back under your bridge!

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      • THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN REMOVED BY THE ADMIN. IN THE FUTURE PLEASE EMAIL REV. EVAN AT EVAN@EVANDOLIVE.COM WITH THE SUBJECT LINE “INAPPROIATE COMMENT- PLEASE REVIEW”

        DO TO THE OVERWHELMING NUMBER OF COMMENT, THE COMMENTS ARE NOT MODERATED BEFORE THEY ARE POSTED ON THE WEB.

        PLEASE REVIEW THE COMMENT POLICY

        Please stay positive with your comments. If your comment is rude, it gets deleted. If it is critical, please make it constructive.

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      • wile I do applaud this fathers thought I would never ask a company to change their product line to make up for my failings as a parent

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      • You are an idiot and I hope that if you had a chidl that you would teach her that her body is not for others but for the person that she ends up marrying. It has nothing to do with morals but the fact that we should teach our children to be happy with theirselves and not be a sex object.

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      • Face it. The person who calls his self Sandy Hook is probably just a 19y/o unemployed dropout who lives in his parents basement. He’s enjoying getting a rise out of everyone. Just ignore the troll and let him get back to his role playing games with his buddies.

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      • I believe Sandy has accomplished what she set out to accomplish and that is to sidetrack others from the REAL ISSUE here!!! She is entitled to her opinion, as any human being is, though I’m truly glad to see that most people do not share her feelings!!! I am in TOTAL AGREEMENT with Evan and hope that Victoria’s Secret is stopped from this appalling effort to make a profit off of young, impressionable children!!! We, as adults who still have morals, need to petition against such efforts, so that the future adults of this world do not grow up to have a complete lack of morals, which seems to be what is happening, sadly!!!

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      • I’m 20 years old, and i do not have any children. Im a young lady who loves morals. I have 5 God-Daughters and would be disgusted to know that any of them were wearing anything from Victoria Secret. A childs Childhood is only a matter of a few very short years before they are struck with the ugliness of the world. I want my beautiful girls to know they are beautiful in the eyes of God by there demeanor, not by their looks. Yes, my girls are beautiful. But Beauty and Sexy are two totally different things. So what are we to do with these little girls who see pop culture exploit sex and glamorize their personal body parts? Do we lock them in a room for the rest of their lives? Shelter them from the world totally? Absolutely not! We teach them to gaurd their hearts and eyes. We teach them God’s definition of beauty! We show them the way we as adults dress and act with propriety and modesty and show them wholesome role models. people like Jamie-Grace.. A young woman in Christian pop who has gone out of her way to show girls their worth in christ!!
        We as adults in the world are told by God to led by example. Shouldnt we too gaurd our hearts and eyes? so that our children see our efforts and follow in the footsteps of their role models?

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    • I agree i have a 3 year old grander daughter and she dose not need that kind of under garment in middle school.Let them be young as know one is going to see what there wearing under there cloths.We do not need any more teen moms.

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    • Homeschool them and chose what you expose your kids to. It worked for us and they are very socially adjusted, went to college on scholarships because of good grades and sports/music and love Jesus. Your kids will avoid many adolescent mistakes that will affect them for life. We homeschooled until high school, and by then they knew who they were and didn’t have to feel like they had to impress anyone. It worked for us and them!

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      • Although parents and teachers should work together in the education of a child, homeschooling (where children gain an education solely from parents) doesn’t often lead to the brightest future. Generally when home schooled students graduate from high school, they get the equivalent of a GED. Not saying it’s always the wrong choice, but I don’t think it’s generally the best choice. It’s wise to leave teaching up to the people who were trained and educated to do that job, not necessarily parents. You should be able to teach your children values and morals without restricting their opportunities of socialization. Not to get off topic, but I don’t think a drastic decision such as home schooling is the solution to this problem. America is a capitalist nation and companies will do what they can to make money; whether children’s minds and values are at risk or not. The main point should be to teach your children the difference between right and wrong and give them the tools with which to face the world.

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      • Edubren – you are seriously off in your understanding of homeschooling and also of what a GED represents. You can go to college without going to high school or without a GED. The GED is more difficult than the standardized exams offered in public schools.

        Most homeschooled children I’ve ever taught were the smartest – best educated kids I’d ever seen. They were very kind and very confident. Not one has ever had socialization issues. If anything, they are far more mature than their schooled counterparts.

        I am a credentialed teacher. I have left the schools to homeschool my own children because what I was seeing in the schools was not OK with me. I’m not surprised VS is approaching middle school kids. I primarily taught middle school and those kids were highly sexualized in the public schools where I taught. I was constantly telling them to put clothes on.

        I homeschool because I disapprove of the limited knowledge offered in public schools due to standardized testing. Critical thinking skills are far more important – and if they were encouraged in public schools, brainless sexualization of girls would not be happening. They don’t question it because they aren’t encouraged to question the “norm.”

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      • Limitations of socialization? Since when did we start going to public school to socialize? Equal to GED? Some one should check their facts.

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      • Edubren, you might want to do a better job learning about what homeschooling is and isn’t about and how well respected homeschoolers are out in the business world. Your thoughts on the GED part are completely wrong. Universities seek homeschoolers out (pretty sure they don’t do that for people who typically take the GED – something most homeschoolers avoid like the plague.)

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      • edubren ~ as the parent of six (so far) homeschool graduates, I can tell you that they do not receive the equivalent of a GED. My children have recieved high school diplomas and high school transcripts, from me, that have gotten them all into the colleges and universities of their choice for both undergraduate and graduate studies. I would venture to say that the law school that has consistently given my son a 4.0 GPA would not say that homeschooling was a poor choice for him nor the medical school that recently accepted my daughter. I have also heard from several college professors that they find homeschooled children to have a greater ability in writing and studying/learning in general. Just sayin’.

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      • Linda, I homeschool my children and I was homeschooled as well. Don’t listen to all the naysayers they are just ignorant to the facts. Keep up the good work!!!
        @edubren, I’m not sure where you get your pseudo facts from, but they couldn’t be more wrong! You obviously lack complete information. Homeschoolers DO NOT receive their education soleIy from their parents. You really need to learn what homeschool ACTUALLY is. I graduated from homeschool with a diploma from an accredited academy, I speak 5 languages (my kids currently are fluent in 3), I graduated from HS at the age of 15 and had the school of choice for college, I graduated with a Master’s before the age of 21, I was a business owner at the age of 18 and finished culinary school at 26. There are SO many options afforded to homeschool students that are NOT afforded to public school students. For instance, my son’s homeschool group was invited to our local aquarium to study sea life, not for one day, but for the week. When my eldest son was learning about government, we took a trip to DC. Homeschool kids get HANDS ON LEARNING for every subject, one on one attention and Universities LOVE homeschoolers as they are more disciplined, more mature and handle more responsibility without complaining and lack a sense of entitlement. Employers hire homeschoolers based on those same facts. It frustrates me, to no end, the decided ignorance people possess when it comes to home schooling. OH and by the way, homeschoolers out preform public school kids by 37% on standardized testing, and have for the last several years. I am not saying it is for everyone, or that public school kids are worse off, but let’s face it, our public school system is hurting and the dumbing down of curriculums is only hurting our students. You can find more information here http://www.homeschoolinfo.org/prosofhomeschooling.htm Educate yourself before you speak.
        P.S. I do realize that there are some people that do not take the education of their children seriously, but I think if you actually talked to a few homeschoolers whose parents DO take their education seriously, you would find, for the most part, well organized, well educated, well socialized kids that are more concerned with the future of world affairs, agriculture, matters of state, the economy and could give you more facts and figures about our history and political standing than most adults. And, that’s just the 5th graders 😉 Though…. You may be correct. They may miss out on a few things. You MIGHT have a hard time finding a homeschooler that idolizes Nikki Manaj or others of her ilk.

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      • Homeschooling is an excellent choice for some people I FULLY SUPPORT homeschooling. However, there are some people who, despite their best intentions, are simply ill-equipped, or ill-prepared to homeschool their children. Many, many homeschooled children don’t have a reading comprehension that is anywhere close to their public schooled counterparts.

        I don’t say this from some biased statistical analysis, but from my own biased experience. I have talked to youth pastors who often have to learn very quickly that they cannot call on some (often most) of their homeschooled students to read a passage for illustration, because they simply are not able to read well enough to ask them to read publically.

        As a college student, I have met many many homeschooled students who better fit the ideal homeschool product picture. They are highly intelligent, well-informed, quality conversationalists, writers, and critical thinkers. It can work, and it should really be encouraged, but people considering homeschooling need to make sure that they are self-aware enough to assess themselves and their students objectively so that they can determine if their efforts are helping their students or hindering them. People considering homeschooling their children need support and encouragement, but also guidance from friends who can also observe their children and give honest feedback. Because all too often, Homeschooling can go very very wrong for far too long and deeply hinder the student from growing up to have a productive future in this information-driven time.

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      • I just want to start by saying I applaud you for homeschooling your kids. I think homeschooling is really great if you have the time and resources to do it. 🙂 That being said, I think an important part about the article is that okay, maybe we can protect our own kids, but what about other people’s kids? What about society’s kids, who are growing up with our kids, who, with our kids, are going to be society’s next leaders? I totally agree with what the article is saying. It is most definitely important to stand up our kids self-esteem and self-worth, even (or maybe especially) if they’re not “our” kids.

