A Letter to Victoria’s Secret From a Father

An open letter to Victoria’s Secret regarding their choice to make an underwear line aimed at young teenagers. (Read about it here)


Dear Victoria’s Secret,

I am a father of a three year old girl. She loves princesses, Dora the Explorer, Doc McStuffins and drawing pictures for people. Her favorite foods are peanut butter and jelly, cheese and pistachios.

Even though she is only three, as a parent I have had those thoughts of my daughter growing up and not being the little girl she is now. It is true what they say about kids, they grow up fast. No matter how hard I try I know that she will not be the little ball of energy she is now; one day she will be a rebellious teenager that will more than likely think her dad is a total goof ball and would want to distance herself from my embarrassing presence.

I know that this is far down the line and I try to spend as much time as I can with her making memories of this special time.

But as I read an article today posted on The Black Sphere, it really got me thinking that maybe the culture that we currently find ourselves in is not helping the cause.

Recently I read an article that Victoria’s Secret is launching a line of underwear and bras aimed at middle school aged children. The line will be called “Bright Young Things” and will feature ” lace black cheeksters with the word “Wild” emblazoned on them, green and white polka-dot hipsters screen printed with “Feeling Lucky?” and a lace trim thong with the words, “Call me” on the front.”

As a dad, this makes me sick.

I believe that this sends the wrong message to not only my daughter but to all young girls.
I don’t want my daughter to ever think that her self-worth and acceptance by others is based on the choice of her undergarments. I don’t want my daughter to ever think that to be popular or even attractive she has to have emblazon words on her bottom.

I want my daughter (and every girl) to be faced with tough decisions in her formative years of adolescence. Decisions like should I be a doctor or a lawyer? Should I take calculus as a junior or a senior? Do I want to go to Texas A&M or University of Texas or some Ivy League School? Should I raise awareness for slave trafficking or lack of water in developing nations? There are many, many more questions that all young women should be asking themselves… not will a boy (or girl) like me if I wear a “call me” thong?

I want my daughter to know that she is perfect the way she is; I want my daughter to know that no matter what underwear she is wearing it does not define her.

I believe that this new line “Bright Young Things” thwarts the efforts of empowering young women in this country. “Bright Young Things” gives off the message that women are sex objects. This new line promotes it at a dangerously young age.

I implore you to reconsider your decision to start this line.

By doing so you will put young girl’s self-esteem, self-worth and pride above profits.

Sincerely,

Rev. Evan Dolive
Houston, TX


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2,825 Comments

  1. Bright young things is not geared towards kids in middle school, it’s geared towards girls in their late teens early twenties. You have every right to feel how you feel but I work for Victoria’s Secret and we as a company are all about empowering women. The “feeling lucky” panties are St. Patrick’s Day panties and it is not phrased as a question and the ones that say “wild” have pictures of animals and animal prints, it’s all in how you take it….the panties are supposed to be fun not perverted

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    • Anything geared towards young adults will automatically be desired by young teens who are in a hurry to grow up. As a woman I have never felt empowered sitting in my living room watching the Victoria’s Secret fashion show full of nearly nude surgically enhanced women/teens. How is this empowering to women? I know we see large breasts barely contained in a sheer bra on TV and think – Astrophysicist! We see underwear so small we wonder how it is everything isn’t showing and think – kindergarten teacher. No there is nothing empowering about VS, its messages or products. And quite frankly I sill continue to steer my daughter away from your store. Luckily we already had the rule of no words on your behind.

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      • I totally agree with Kim. We can take our daughters shopping together–elsewhere! Hopefully they’ll be able to make their own good decisions about avoiding this store and these kinds of messages when they’re on their own, too.

        Anon, I don’t believe she meant that large-breasted women are dumb. I think the intent was that these nearly-naked women, whose sole purpose is to show off those big breasts, don’t bring to mind strong, educated women.

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    • It doesn’t matter if it geared toward late teens and early twenties. Younger girls are going to be interested in that line somehow and gearing it toward late teens does not make this any better!

      Thongs that says call me IS perverted and you guys are not empowering women. You are making them sexier and like he said it does sound like these underwear are putting a label on them as sex objects.

      Also, it doesn’t matter if feeling luck panties are st.patrick’s day underwear. Do you know why? because that’s not the only day they will be wearing those!

      What a shameful reply!