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      • Edubren, I understand and agree! Unfortunately you get folks on these message boards just looking for an argument. I didnt find anything that you said derogatory about homeschooling, nor were you trying to start a new topic or argument. I do think about home schooling from time to time and for those reasons that you have stated are reasons why I pulled the trigger. Either way…….you certainly were NOT targeting the home schooled or the parents of home schooled. Just thought I would chime in here for ya. 🙂

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      • yeah… I’m 20 years old… i was homeschooled and I was forced to get a GED because colleges these days don’t accept a homeschool diploma. So homeschool your children but in the end all it gives them is heartache… Take it from someone who knows.. I’m made fun of when I’m asked where I graduated.. That’s not something I want my children to go thru when they grow up.

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      • I was home schooled up until the 9th grade and as a junior in a public school I realized I was surrounded by idiots who didn’t want to learn at all.

        When my school decided I was too stupid ( got a C in math) to take a computer class I walked out, called my mom to pick me up. As a Junior I quick school and got a GED. Went to college and test out of my first computer programming class because, well, they didn’t teach real programming. A – 4 = 4 is not programming.

        With my free time at home I messed with computers, learned an operating system called Linux which 99% of the world had no clue about in 1993. I dropped out in 1997, starting working local computer shop jobs and then in 2001 I was making $30,000 a year working with Linux, which now over 60% of the Internet runs.

        Now, in 2012, I am working for a major regional wireless phone carrier. I was hired for my experience over master degree students with no common sense.

        Homeschooling works. When your kids find a hobby, let them run with it. My parents did and I turned out ok.

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      • edubren,

        I am 25 years old. I was homeschooled most of my life (except kindergarten & 8th grade). I “dropped out”, if you can call it that, at 16, got my GED and started college on a very part-time basis while working. I started full-time at 18 and at 23, graduated cum laude with a BS in environmental science. I had tons of money in scholarships, even ended up with an almost-free ride my last year of college. I’m now married, living in a totally different state and I have a decent job (would be better if the economy wasn’t kinda crappy). Though I went the GED route, I have lots of homeschooled friends who decided to go the whole way through and get their diploma. There’s nothing wrong with either way, and I’ve never had anyone ask whether I got a GED or a diploma. It truly does not matter.

        And I really can’t stand when people mention the “socialization” issue. For one thing, school should not be about socialization, it should be about learning. If you want to socialize, do that on your own time. For another, every homeschooled kid I’ve known is very nice, usually not awkward in social situations (besides myself, but that’s another story), and much more mature than kids their own age. I still see this in myself as an adult–I tend to be much more responsible than my friends.

        Bottom line is, when you actually *know* people who are homeschooled, when you know how their lives turned out, then you can broadcast your opinion about how “unsocialized” we are and how our parents weren’t “educated” enough to teach us. I’ve met lots of public school kids and a good portion have awful grammar, can’t spell very well, and haven’t read a book they weren’t assigned in years.

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    • Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! I desire that our entire nation would once again rise up and protect our children and young people. Instead, our nation has allowed negative influences to liberally pass through our internet and airways, and through companies/advertisements such as Victoria’s Secret to our unprotected little ones and young people. I fear these influences are filling their hearts and minds with an unfulfilled purpose for their lives. Thank you again!!!!

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      • Thank you too. I agree. I can’t believe what I saw in Target the other day – a padded bra for what looked liked a 3rd or 4th grader. Really. Really what is this world coming too. No wonder men are looking at out little girls. My little girl is 22 and din’t wear her first thong until she was 21 and she only wears them under her yoga pants because underwear shows under them ( and there are no words on them).

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    • I love this!!! A friend of mine and I were just talking about this line the other day!! Way to be a great dad! Women need to grow up questioning things that matter, being brave, and learning self respect, instead of growing up trying to be sexy, submissive, and self conscious. I appreciate this so much! I will be forwarding this along.

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    • I have read most of this and I am seeing that there are a lot of God loving people out there in this crazy society!!! The starting letter from a concerned Father was very touching and near and dear to my heart. I feel the same way because I have a lovely grand-daughter that I love with all of my heart, papa does as well. When I hear things like this. it makes me sick that all of the young models for V.S. do not care about being role models for middle school aged girls!!!! I know that businesses survive by making money,,,,, duh!! But…… do they have to pray on such young girls. Dont they remember what it was like to be a young girl in middle school where you are judged due to lack of maturity,,,, by your clothing and you just know that what ever girls are seen wearing these underwear in Gym class will be so cool to the rest, even the ones who were taught the correct morals will be tempted, thats being a young teenage girl. Right? I think that our whole society in a nut shell is a terrible mess due to lack of morals, yea thats right MORALS!!!!! I`m going to make sure the best that I can that my grand-daughter is taught well that she is beautiful on her very own and does not ever have to be like anyone else, or dress like anyone else. When she is of age I know that she will make her own decisions but until then I will be doing my best as a God loving Grandma to make her want to be a lady…. we need more of those , dont ya think? Take your young daughters to church, let them learn about the Lord Jesus Christ and about what is acceptable in this life and what is not!!!! Even thought those tough teen years may bring many temptations , and she may fall a few times I am a strong believer in teaching them right and they will never forget because what you teach them now will always remain a part of them, therefore if they do stray from the right path, they will find there way back!! I will continue to pray each night for those who do not yet know the Lord and so are not teaching there children about him and the kind of lives we need to live in order to receive the wonder gift of eternal life from God!! Pray for our country those who pray, Obama is ruining her, God Bless America and our precious childrem ❤

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      • Lori, What does your hatred of President Obama have to do with this article? I love it when you religious freaks are hateful toward others. If you think Obama is responsible for what is wrong with this country you are just wrong. That is as stupid as thinking that the bible is the word of god. Religion involves the inability to distinguish fantasy from reality. The beliefs are contingent upon ancient mythology being accepted as historical fact.
        A child’s belief in the Easter bunny and in Santa Claus is acceptable but one is expected to outgrow such childish beliefs. Now, an adult who believes in God (who otherwise shares an extraordinary number of the same narrative as Santa Claus) is perfectly sane?

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    • I will be forwarding it too. I am also getting frustrated without how lax society has become with sex and perversion etc. and it’s sad to see a company as big as Victoria Secret wants to sell out children’s innocence to make a buck. That’s an epic fail x 10.

      p,s. guys ignore Sandy’s remark – some people don’t have good upbringings or sadly just lose their human conscience.

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    • Well said, Rev. Dolive! I guess my only thought is that regardless of whichever companies decide to make non-age appropriate clothing, parents ultimately have the control on what is, or isn’t allowed into their homes. It’s sad that we can’t keep kids innocent longer…

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    • You go man! We all need to get together to stop this kind of trash going on. Not enough people have complained about the commercials on tv with the sluts running around showing everything they have! There is something to be said for a little mystery, it doesn’t all have to hang out!

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    • I agree with what this father said in his letter to VS, that it is sick to go after the innocence of young ladies. But I would like to encourage him and remind him that words are life and one day his daughter does not have to “grow up and become a rebellious teenager.” We can speak words into our children lives that curse their future or bless their future. Remeber to “call those things that are not as though they were.”

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    • i doth protest. this is emotionally charged and covert drivel. there is no need to relinquish the responsibility of our children’s education, morals and self-esteem to capital advertizing. children who know they are loved,guided, respected and trusted will not be compromised if they want to follow a fashion trend, hopefully they will be guided to put other clothes on top of those panties and trainers: their foundations are much deeper and more stable.
      this patronizing plea in fact surrenders the very power to VS that it begs them to renounce.
      … and finally, feeling sexy feels good. it does not objectify us as sex objects, but affords us more power of choice.

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      • We are talking about children here, Laurie. Teenagers are impressionable and will have their self esteem influenced by pretty much anything. Who are they supposed to be “sexy” for? They are middle school children who wouldn’t naturally develop such a premature sexuality, which is obviously being imposed by the media. You must wake up to this danger for the sake of your children!

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      • I am in middle school currently, and when I see girls in the locker room with thongs or “call me” on their lacy underwear, I honestly feel bad for them. we all have our rights to fashion, but these are thirteen year old girls with underwear meant for the bedroom! And sexy undies isn’t the only thing. Media has made these girls wear heels they can’t even walk in, low-cut V-necks, and dance inappropriately at school dances. I get so uncomfortable around them and happen to wonder why they do it. But that’s not the point. What has set people off about your comment, Laurie is the fact that you said people like to feel sexy. That may be true for upper high school and over, but this line is for middle school girls. Middle school is from sixth to eight grade, meaning eleven year olds to fourteen year olds. They are not supposed to be sexy! They are supposed to be cute or pretty! Why would they need sex appeal? Who are they supposed to be appealing to? I think this father here, is very smart and knows what he’s talking about. thongs and “wild” is not meant for pre-teens.

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    • No one else should be seeing your undergarments unless you openly put them out there. Bras and underwear should make a girl or whomever feel pretty and give them a confidence boost. Having words on your butt underneath your clothes does now make you a whore or a slut, because no one should see it if you don’t want them too. And if you want them to see, AWESOME, because you feel confident enough to show everyone, not because you want to sleep with everyone. No more slut shaming.

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      • There’s a difference between pretty underwear & having things like ‘call me’ emblazoned on your butt when you’re 13. Girls change clothes for gym class, so the entire female portion of the class would be seeing them. An innocent girl could get a not-so-innocent reputation from that type of underweard…the other girls would talk to the boys…on & on it goes. It is shameful.

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    • WOW….. I pray that VS does take this seriously and reconsider this line. We need to advocate for and protect our young girls.

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    • SO WILL I…..I CANNOT IN THE FIRST PLACE EVEN THINK THAT VICTORIA’S SECRET WANTS TO MAKE *MORE* MONEY USING THONGS THAT SAY *CALL ME*……WE SHOULD BOYCOTT VS FOR DOING THIS,,,,,IT IS SO SICK……TWEENS? PLEASE HELP US PARENTS OR GRAND PARENTS…..WHAT ELSE IS NEW???? SANDY HOOK CAN EVEN RESPECT THOSE POOR CHILDREN WHO WERE MURDERED,,,,HE OR SHE IS A TOTAL COWARD FOR NOT USING THEIR REAL NAME……THIS IS JUST TOO SICK,,,,,,COWARD!!!!!!!

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    • They need an age beside peoples user names.
      I am 19. My parents made me a deal. I where what i want if I buy it. I where what they want, they buy it.
      They won, I wore what they wanted because cloths are expensive.
      They didn’t tell me how to dress. or how not to, they just simply let me know if i want to buy my own cloths that was great, But that is the same day they don’t have to anymore.

      I enjoy watching parents use the word no. Its like they think running their kids life makes them a better parent. If your kid wants to buy a bra from “Victoria’s Secret” then let them, Because if you say no, the’ll just want it even more.

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      • You are 19? You can’t even spell correctly. Maybe your parents should have ensured that you received a decent education.

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      • Hello Katie!! Middle school age is 11 to 13 years old…Parents shouldnt have to say NO to a thong that says Call Me…Victoria Secret should have the morals to not make one! What is the age of statutory rape in your state?

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      • Katie, You are so young. You still sting from perceived injustices done to you by your parents (“running your life” ie… not letting you have what ever you wanted, not letting you stay out as late as others, judging your friends when they don’t even KNOW them, etc.) If you ever have a girl of your own, it only takes seeing what the world does to her self esteem combined with the poor decision making skills of adolescents to make you shudder, hover over them and try your best to protect them from the world and themselves. Age and experience will change your mind, and when you are 30 (even 25) you will look back at comments like this and say ” I was SOOO stupid when I was 19.”

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      • Dawn, you should be ashamed of yourself, picking on Katie. She’s made a good point. My daughters are very young – 10 and 8 – but I already teach them to make their own decisions on a lot of things. I also teach them that it’s OK to care about their appearances, but not to base their entire worth on their clothes. All that will help them make good decisions on what they wear. However, I DO think that VS needs to rethink their marketing. (However, Katie, I also think that, at 19, you should be buying your own clothes.)

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      • Most parents, Katie … lessen the strings a little bit at a time in different areas at different ages. Your parents probably didnt make that deal with you until you were older than 13 years old. This line is geared toward 10-13 year olds. I agree that they are not appropriate for that age. I personally do not have children yet, but when I do, boy or girl, I shall make sure that they dress age appropriate as long as they are under my roof. Victoria Secret is making this line just to make money, not thinking about how it is going to have long term effects on society.I do not agree with them making this line. However, It will be my job as a parent to teach my children what is right and what is wrong in the world around them. I will not hide my kids in a hole but I will educate them on why it isnt appropriate.

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      • Yes Dawn, Katie could improve her spelling, but have you noticed the rest of the grammatical errors and lack of proper punctuation in many of the other replies?
        Society would be much better off without “spellcheck” programs and by simply proofreading their comments before posting. I hate to think we have no time for such a basic task.

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      • They also need a schooling level then. This was not about a bra but underwear that promotes the sexualization of pre-teen girls. I assume you are not a parent and so probably do not yet imagine what it will be like to have a daughter who might want to brazenly display her sexuality at a young age and be encouraged by the media to do so. It’s not something those of us with young daughters can stomach easily. Also, please proofread before posting an argument if you would like to be taken seriously. I believe you were looking for the words wear, clothes, and ruining. Oh and 23… if it matters.

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      • too bad they hadn’t taught you how to spell “wear” as in put on ! not “where” as in location!
        And they didn’t have to “win” as you put it .. there are part-time jobs for young people ! You choose not to pursue one

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      • Katie, when I was a teen my parents were VERY controlling. I hated and resented it. But now at 32 I am a mom and I see that my parents were protecting me from all the harmful things out there in the world. And I know I will be just as protective of my kids. There is no reason for a 13 year old to be wearing a thong in the first place but especially not with a suggestive invitation on it. When you’re a mom you’ll finally “get it”. I hope. Or else your daughter will probably end up on Maury.

        K.C. I can’t stand people who sanctimoniously tell others to be “ashamed of” themselves. Get over yourself dear.

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      • Oh hell no, DL. WEARING THINGS THAT MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD DOES NOT EQUAL RAPE. Wearing a short skirt is not permission for fu***** rape. NOTHING IS PERMISSION FOR RAPE. RAPE IS NOT OKAY. RAPE IS NOT OKAY NO MATTER WHAT YOU WEAR. WEARING A SHORT SKIRT DOESN”T MAKE A HIGHER RISK FOR RAPE. WEARING LACY THONGS DOES NOT MAKE RAPE OKAY; THAT IS NOT PERMISSION FOR RAPE. People in long dresses get raped, people in t-shirts and jeans get raped. The clothes you wear do NOT give ANYONE permission to rape you. RAPE IS NOT OKAY. Wearing undergarments that make YOU feel nice is NOT PERMISSION FOR RAPE.

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      • First of all I agree Victoria secret is way out of line. In no way should they promote sexuality at such a young age… Personally I think 15-16 is still too young because hormone driven teenagers are morons. I am 20, not a mom, went to a catholic grade/middle school and a public high school and am currently in college. Secondly Katie your parents were right to make the deal because it showed (no offense) you didn’t have the maturity to get a job and buy the clothes on your own, which is good because you still needed their input. Thirdly, to the person that freaked out on the word rape, usually people don’t ask for rape, it’s mostly caused by someone who sees something that excites them and then tries to control it sexually do to that persons urges, lack of control, or just overall dominance personality disorder. So yes a skirt or bra or showing to much can invite unwanted attention and could possibly lead to rape… Is it guaranteed… No… Does it happen… Yes… Choices could be made that can lead to different outcomes, but I Also think that just because you don’t want your daughters dressing like sluts, doesn’t mean they can’t be allowed to dress up nice, jus respectively, even some makeup can be allowed, but don’t shelter them and if they ever ask why they can’t wear the indecent stuff, be real with them. Let them know its inappropriate and teach them how to pick out appropriate stuff that way they don’t end up like what Katie would have been had her parents not banked on the fact she wouldn’t be driven enough to pay for her own clothes. Lastly Katie spelling means everything, work on it. 🙂

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      • Hi Katie… I’m Katie 🙂 and I’m 21

        It’s odd to think that I would’ve posted the exact thing you did just two years ago, but your view is slightly biased right now. Living away from my parents gave me a perspective of what all they were doing for me. They weren’t trying to run my life, they were just trying to teach me life lessons without me getting too hurt.
        My mother actually gave in and let me buy super short shorts and tight shirts by the end of high school, and honestly I’m really embarrassed by it all now. In college, the girls who dress like that are the girls who are focused on their looks and getting boys. I turned out to be someone who cared more about my education and my future… and I learned quickly what type of boys I attracted with those outfits, therefore I avoid wearing that. In high school, I saw those pictures and I wanted to be them but now I see right through them.

        It’s odd what two years will do to a perspective.

        It’s a shame that girls in middle school will have even more societal pressures on them… The idea of being skinny and pretty was a new thing to me in 6th grade, but I was still mostly concerned with how to make the top volleyball team. I can’t imagine how stressed I would be if I had to worry about wearing sexy underwear as well.

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  3. Unfortunately it was fellow parents, moms, that created the market for this in the first place. If “corporate folk” hadn’t seen mom taking her pre-teen daughter to Victoria Secret to on a daily basis I doubt the idea and execution of the line would have happen, but wanna-be-cool-to-their-daughter-moms put the idea out there simply by their own mother – daughter shopping habits.

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    • Amanda,
      I agree with this letter whole heatedly!!
      On the other hand, I don’t agree with you! I allow my daughter to purchase her PLAIN tan, white, & black bras there. They hold up longer & fit better than a plain discount store bra. I also let her purchase plain colored panties there. They have some that are no line, no slip panties! No, she is not buying lace thongs etc. So…. just because we are in there doesn’t mean that I am trying to be the cool mom or allow my daughter to dress inappropriately. If I go into the grocery store and they sell beer,wine,& cigarettes… it doesn’t mean I’m purchasing them for my daughter nor myself. I can be buying just groceries.