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      • Amanda I promise you your company does not gear toward making every woman special or feel good about what they wear. The reason is that your company dont have a bra to fit larger women there for when we walk into Victoria Secret with a friend then associates look at us like we are not worth to be spoke to or helpped because mind you they know they dont need to waster their time because they cant make a sale. This happens everytime I go with a friend to the point now I go to another store while they look and thats sad that a company makes someone feel like that. Victoria Secret puts “Feeling Lucky” on panties and yes they bring them out at st Pattys day but you cant honestly sit there and tell me the thought didnt run through your head. I am so glad this dad stood up for his daughters future and the future of little girls that one day will be teens. I dont care if this line is for older teenagers it is still geared for TEENAGERS. Im sorry but our nation has came to a time that they try to make our children grow up way to fast. I do know that the most part begins at home and in family time to make sure they stay little as long ass we can keep them and also to teach them the way that is right but they do go to school an everyone knows peer pressure on having certain clothing items is huge. I dont care if my child is unpopular or not I would refuse for my child to bring something like that into my home at that age. My house my rules. I am also with Jack on his comments also. Great response Jack!!! I dont see anywhere that you called big breast dumb or anything wrong with anything you said you stated the facts.

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      • Sorry, Amanda. You’re never going to convince us that VS is about making people feel good about themselves. Your store, your models and your marketing all say, “We value you if you’re young, gorgeous and sexy!” You present distorted images of women’s bodies and women’s roles in our society. (Is it any wonder that boys and men don’t have a clue what an average woman’s body should look like?) Show normal, successful, powerful women wearing your products, and you send a completely different message. As it stands, your models look like glorified strippers–and you know it.

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    • Saying that the phrase “feeling lucky” is merely a reference to St. Patrick’s day and nothing more is as naive as believing that the word “wild” is really only meant to refer to the wild nature of an animal. Also, the claim that “it’s all in how you take it” is equally naive, because anyone who sees the phrases “wild” and “feeling lucky” on an undergarment is not going to say that it’s just for “fun”, but instead, they will see that the sexual connotations of those phrases are clear as day. These phrases are being printed on female undergarments, not a themed paper plate for an 8-year-old’s birthday party. I understand that you’d want to defend the company that you work for, but let’s not be unrealistic here. Victoria’s Secret is a business, and it is a business that exists primarily to make money, not “empower women”. How do they make money? Well, in the words of Perry White in the movie, Superman Returns, three things sell papers: “Sex, tragedy, and Superman”. Now, while Superman may be nothing more than a fictional character, the truth is, Victoria’s Secret is playing on sexual connotations and sexual innuendos to sell products and make bank.

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      • I agree! I also wanted “anon” to know that big boobs do not make the IQ level go up or down. Sharing what you are wearing under your clothing and the skin not being covered up does! Women can wear what they want, I will also agree. But not even the most beautiful should share their bodies with everyone! Sorry VS you can ban negative comments, but Evan’s comments were constructive. You just don’t see what it is…

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      • Amen, Zachary! You rocked the answer, here. Just follow the money. PS is a huge corporation and sex sells. The underwear line may be geared towards older teens and younger 20-somethings, but who wants to dress like the big girls? Little girls. I hope that more dads and thinking people like yourself will speak up against this.

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    • Honestly, if you work for Victoria’s Secret, you should be aware that the company sells more than underwear. It sells a lifestyle, a set of expectations for women and girls, and precisely many of the things that this father brings up. Yes, it is “all in how you take it,” but the conclusions people jump to are not accidental.

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    • I am a girl in her early twenties, and I would never purchase any of these trashy items. regardless of who your company gears the line to (or any other line for that matter) we all know that the term “wild” on a pair of panties has nothing to do with the print. And stating that you are feeling lucky instead of asking someone if they are (especially on your panties, is probably even more trashy. Excuse it all you want, but your products and advertising, top to bottom, do nothing but depict women as sex objects and only sex objects.

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    • I strongly feel Victoria Secret is playing it both ways. Their play on words fools only those who want to believe them. There’s no way a connection between ‘wild’ or ‘feeling lucky’ printed on girl’s underwear, and young promiscuity can be missed. Open your eyes and see the truth.

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    • Also, parents: YOU’RE THE PARENT. Don’t want your 13yo daughter wearing this? Don’t allow it. Don’t buy it. Don’t give her money to shop at VS. Monitor her clothing. Geez, I never would have gotten away with this stuff. I graduated in 1986, and went to HS with two sisters who weren’t allowed to wear bikini underwear. They survived.

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      • I agree, however, most people know young children are influenced by the media in a big way, i.e., cereal and toys on Sat. morning cartoons? Amanda you should be ashamed of yourself for your statements-I know you must love your job and you probably earn a good living working for VS but please give us a break-you know darn well how those statements on the underwear will be interpreted by youngsters and everyone else. Shame shame!