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      • I see your predicament–Gap Body is a great alternative. Quality undergarments without the merchandising of women’s bodies. They offer basic colors and fits for younger girls (I started wearing it in middle school) and then more mature styles for young women (I’m now 22), but never advertise or speak to women in a degrading or objectifying manner. I hate going into VS and even walking by it at the mall because it’s so sleazy; Gap is a really great alternative if you’re looking for a more quality product than big box stores (however, Target’s Gilligan & O’Malley is nicer than you’d expect).

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      • Perfectly said Lisa H.!! I was very annoyed with Amanda’s judgmental reply!! You said EXACTLY what I was thinking! I too shop at VS for and with my daughter, it’s one of the only places I can find anything to fit her “right.” Thank you again.

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      • Well said! Why isn’t anyone pointing out the obvious? If you don’t want your daughter wearing those things, don’t buy them. Furthermore not buying these things will send a better message to the company that is here to make money than a letter will.

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      • As it is the parents responsibility to support their daughters to not wear the things that VS is promoting, it’s the idea of what VS are giving them is the problem. You may have responsible parents that tell their girls that they can not have the bra or underpants that they want, but some irresponsible parent , somewhere, will allow theirs. Because this one girl has this special bra or underwear (that is for their age group) that makes her more “mature” than the others, it will make the girls around that one want that bra or pantie. Where in your example you say ” If I go into the grocery store and they sell beer,wine,& cigarettes… it doesn’t mean I’m purchasing them for my daughter nor myself. I can be buying just groceries”, yes this is true, but they are also not promoting those products to children (not anymore). Yes, they may see it on the television, but not promoting it to them directly. They will think it is societies norm for girls their age (12 or 13-17) to have those things, and with how some think, why should they listen to their boring parents on how they should dress when it’s cool to have those lacy bras or panties.

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      • I just don’t understand how underwear are inappropriate.. You know places like walmart and other similar stores sell underwear that have words printed on them as well. Have you written to them? I feel like you problem lies with weather your children are showing these underwear to someone while wearing them. Of course I
        d never buy a middle school aged child thongs, but all victorias secret is doing is trying to make money.

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      • I don’t quite understand a problem here.. They’re underwear. The problem is not what someone wears or buys, it’s why. I certainly hope your children are not looking to buy these types of lacy bras and underwear in order to impress someone they are sleeping with. Nothing to do with bad parenting. Everything to do with over sensitivity and people thinking that they are the supreme know it all..

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      • Thank you, Amanda. I was in a college poetry writing class last year with a girl who wrote a poem about how humiliated she was to shop at VS with her mom as a teen; she was just developing and couldn’t help but compare herself to the posters and mannequins. This can avoided completely by shopping online, or shopping for undergarments without her. Our teen daughters actually don’t like to go into VS because of the marketing. They don’t want to see women in their undergarments because they know it is objectification. There are some girls at school who wear VS, but our girls won’t wear it because they feel that it isn’t appropriate for their age group; they recognize that the store screams sex.

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      • alicia, they still market drugs/alcohol/cigarettes to kids… it’s called video games… they may have to be 17+ to rent/buy it, but that doesn’t stop them from getting it… the sad part for that, is it is the parents who get the games for them, mixed with the parents being unaware of who their kids are hanging out with… but the ads and marketing towards kids is still there, and directly… ultimately it is the parents responsibility, but the way society is set up, it makes it very difficult for parents to constantly keep tabs on their kids…

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      • alicia, they still market drugs/alcohol/cigarettes to kids… it’s called video games… they may have to be 17+ to rent/buy it, but that doesn’t stop them from getting it… the sad part for that, is it is the parents who get the games for them, mixed with the parents being unaware of who their kids are hanging out with… but the ads and marketing towards kids is still there, and directly… ultimately it is the parents responsibility, but the way society is set up, it makes it very difficult for parents to constantly keep tabs on their kids…

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      • I actually don’t believe their product is better. I have gotten a few gift cards there & bought bras. I could’ve done better with a playtex or other brand at an affordable dept. store. VS is poor quality & fit.

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      • Very well said Lisa H! If people don’t like the place then don’t go there. Some of my daughters under garments can only be found at VS.

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      • They also have awesome lotions. =) I agree that VS has their merits. I personally started shopping at VS because I could get quality bras that FIT. Try finding a 32 B in Walmart, Target, or even a department store like JCP. Just not going to happen, or at least very, VERY rarely in the dept. stores. VS has bras of all (at least most) sizes, and they have practical, modest (lady-like, if you wish) options too.

        I am also a mom of three young girls (6, 4, 2), and I also agree with this letter and proud of the father that wrote it. I am very worried about all the junk out there bombarding/stripping the perceived worth of my daughters and girls in general–even my 6 year old isn’t too young to take notice. As a grown woman, even not considering my girls, I have a hard time watching VS commercials. (Anyone noticed some Carl’s Jr. ‘beach’ commercials too? Discusting!)

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    • Amanda Moran has a whole lot of it right. Young kids would not have the money to buy this stuff anyhow if the parents didn’t give them the money or buy the items. Victoria is out to make money. Parents need to do a better job of parenting.

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      • When a child is in school from 730am to 3pm, 5 days a week, there is no “parenting” between those hours. There are just children who are easily influenced, eagerly curious, and impressionable. Yes, a parent has a majority of the responsibility of how their little girl should view herself, and should teach what beauty and social acceptance should be valued as. But if VS didn’t make the line, then those girls wouldn’t have to make the decision of what is appropriate and what is not; the temptation / curiosity / social pressure would not exist. If you raised your child in a place where there were no cigarettes / alcohol / fast food, then there would be no option to “choose” either or; your child would just grow up living a healthy life. VS is a HUGE company. Not designing a promiscuous line aimed towards young girls would not anger or disappoint anyone. Maybe instead, make a line that is online only that you can customize with different words or phrases. No parent is going to design and purchase underwear for their child that say “call me” on it.

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      • Have you worked at a mall in the last 5 years? Girls that age have babysitting jobs and birthday presents. They ride the bus to the mall to hang out with thier friends, without their parents. They buy things that they want and hide them from their parents. Unless the child is placed in a bubble, parents with the best intentions and pretty darn good parenting skills will still raise a child who wants to fit in with her friends.

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      • I agree that parents set the tone. My daughter never asked to wear provocative lingerie or two piece bathing suits because she never saw me wearing that. Her dad gave her self worth by not only praising her outer beauty, but her inner beauty as well. He told her she was smart, she was a Godly woman, she was funny and sweet. When she looked for a husband, she looked for a man who valued those qualities in her. A generation of sexualized young women will be burned out and used up by the time they reach their 30’s.

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    • Amanda, I take my daughter to Victoria’s Secret simply because they have quality bras that I can get at a decent price. I only buy her the soft cotton bras as they are comfortable and she hates wearing bras due to the fact that most of them are uncomfortable . I would never buy her something with lace or with a pedophile-like saying. It is still on the corporation as we should be able to have appropriate choices for our daughters without having someone push inappropriate choices in our face. To me, this is just fueling pedophilia as a giant corporation is saying that it is okay for girls to advertise their sexuality, or lack-there-of. Fortunately, because I am raising my daughter correctly, she makes fun of those underwear and cannot imagine why someone would want to wear them…yes, she knows girls her age who already own a pair or two. However, I will not be going to Victoria’s Secret if they do come out with this disgusting line aimed at preteens and teens. I am thankful that this wonderful father brought this to my attention. Go ahead and do it Victoria’s Secret and I guarantee that I will make everyone I know aware of this perversion and urge them to pass the word.

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    • Not entirely true. Media are trying their best to find out about teen culture, package it, magnify certain aspects they think will sell, and sell it back to them under the pretense: “This is YOUR culture.” Everyone buys into it, even clothing stores.. Folks, what we see on TV…the trash, the sex, the disrespect, the entitlement…is a hyper-magnification of teen culture and is pushing stuff to an extreme. It is not real!

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    • Amanda,

      You are so right about the “wanna be cool” Moms. There are just too many of them around…granted that not every Mom that takes her daughter to VS is trying to rush along their maturity. The fact is that any mother that buys this underwear is clearly telling her daughter that she needs these items to attract attention. Who is it that they want to read these messages? You don’t put up a billboard unless you have something to sell…or give away.

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  5. Marlys, I would strongly suggest that you refrain from connecting a girl’s undergarments or appearance with the horrible acts of rape and prostitution. Your comment disturbs me because it suggests the possibility that girls and women are somehow responsible for these atrocious acts committed against them. It follows a similar line of thought: “Well, she dressed provocatively, so she must have wanted/deserved the attention/crime.”

    This kind of cultural thinking leads girls, boys, men, and women into hiding in shame and fear when they have survived such crimes. This kind of thinking has to change in our world. Please, please think before you connect anyone’s appearance with crimes committed against them. Our culture has to radically change its view on such things.

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    • So by your way of thinking, only men should be held accountable for their actions. It is perfectly fine for girls to flaunt it, tease them and tempt them. I agree boys should be taught to respect girls and treat them as equals. But that in itself does demand that the girls be held accountable for their actions. If you dress to be sexy, then you will be revered as a sex object, thus inticing sexual behavior. If she dressed provocatively, then yes she did want the attention, why else would she dress that way? No one wants the crime, but there are criminals out there and they do not care what you think. If you put a million dollars out in the open. Sooner or later a theif is going to try to steal it. By your train of thought it is the theifs fault and only the thiefs fault. There is an extreme lack of accountability in this world and your perspectives just encourages it.

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      • This is the line of thought that puts blame on women. Rape is not about sex, it’s about power. If a woman decides to “flaunt it” that doesn’t mean that she is a tease or a temptress. And it certainly does not mean she is inviting any asshole to come up to her and force her into sex. It is not enticing sexual behavior, either. People should be responsible for their actions. “She tempted me” is not an excuse. “Her dress was short” is not an excuse. “She was showing clevage” is not an excuse. If someone chooses to highlight a body part they like about themselves, it has no bearing on their intentions or what they “deserve.” If I want to look sexy on a date out with my husband, I will and it most certainly does not mean I want jerks to come up and talk to me/touch me/have sex with me.

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      • THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN REMOVED BY THE ADMIN. IN THE FUTURE PLEASE EMAIL REV. EVAN AT EVAN@EVANDOLIVE.COM WITH THE SUBJECT LINE “ INAPPROPRIATE COMMENT- PLEASE REVIEW”

        DO TO THE OVERWHELMING NUMBER OF COMMENT, THE COMMENTS ARE NOT MODERATED BEFORE THEY ARE POSTED ON THE WEB.

        PLEASE REVIEW THE COMMENT POLICY

        Please stay positive with your comments. If your comment is rude, it gets deleted. If it is critical, please make it constructive.

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    • He’s not saying that at all TKP. There should never be any connection to a sexual act involving children and that is apparently what this line of clothing does. If any one said “she was asking for it” of a young girl then it is their thinking that is twisted. We need to protect our up and coming generation from the moral pervesions in this world any way we can.

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      • Marlys (not Evan) was in fact making the connection between dress and crime (Marlys’s comment has apparently since been deleted) as MDB is as well making that connection between dress and crime (see below), when MDB writes “WE CAN provoke these crimes by our apparel. Ask criminals. No, it does not justify the crimes but changing our provocative dress can deter it tremendously.” When you write, “If any one said ‘she was asking for it’ of a young girl then it is their thinking that is twisted, ” – I couldn’t agree more.

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      • “There should never be any connection to a sexual act involving children and that is apparently what this line of clothing does. ” JMS, this quote from you sums it up perfectly!!

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    • Strongly disagreeing with your take on this letter. It is the parent’s responsibility to instill those values in their child that are worthwhile, and something the girl or boy will feel proud of. This letter is not about suggesting that it’s the “child’s” fault for despicable events to happen in their lives, but what a young girl sees as a push into being provocative and suggestive … why would a girl or boy in young adolescence even have to think about whether something is provocative or suggestive of sexual activity? TKP, I consider you and those of the same mind are a problem in our society that has lost it’s values and has no idea what is important, fleeting, or irresponsible. If it feels good .. do it? That’s irresponsible!

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      • As an early childhood teacher, minister, and advocate for girls and women I believe you have harshly misjudged my words–that were directed at MARLYS, not Evan–as was evident when I began my original post. I would beseech you to think before you write and hide behind the anonymity of the Internet.

        I wholeheartedly agree that parents are responsible for the values they instill, and for protecting their precious children against the over-sexualization that we are all bombarded with on a regular basis. This Victoria’s Secret exploit is just another disgusting way to bombard our culture with the objectification of girls at younger and younger ages.

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    • Our country must radically change its views to realize that WE CAN provoke these crimes by our apparel. Ask criminals. No, it does not justify the crimes but changing our provocative dress can deter it tremendously.

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      • Personally, I disagree wholeheartedly with your opinion. We do not provoke these kinds of crimes such as rape and sexual abuse. Those crimes are caused because of the want for power and control over the woman/girl. What I understand from your comment is that you are saying that if we would dress less provocatively, we’d reduce the frequency of these crimes. You forgot to mention that harmless Down Syndrome girl who was raped. That was her fault, since she obviously dressed so provocatively. Don’t forget about that little 4-year-old girl who was sexually abused by her awful uncle; that was most definetely her fault. Unless you’ve studied every single rape and sexual abuse case, you should not generalize them all into the same category.

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      • So you’re saying that me as a ten year old provoked my stepfather into raping and molesting myself and my younger sister for two years based on clothing choices? I remember being a kid and wearing simple shorts and a tank top when it was over ninety degrees, would that be considered provocative? I call BS on that. If clothes provoke rape, than spoons provoke obesity. A woman, no matter how she dresses does not deserve to be violated in the most personal way. You are doing nothing more than making a piss poor excuse for filthy pedophiles and men with no moral compass. Shame on you.

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      • A lot of parents today would have been young adults during the sexual revolution. At that time they would have been disgusted by one piece bathing suits, and long dresses. Maybe it’s time to return to more conservative dress?

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      • Criminals will say anything to shift the blame. Modest clothing choices don’t deter rape or assault. Don’t blame the victims.

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  7. I enjoyed reading your article, and you have some really awesome points, and I agree to a point. Being a mother of a daughter myself, I find that the responsibility of the things your talking about such as self esteem, where they will go to school, self worth etc….start and finish with ME her parent… I don’t relay on the tabloids, magazines, or TV to define that for my daughter, I as her parent will do that by my teaching and reassurance of her self worth. I have instill values, respect and dignity into our daughter and with that, then she goes forward to make her own choices, but with those common threads I know that she will move forward with making the right decisions. We as parents need to STOP blaming all the things that are wrong in our society as to why our children turn out the way that they do, we need to start looking at our selves, homes and our values for that. WE will never get away from the provocativeness of what sales and we know it’s all SEX, but what we can do is teach our children Sons and Daughters the difference between love and lust, and the importance of Love and Respect, and that all starts with US…

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    • Evan, I am so proud of you. Thank you for putting into words what so many of us as christians believe. I know the Lord is working through you as a caring dad.

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      • GRANDMA IS RIGHT & AS ANOTHER GRANDMA IT IS VERY SAD WHAT THE VALUES OF THIS COUNTRY HAS COME TO. GOD IS NOT PLEASED @ ALL WITH PEOPLE THAT DON’T USE THE BRAINS THAT HE GAVE THEM….THIS GRANDMA HAS NEVER BEEN IN A VICTORIA SECRET STORE & DON’T INTEND TO. LEAVE OUR CHILDREN ALONE. MOTHERS, DON’T GO THERE. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE TO TEACH YOUR DAUGHTERS TO BE MODEST & TO DRESS LIKE YOUNG LADIES.

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    • Motheroffive- What you say hold’s true IF and only IF we are assuming all girls have strong role models at home who care about these things and teach them self respect. I wasn’t so lucky. I did look to the outside world because no one taught me what good attention verses bad attention was. In that case, yes, it is absolutely still the parent’s lack of parenting that is to blame but are we as a society to say “Sorry you got a raw deal in the parent department kid. Tough luck “? I looked at VS and saw how boys my age ogled those women. I wanted some kind of attention and it led me down a road I wish I had not gone down. That being said, I think yes, if we care about the future of our culture outside of our own bubble what goes on in stores like these, or music or TV absolutely does matter.

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      • Thank you masons mommy and Evan for your post and letter.
        FIRST we should be encouraging our children to be children, It’s a shame that parents and society seem to want the little ones to rush thru childhood. I’ve worked in retail and see 5 yr olds with cell phones, wearing makeup (and not play makeup), buying bras and wanting their words (to look sexy). This saddens me beyond belief, I heard a little girl around 3 one day saying look at my sexy legs. Three years old, should be interested in tea sets, baby dolls, chase, riding trikes.
        The other thing that is terrible is the violent, bloody video games the little ones are playing. I blame this in part for so many kids killing others. This is what should be banned. Let out children be children, they’ll be adults soon enough and as we all know you can’t go back in time and undo things. So lets enjoy them at their age.
        To the ones that says its parents fault, I say vs and violent game developers, should have better morals as adults and parents themselves than to put temptation out there on the market.
        We as a community should be raising our children, looking out for them, protecting them.
        I have a large family and I’m extremely proud of my oldest for not letting her 2 1/2 yr old watch bad shows on tv, even some cartoons, he’s not allowed to have toy guns, or sugar filled foods, soda, candy etc. She’s trying to guide and teach him good things before he’s exposed to this stuff. So unless you were to homeschool your kids, no TV, radio, and no outside friends then your children are exposed to this from society.

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    • I agree with you. The values instilled in young people by their PARENTS should be the first and foremost line of defense against what society and CEOs feel is appropriate for children. It is so much easier to blame someone else for our shortcomings instead of accepting responsibility for our own behavior or failings.

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    • I don’t disagree with you at all about the primary responsibilities lying with parents. HOWEVER, standing up against this sort of marketing is part of demonstrating to our daughters that this sort of thing is not only bad for her, but for all of us. To me, it’s far more damaging for grown men and boys to see this sort of product/marketing because it allows them to feel justified in objectifying young girls even earlier. And, while I HOPE my kiddo goes out into the world and makes good, thoughtful, confident decisions, I know that she won’t always do that. She will bend, she will experiment, she will break rules. That’s all fine. But, at some point our influence ends and other less-attractive and provocative influences step in. While VS has a right to market whatever they want, we have an obligation to keep the pressure on them (and Abercrombe and American Eagle and all the other provocateurs of teen fashion boundary-pushing) to not make it even easier for girls (AND BOYS) to accept objectifying, sexualized messages as they figure out who they want to be.