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      • This is what I was thinking. To be honest I’m a big girl that had trouble looking for a bra AT Vs turns out I was looking for a wrong size. So, I have this incredibly sexy bra that when I wear it, nobody knows how sexy I am underneath but me. That’s empowers me. I also love the angels. Not all but most are genuine people.

        So, as a 28 yeah old, working woman who loves her VS… how would you allow your daughter that probably doesn’t work to purchase from them? That’s a parenting issue. If the line is promoted to older teens, early 20s that’s what they market for. Of course younger girls may want the stuff bit if they’re brought up right, they would respect their parents decision to have them not shop there.

        I get the letter, I think there’s more to consider though.

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    • Amanda, I imagine the VS corporate talk is about “empowering” women, though I am not sure what VS products intend to empower them to do. I am a husband/father/grandfather. I have a wife, two daughters and two granddaughters. If my two married daughters like VS products, and I don’t know if they do, but if they do then I am sure they may please their husbands and that is right and as it should be. However, the Bright Young Things line certainly won’t have the potential of empowering unmarried young adults and teens including some preteens. There is obviously a need for women to have underwear and it is wonderful for a wife to have attractive underwear for her and her husband to enjoy. However, in VS’s effort to sell a product I think your corporation could do a better job of empowering women to be more than sexual objects. Your corporation could go a long way in helping improve the moral and healthy image of women. That would empower women.

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    • This is exactly the problem….There is always some sort of innocent explanation to justify or rationalize behavior that is unacceptable. Our society has become more and more accepting of acts that are not currently nor have been in the past seen as acceptable. We are becoming a more perverse society and these undergarments are simply another means to get to our kids. They are fun and lighthearted!!! Garbage! From a guy’s perspective and also a father’s perspective, the words wild, feeling lucky, or call me on a pair of panties is not for the girl but the guy. And if a guy is reading/seeing those or it is discussed that the girl has them on….in my opinion it is the beginning of an invitation for something more!!!! I have seen the ads for these undergarments and the girls on here look very young! My first comment as the ad was playing was “are you kidding me?” We are headed in the wrong directions for our young female population, our daughters, our future!!!!

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    • Amanda, the models wearing this line in your catalogs certainly do not appear to be in their late teens or early twenties. I’d guess that they are about 14 or 15 years old. Recently, I was thumbing through one of these catalogs & could only wonder what kind of parent allowed their daughter to model these sexy underwear & pajamas at such a young age. I do not believe that anything VS does empowers women or girls of any age. When my husband & I are watching television & a VS commercial comes on, I feel threatened & insulted. I don’t feel that way for long – I rapidly recover as soon as the commercial ends, but I’m a 42 year old woman. How do you think a less than beautiful teenager feels? Or a woman who is 8 months pregnant? Or a mother of 3 who is constantly battling her weight & feels terribly unattractive to her husband? I wear VS bras & panties. I like the products. However, I do not believe the commercials should be aired showing such revealing content in such a suggestive manner or that CHILDREN should be used as models in the VS catalogs. Don’t you wonder how many child predators are masturbating while looking through the teen section? Tell yourself you’re doing females a service if it makes you feel better, but you & I both know that’s simply a justification!

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      • Don’t tell me what I know lady, all the people you described the women with 3 kids battling weight or the woman whose 8 months pregnant? They are all in my store all the time and find something that makes them feel comfortable in their skin, and EVERY company that sells clothing or anything has thin models and none of the pink models are 14 or 15 they are all of age

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    • “Feeling lucky” is about getting laid. Period. It degrades women and, as the smart, brave father pointed out, objectifies them, along with padded bras, airbrushed models, Photoshopped ads and the rest of the garbage Victoria’s Secret prides themselves on.

      “Call me”??? On your panties? Uh… booty call me is more like it.

      Vicky’s Secret started out a great company. They made cotton and cotton blend items that were comfy, stylish and kicky. Now they make hooker clothing out of synthetic junk put together in China by slave labor.

      If you really want to empower women, work for a non-profit in Africa or the National Organization for Women or some company that doesn’t shove shopping and low self-esteem down women’s throats 24/7.

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    • Amanda,
      I have over 20 years of branding and marketing experience, and 42 years as a woman on this planet. No matter what your rational, or words written, a picture speaks a thousand words. When the VS store has floor to ceiling imagery of enhanced women in sexual poses and riske items blasted publicly in the mall so sexual that my mother has to walk her grand daughter now 8 on the other side of the hallway it is shameful. For you to suggest these images are impowering is absolutely fallacious reasoning at it’s best. Try having a daughter of your own and come back to write us all some more nonsense.