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      • Well said. We can put pressure on these businesses that are trying to make money from our kids. They can do it in a healthier way.

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      • Well said Autumn! As a mom, advocate speaker for women, and former marketing exec., I say bravo to you and masonsmom! As women, we have a responsibility to make progress in the area of self-image and self-worth for all girls and VS, to me, is doing nothing but producing child-porn products instilling in these young girls that you must be sexy even at 11 and 12 years old. Who should be reading such words on a 12 year old’s bottom? No one! And I said porn because images of these ages of girls in such undergarments is considered child-porn in most countries, not to mention similar images are often used in child sex-trafficking. I applaud this Dad for standing up for his values as a parent. Victoria’s Secret: Get appropriate or get out of the market for young girls!

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    • Everywhere you go sexy woman and sexy clothing is splattered on billboards and buses ect. ect. then they go to school and their peers (the so called cool ones) dress innapropriately, they get alot of attention from other peers and sometimes teachers. Yes, I believe it is the parents responsiblity to teach their children values and morals, but society can hinder that with all the crap they throw at them. I am thnakful that my daughter is conservative in the way she dresses, but I did homeschool her for much of her life. But not everyone has the ability to homeschool and keep their children out of mainstream society. So I dont agree that is all a parents fault, I do believe they need to take some responsiblity, But you can try and raise your children to be angels and they will rebel one way or another, I had 3 teenagers.

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  8. I am reposting to as many sites as I possibly can. It’s time companies started being more responsible rather than attempting to exploit others all for the sake of making a profit.

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    • I agree, I’m reporting to the group pages and if it makes one company change then I’m happy. But wouldn’t it be great if we the Citizens started expressing ourselves more to the companies, CEO’s, brands, & politicians. Tell them in plain English how we feel then withhold our $$ from their products so they see we are serious.

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  9. I was raised to always be modest, and to this day, I do dress modestly. The short skirts and shorts these girls wear these days makes me sick.. I don’t have a daughter but I have an adolescent son who will be 13 in May, and I am here to tell you this mother will not allow my son to date anyone who does not cover their skin with their clothes. Girls that wear clothes like this are asking for trouble, the message the boys get is,” Hey you guys look at me, see how pretty I am.” The girls are taught that this is attractive by society but really it is not. I’m not saying they are asking for a violent crime to happen to them, and I pray that that never does, but the way they dress, their body language, all that tells alot to a young man. Why do you think we have so many teen pregnancy’s now a days. Lack of parental guidance in what your children are involved in and the clothes they are wearing. Get your kids in church instead of at the mall buying hoochie momma clothes!

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    • Because women learning that they can wear what they want instead of being restricted to hiding themselves is horrible, right? Sounds like your parenting method to your son is just as destructive, letting him know that women are less worthy if they dress a different way than you do. Teenage pregnancy has nothing to do with the clothing people are wearing, but the lack of sexual education that teens are getting. If they are brought up already shaming people for how they are, that helps us go nowhere and your statements are one step away from “she’s a slut, she deserved it.” Instead of teaching young boys that girls are to blame for their sexuality, teach them that everyone has sexuality, and when it’s appropriate to act on it. Your misguided parental guidance is what’s responsible for the victim blaming rape culture that exists right now, and quite frankly, is disgusting, Rebekah. “Girls that wear clothes like this are asking for trouble.” No. Boys that are taught that girls are somehow less of a person for wearing different clothes than their conservative mothers learn that it’s okay to bully, harass and objectify them because their mothers instilled those values in them.

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    • Because women learning that they can wear what they want instead of being restricted to hiding themselves is horrible, right? Sounds like your parenting method to your son is just as destructive, letting him know that women are less worthy if they dress a different way than you do. Teenage pregnancy has nothing to do with the clothing people are wearing, but the lack of sexual education that teens are getting. If they are brought up already shaming people for how they are, that helps us go nowhere and your statements are one step away from “she’s a slut, she deserved it.” Instead of teaching young boys that girls are to blame for their sexuality, teach them that everyone has sexuality, and when it’s appropriate to act on it. Your misguided parental guidance is what’s responsible for the victim blaming rape culture that exists right now, and quite frankly, is disgusting, Rebekah. “Girls that wear clothes like this are asking for trouble.” No. Boys that are taught that girls are somehow less of a person for wearing different clothes than their conservative mothers learn that it’s okay to bully, harass and objectify them because their mothers instilled those values in them.

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      • Finally someone who makes a good point!! I think it is so crazy how parents out there shelter their kids and teach them something is just bad and they should stay away from it. There are many things in this world that can, in some way, harm anyone at any time. I think parents need to start teaching their children about the consiquences for their actions. If they wear clothes that are sexual, they will most likely be looked at as being sexual and there are consiquences that come with that. If you don’t teach you kids about the consiquences they wont know how to make their own decisions when they grow up. I don’t think you can just tell them something is bad, stay away…

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    • I think we agree on the original post–the corporate-sponsored hypersexualization of young girls is a terrible idea and this is a bad move on the part of VS.

      However, you absolutely are saying that girls dressed a certain way are asking for it, and I cannot disagree more. You said that girls dressed immodestly (by your standards) are “asking for trouble” and that “the way they dress…tells a lot to a young man.” That is classic victim blaming rhetoric. Worse yet, it communicates to young men that they do not need to treat girls well if they are dressed a certain way, since they cannot possibly be nice or pure and therefore do not deserve it. That’s a fantastic way to perpetuate rape culture. Way to do God’s work, lady.

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      • That is completely opposite of what, I believe, she is saying. By not allowing her son to date immodest girls, she’s not teaching him that it’s okay to objectify young women who dress provocatively and only girls who dress modestly deserve respect. No. Nor did she say that a girl who dresses that way is ‘asking for it’ (in fact, she explicitly said that’s not what she believes). But it’s not a new concept that a young woman who dresses modestly, thus showing respect for her body, will attract respectful men. Likewise, women/girls who dress provocatively will attract the kind of men looking for that, who in general tend not to be so respectful. (A rapist won’t care either way. They simply look for easy victims.) The immodest one may not be ‘looking’ for sexual attention, but she will get it. Is she asking to be raped? No. But a lot of the men she attracts will be the men who are, in the end, looking for that one thing. Are all immodest women hoochies? Certainly not. There are plenty of kind, virtuous (in the sense that, regardless of how they’re dressed, they’re not going ‘give it up’) young women, who will grow into well-adjusted, self-respecting women, but who at their young age will find a way to push the modesty boundary while still in their parents’ home. But this mother is teaching her son not to give into that ‘rebellion.’ She’s teaching him what a self-respecting young woman with high moral standards looks like. She teaching him that it’s important to be modest and to value modesty. She’s teaching him to encourage modesty in his female peers. Certainly, more girls would think twice about what their parents are trying to teach them about modesty if more boys were not allowed, or not willing (which should be the ultimate goal), to date immodest young women.

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    • So girls that don’t dress “modestly” such as yourself are asking for trouble? Who are you to judge just because someone is not going to dress like you and go to church? Short skirts and shirts have been around for a very long time and not just a trend that has started “these days”

      I find it sickening that you believe girls who “wear clothes like this” are basically asking young men to commit violent crimes against them. I guess if we all just went to church and and dressed modestly like yourself, there were would be no teen pregnancy’s or violent crimes against women.

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      • “Who are you to judge just because someone is not going to dress like you and go to church?”
        Maybe we should say the same things about robbers and murderers. People shouldn’t judge murderers, because, who are they to say that just because they don’t have the same morals as you?
        “Short skirts and shirts have been around for a very long time” Is a long time around 70 years? Around 1910, people wore full-length dresses to swim in because otherwise, it was immodest. You’d be called the equivalent of a whore if you showed your calves or thighs in the 19th Century. There were low cut tops, although I think it’s a bit different as breasts weren’t considered as sexual back then. I’d also like to mention that the percentage of the population with STDs has gone up considerably since the 1960’s. I don’t know for sure if that is correlated with more revealing clothing, but it’s definitely something to consider.

        Whether you find her beliefs “sickening” or not isn’t my concern, but I think you’re being rather aggressive to someone who simply posted their opinion. After all, who are you to judge just because she dresses modestly and goes to church?

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    • Perhaps you should find someone else to teach your son grammar as well as how to respect women regardless of what clothes they choose to wear. Clearly you have no grasp of either.
      *a lot*
      *pregnancies*

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    • I don’t think that a girl that dresses ‘provocatively’ is “asking for trouble” or “asking for a violent crime to happen to them”. That is part of our society’s ‘rape’ culture by blaming victims for crimes. I agree that Victoria’s Secret shouldn’t be promoting sex to young girls, but that is different than a any woman ‘asking to get raped’ because of what she is wearing. I assure you, what a woman wears seldom has much to do with if she is raped or not.

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    • That backwards thinking encourages and perpetuates rape culture. How about teaching the boys to act and think like decent human beings and stop slut shaming young girls?

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    • Perhaps rather than telling your son he can’t date girls that don’t “cover up” you could simply teach him to respect women regardless of what they are wearing and that clothing is not a sign that someone is “asking for trouble”.

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    • Teen pregnancy in the US and Canada is currently at an all time low. When were the highest rates? The 1950’s. Yes. When everything was about church, modesty, and repression.

      Rates of rape in the US have also decreased significantly since a high point in the 1970’s.

      You should get your facts straight. Maybe then you won’t blame the victims for perpetrating their own horrific rapes. Not one of the victims of rape asked for it, regardless of whether they were dressed modestly or not.

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  10. I believe that I have been a good caring and loving parent and have tried to teach my children right from wrong but that doesn’t mean that their own choices, just as the reverend said won’t take them away from what they have been taught. I have two children who have been raised with good teachings but the world calls louder to some of our children than others and my oldest strayed and praise God that he has come back around, but I now have a thirteen year old that the world is knocking on her door and I am struggling to help keep her focused on choosing the right, not what the world says.Yes my daughter ultimately makes the choice but life would be a whole lot easier if TV, clothing, music etc.were not so messed up! May God bless our children and soften and change the hearts of those who want to take them away from us!

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    • AMEN Motherhood. I have a teen age son….and a tween son and 2 younger daughters…..And they DO make their own choices and so on even though they have been taught. One of my children has for the entire lifespan tossed every value we try too instill right back at us, that one is different than the others in this regard….and yes this kind of advertising certainly does NOT help the situation…..sighs…..

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    • Well said Motherhood. I to have have two girls and have bought them up to dress modestly. If they want to wear the short dress and lingerie they will find a way. My daughter went to school dressed modestly and I got a call from the school on her attire. Turns out she borrowed clothes from a friend and changed in the bathroom. I agree we need to send more letters to these companies about the message they are sending to our young people. Evan I am so proud of your letter. If more parents wrote these kinds of letters I believe we can make a difference.

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  14. I have six daughters and think Victoria Secret should be kept a secret until the girls are married. Guys don’t know what is underneath unless shown. And mothers should not encourage this behavior in young teens unless they don’t mind their daughters showing.

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  15. It’s sad to say that all the V.S. people will see are the words Texas and Reverend and then discard this quickly without a thought. I’m with him though, this is a disgrace if it be true!!!

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  16. 0h my gosh, this truly is too much.
    I know this was said on behalf of his daughter and all girls but I come as a mom to a young boy. He is 10 and cute as it may be that a little girl likes him. I disagree with a girlfriend at such a young age.
    How is my son supposed to be a able to respect a young lady some day if at such a young age she is being taught that her worth is found in her undergarments? (No pun intended. I promise.) my son is the youngest of three. He has two older sisters and yes I try very hard to teach them to respect themselves so that they’re friends and future spouse will respect them.
    This is too much! vs needs to reconsider this new step. Young girls need positive reinforcement of WHO THEY ARE not what they wear or what they presumably have to offer. Whichever me tell you is nothing at such a young age and simple mentality!

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  17. I have been writing about the same thing on my blog. Perhaps if their are enough that protest we can higher more appropriate standards for our kids! Would love your feedback on my entry!!!

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  18. I have to say that I honestly do not agree with V.S. most of the time. They feel the need to plaster half naked women that are 8 feet tall on their windows in the mall where people of ALL ages are walking and enjoying family time. I try to keep my kids from walking past their windows every time. I hate when we are watching tv and then a commercial comes on with the same half naked women and we are all forced to see it. We turn the channel as quickly as possible but of course everyone has seen it. It drives me crazy!

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  19. What an amazing letter! I agree 100%! I have a 2 daughters, 20 & 14. My daughters both as soon as they needed bras wanted to shop there. I told them absolutely not!!!! First I’m not paying $50 on a bra for a teenager! I have only bought 1 bra there in my life & it didn’t last any longer than one I bought at Walmart. I applaud you sir! Wish there were more people that felt this way!

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  20. I have 3 boys and one infant daughter so I’m looking at this from all kind of perspectives. I hope I raise my sons to first off put their education first in their young years but to also keep company with modest young ladies with goals, aspirations and morals. I do pray my boys are lured by temptation from a wayward teen girl who has lost direction. And I also pray my daughter grows to be a strong young woman with conviction, principals and integrity all of which should be the basis of her relationships and not whats under her clothes. I put thought on a regular basis with how to empower my children to seek friends and circles of like minded folks to help them keep their minds pure and healthy while still maintaining fellowship and social fulfillment. Let’s pray more parents can keep this as the focus since mainstream society will sadly be traveling further down this path I’m afraid. May God help our children.

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    • I am sorry but I believe at this point, no God can help them,, with the social hierarchy and the social media pushing the mentality of looking sexy at a younger and younger age, it’s not “God”;s help that needs to stop the children from falling into the victim mindset of sexual appeal, it’s the parents’ duty to be a parent.

      VS from what I see is just following the trend because so many parents are allowing children to dress provocatively at a younger age, they want into that market.. I think it’s wrong to be like that considering VS was meant as an adult lingerie place, but parents are as much to blame for it all since the parents are letting such clothing be available.

      I raise a hand to salute the one who spoke his mind for his worry about what the future brings for raising his daughter, someone should speak up, every good parent should. I worry too many think it will go away since no one is really making enough of an impression to stop kids from the downward spiral they are going into.

      (This being said by a girl who for 6 years (I am 24 now) worked in a movie theater and watched the evolution of children and teenagers with their mentality and growing lack of respect for themselves and others. It was a horrible change to see things change so quickly in the matter of 2 years!!.)

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  22. I agree with Evan. If good parenting were all that is needed, then why bother making cigarettes and alcohol illegal for minors? I’m an elementary teacher and already peer pressure is rampant in those 4th and 5th graders.
    If mothers are making this happen because they are the ones taking their daughters to VS, then that, too, is their choice as a parent, but i don’t know any of those mothers and I don’t see a difference between that and parents who choose to allow their minors to drink at home with them. The fact that some parents choose this for their kids doesn’t mean that everyone else’s kids should have the choice to do it as well.
    I agree with David, VS should remain a secret until the girls and boys are grown up and married!

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  23. I agree 100% with you Rev. I see young elementary girls wearing sweat pants saying “hot” or “baby”. That is just not appropiate clothing for young girls to wear. I wont even let my middle school daughter wear that stuff.

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  24. Great article! I want to share a suggestion that you, as a father, can do to help your daughter navigate through these things. My dad did this and while I didn’t really like it as a teen I truly appreciate it now as an adult. Anything I bought, clothing wise, had to be shown to him. Every time I bought clothes, I had to give a “fashion show” of sorts for my dad, and sometimes my older brother. If Dad didn’t approve – the clothes had to go back to the store – even if I had used my own money. Now, my dad let me wear some goofy stuff – his concern was modesty and age appropriateness. You may already do this and if so, well done!

    Also, a friend with daughters has never let dressed them something as a toddler or preschooler that she wouldn’t want them to wear as a teenager (ie. bikini swimsuits, spaghetti strap shirts and sundresses without an undershirt or jacket, pants with words on the rear, etc).

    Just a few ideas 🙂

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    • this reminds me of my adolescent yrs.! i def. didn’t like needing to get my father’s permission to keep & wear my clothes purchases at the time, but i am so thankful now for his loving concern.

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      • While I agree that both parents should approve, I think too many dads have become pushovers. Also, the dad also the male perspective. While a mom might just think a pair of jeans are cute, he might see that they are too tight and show off her figure too much.

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    • My dad trusted my mom to know how to dress his daughters, but as a kid I had a friend whose father also had to approve everything they bought (though I never heard of him checking their underthings — that’s crossing a line IMO). My mother had great taste, dressed well (up to date but not trendy), was a good bargain shopper and was very much a lady. What does it say about your parents’ relationship that your dad didn’t defer on female matters to your mom? Do you have a husband/kids? Do you defer to him? That would bug the heck out of me.

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  25. Thank you, Reverend, for your eloquent letter to VS. I would say more, but I would end up writing my own letter. We all need to stand up and tell corporations that we are fed up with them shoving their immoral shows, billboards, apparel, music, etc., down our throats. Thank YOU for taking a stand.

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  30. All the pros and cons of these garments are pretty much true. One thing I have heard or read is that these undergarments make girls feel good about how they look to themselves and spouse or companion? But my main comment that I want to make is in regards to how girls dress these days. It is not a new trend but maybe a different style.
    When I was a teen in the 60’s girls wore mostly skirts and they were as short as they could possibly be. Along with lace stockings etc Girls that weren’t allowed to would roll their skirt up at the waist to make them as short as possible as soon as they were out of the house. Some even changed on the bus or at school. And oh how we, the guys, loved them and still do. So as disturbing as it all may be it really isn’t new but it is more noticed especially due to our modern electronic devices. Back then it was only seen by those present to the scene. Now everything is seen instantly all around the world by those who choose to look.

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    • Some people on here are way too judge mental! I shop at VS & Pink for both myself & my daughter. I will continue to do so too! Will I allow my daughter to choose a pair of underwear that has some “saying” on it, Absolutely not! She will choose what fits her best & what we both agree with. I want to know where his letter is to Justice(used to be Limited Too)?? Their underwear line is filled with pictures and sayings on the front & back!! Why is that okay, but VS having a teens line is not okay? Do I agree with what words will be put on their underwear, no. Lets focus on having that changed but keep the teens line open. Just my opinion.

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      • So you’re comfortable supporting a business that markets sex to a pre-teen? (And make no mistake, that is exactly what they are selling to get people in the doors – sex)

        If you are, fine, but that speaks more to your lack of morals than other people being “judge mental”

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      • My mom has the exact same thought train as you. And now, at 22, I still wouldn’t buy a pair of underwear that has a stupid saying on it. Maybe if it said cute, or wild, yes. But nothing like kiss this or get lucky. I feel like what is being ignored here is the plenty of other age appropriate underwear they do have. When I go in there now, my eyes don’t go right to the underwear with sayings on it, but rather the animal print or bright colored polka dotted ones.

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  31. I went to the VS website and searched for Bright Young Things. Included in the collections are no underwear at all, and none of the models look like young teenagers. It’s towels, tote bags, slouchy shirts, tank tops, shorts and bikinis that are no smaller than bikinis sold anywhere else.

    I’m all about age appropriate clothes for my girl, but in this case, I think we might be barking up the wrong tree. Now the Pink line, it has the things mentioned, but those clothes are not aimed at middle schoolers and wouldn’t fit them for the most part.

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  32. As a society, we should be sickened by this marketing strategy. Our culture places money above most everything. As consumers, we all vote everyday with the dollars we spend.

    BTW- those who are trying to practice ethical shopping would do well to avoid shopping at VS. VS made the top 5 giant companies who use slave labors. So not only do they seek to objectify women, through unethical business model and practices, they seek oppress and suppress those who make all their products— which in turn creates all their profit and wealth.

    http://www.businesspundit.com/5-giant-companies-who-use-slave-labor/?img=42008

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  33. Hi there! I actually worked at Victoria’s Secret for about 3 years and almost all of the staff working there had a problem with this. There was once an extremely vulgar panty that my manager flat out refused to put on the panty table.

    I personally didn’t even think to shop at VS until I was close to 18 years old. I think that PINK was originally supposed to be targeted towards college students but yes, unfortunately the demographic has changed.

    But I have to disagree with you. Personally, I do believe this is soley the parent’s responsibility.

    Whose money is paying for that underwear? The parents. These days 12-13 year olds are left unattended in the mall with their parents credit card. The sales associates can’t stop them from walking in or choosing specific panties.

    However I do believe that VS can step up a little and monitor the clientele a bit more.

    I once had a girl that looked barely 14 years old walking around holding our most revealing lingerie set. She asked me for a fitting room. I was literally shocked so I decided to take the matter into my own hands. I asked if she was 18 or older/ had a parent or guardian with her. She said no and I then proceded to tell her that she wasn’t allowed to try the lingerie on unless she had a parent with her. I know I kind of fibbed and made up a store policy but I’m honestly surprised that it isn’t one.

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  34. “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing” Thank you Evan Dolive, for standing up and saying this is not right.

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  36. I strongly agree with the letter! I too want my only daughter to realize her self worth will be earned from within herself as well as from her accomplishments. I have always told her she will never wear any clothing that offers herself to be viewed by others in the fashion you are suggesting. With that said…whether 17 or 10, I find such items appalling for these young girls. I honestly believe this line of clothing will send the wrong message to our future women and as if such were to develop I promise I will retract my own personal interest in your lingerie and clothing lines. Thank you Rev Evan for bringing this into sight and may all the mothers and fathers out there share our concerns! Disappointed.

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    • I agree with you rev. There is an old saying that says “it takes a whole village to raise up a real man/women”. It’s not right to think that raising kids depends solely on parents. While parents have a huge part in raising healthy kids, however you can’t deny the constant messages these kids from everywhere in society now, that speaks directly to the core of their identity. Our culture has to change. And companies have to be responsible before it’s to late to save this young generation.

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    • He’s not going to buy it and he’s telling the company why. The letter is to show them why he will no longer support their company.

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  40. I am the mom of 2 daughter who are just 5 and 3 and I am here to tell you that my girls will not be allowed to buy this kind of under garments until they can buy it for themselves. I want my daughters know they are beautiful no matter what they have on under their clothes. So well said reverend. I was raised in church and are raising my children in a Christian enivorment as well. I wished that more parents would raise their children that way as well, but that is not going to happen. So as a Christian mom my kids do not and will not wear sexy under garments with the word sexy or anything in that nature until of age. The sad part about this is that there will be parents that will buy these sexy garments for their girls. And you have to think about it a second, but who is the parent here, you or your child? So as a parent you have the responsiblility to teach your child what is right and what is wrong and guide them in the ways you want them to. So if you want to guide your daughter this way and teach her to dress this way, then be my guess. This mom will not be teaching my daughters that they are sexy. They are beautiful and they know they are and they know that dressing sexy is not the way to dress. Parents these days I don’t know about them. Thanks Victoria Secerts for making such horrible under garments for these yound girls to wear! From a dissappointed mother!

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  42. Thank you for standing up for young girls and women around the world. It means alot when men speak positivity to their children and unselfishly speak the same to the world. We live in a time where the laws, and people have forgotten the innocense of children and that there are pedophiles and people out here who yearn for these opportunities to exploit them. There wont be enough people to stop buying these type of garments. There should be laws enforced to keep corporations from targeting children (teenager). Congress needs to be made aware of VS intentions and put a stop to it in the same way that laws protect kids such as smoking, drinking, and laws that keep kids from being involved in porn. In light of the rape & sex trafficking crimes that are routinely happening in America and other places, Victoria Secret should be ashamed. Thank you for sharing and God bless.

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  43. AMEN! I am the mother of 2 boys and I want them to know the respectful way to think of women–not as thong-wearing “young things”!!!

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  44. The market is never going to change, it’s only going to get worse. Fashion needs to stay provocative in order to stay competitive. It’s the parents’ job to raise their children accordingly. If you want your daughter to make big decisions in this world, teach her, don’t try and hide her from temptations in this world. I was a middle school girl once and wanted so badly to be a victoria’s secret model and wear the provocative panties that they make. But I also made the decision at that age to take all honors classes and think about big college careers. If a girl lets silly clothing like this define her then she was obviously not taught what is important in this world. So start raising your children instead of yelling at companies for trying to make a product.

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    • If more caring parents stood up to marketing and we find a happy medium I don’t see why marketing couldn’t change. I see many companies asking for feedback. Here is our chance as the USA to make it a little better. It’s not all on parenting, marketing KNOW what they are doing. Afterall, that is why they get the big bucks. Should I say our hard earned money?

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  45. When my son was in sixth grade, one of his teachers made a comment that stuck with me. He asked the kids, “Why isn’t it called Gertrude’s Secret?”

    This comment was meant for levity, but I think clothing for the “private parts” of children should be as simple as possible. I didn’t even like those days of the week undies when I was a little girl. To rebel, I wore Sunday on Wednesday. That rebellious streak has continued and I now prefer thongs over Granny Panties or even Spanx in my elder years.

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  46. Bravo Dad! It also sends a bad message to young boys and to males in general. It feeds a predator’s imagination and adds unnecessary temptation.

    The media and manufacturers without souls have already done a number on generations of women’s self worth. Time to stop adding fuel to that fire.

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    • I had concerns about the predator aspect as well. I could see the term “bright young things” traded around in seedier places if/when this line hits the markets.

      Then too, what happens if some little girl is wearing this product and is abducted? I am NOT saying the underwear would be the cause for the abduction. I am saying it adds a much more dangerous aspect to this product line. It’s as though we as consumers would be giving all those sick people in the world permission to look by allowing this garbage on the clothes racks.

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      • I agree with you both, I left a comment below that also touches on perverts and pedophiles, as well as young guys first experiencing hormonal surges…none of them need anything else to fan their flames…

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  47. To an extent yes I get what he is saying–he doesn’t want his daughter to feel like sex is what her worth is. I buy their brightly colored lines and I’m 27 so I don’t know that getting rid of that line solves the problem (plus what 17-year-old can afford their underwear!). Teaching her worth and being a great dad will go a lot farther than worrying about panties. Sex is and will be everywhere—being open to talk about it and go in VS and tell her this is not the kind of woman you want to be (i.e. get lucky on your panties or whatever) is far more beneficial.

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  48. Although I agree with the points of this letter – it is horrible that they are marketing to younger girls, especially since the brand PINK was started with the sole intention of marketing towards college-age girls – it’s all about parenting. As a former VS employee for 2.5 years, I can say you’d be a fool to think that many middle-school age girls (and younger!) don’t already purchase the products, be that they are targeted towards them or not. I don’t agree that it’s right for VS to be doing this, however, I do think that it falls more to the parent’s responsibilities to ensure that their children aren’t there buying the scandalous stuff in the first place.

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  49. I agree with this letter! Let children be children and not little adults. With TV shows like tots & tiara’s and now VS starting this line for children that are WAY to young, parents really need to step up to the plate and say enough and let their kids be kids!!

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