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      • Amen Dayna! No doubt Amanda is clearly making sure she gets her “bread buttered” by falsely and inaccurately claiming whatever sounds PC to the public. Try investing your every waking and sleeping energies into someone other than yourself, such as your own children one day or think of the worlds young girls Amanda. Do you REALLY want to be a part of the cause, rather than a part of the solution of the advertisement attacks on all of these little girls & young ladies who are victim to public sexual inappropriateness in stores, magazines, billboards, commercials, etc.? I mean truly, there comes a time to put your big girl panties on and start assuming responsibility!!! Denial will surely bite you in the end. I hope you rethink your entire position on this Amanda and choose to make a wiser decision for yourself and to speak out for the girls of this world. God bless you.

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    • If you are really naive enough to think the words “feeling lucky?” aren’t an innuendo then you have a lot to learn. You’re company’s entire job is to sell sexual clothing that’s geared towards young women to feel sexy. That’s it. There’s no women empowerment. That philosophical bull-crap spit up by the marketing and HR team is a hoax. Honestly, I have nothing against VS. I think it is a great company. If a parent has a problem with something, then don’t let your kids buy it. Be a parent. If your child is more influenced by an advert than your own words then I think you have more to be worried about than some clothing line. That being said grow up… your company is trying to make money from a new target market… it’s life.

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    • The “Pink” line is catered to the late teens/early 20’s aka the college demographic (even though its pretty obvious that this extends to younger as well.) As witnessed by teenagers, they are awash in a sea of “PINK” in high schools every day. The off-shoot, Bright Young Things is clearly advertising to a younger demographic..If you are using Justin Bieber in your shows, CLEARLY, the demographic isn’t mostly college students.

      I don’t think there is anything wrong with VS, I like their stuff a lot but I am an adult, not spending my parent’s money to put flirtations, sexualized messages on my clothing. You clearly do not understand innuendo. Most well adjusted people would agree that is inappropriate to have the slogan “Wild” on a 15 year olds backside. When most men read that word on a woman’s butt, he isn’t usually thinking about the animal print that is surrounding the word. Come on, be real.

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    • You are correct, it’s supposed to be fun. However, your argument about whether the undergarments are geared toward middle school girls or high school girls is irrelevant. Either way they are impressionable teens. The fact that anything is embroidered on the panty is the point. Who do they want to see the messages on the underwear that say “call me,” or even “feeling lucky”? Regardless of if it is for St. Patrick’s day or a sexual innuendo the point is that most likely someone will see it other than the person wearing it. I absolutely love Victoria’s Secret and get all my underwear and bras there. But even as a college student the words are tacky. They only promote that someone else is supposed to see it, particularly a male. That’s all fine for adults but for middle and high school students it’s not appropriate.

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    • Hi Amanda so here is my problem i have an 11 year old daughter who because of ads ran buy your company with your barbie shaped models that in order for her to be beautiful and to feel she has worth she needs to have these skimpy under clothing and of course she has to tell her friends about how her almost 20 year old cousin got a gift cert. and bought my daughter underthings from your company , so she is cool I have heard the girls talk and some girls who don’t have as strict parent or parents as mine does have made mention of how the boys will really like it! We have babies in middle school ending up parents it is not just your company it is the socitey we live in today as a whole the music videos and other forms of media are what make these young people think its ok to show the world what you have and nothing bad will hapen and because of it girls are raped and murdered every day and the guy thinks it ok becuse she dressed the part of a floosy, No I do not blame your company alone but you are not helping teach these young ladies self respect by putting these clothes out there , your telling them their bodies not the person as a whole is what is important and no your product went from my daughters hand in to the trash can when she is 18 and has say then she can wear what she wants in the meantime momma rules this roost Self Repect , Honor and Courage to not be just 1 of the gang is what my daughters are learning they will not just be eye candy for some jerk who will not hold tight to vows spoken because he has no honor or respect for my girls .

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    • AMANdA, YOU SUCK! YOU ARE NAIVE AND DUMB IF YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE THAT COMPANY EXISTS TO EMPOWER WOMEN. YOU HAVE AN UGLY HEART, AN UGLY SOUL AND SKEWED MORALS. FEELING LUCKY ON A PAIR OF UNDERGARMENTS CAN ONLY HAVE ONE IMPLICATION…. AND YOU’RE DUMB IF YOU BELIEVE OTHERWISE. ENCOURAGING YOUNG GIRLS TO OBJECTIFY THEMSELVES IS SHAMEFUL.

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      • There’s no need for nasty personal attacks. I totally disagree with everything VS stands for, but it’s unacceptable to post comments like this. You’re calling for decency in products and marketing, so why not start with decency is communicating your point?

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    • Thank you for representing your company and sharing your ideas. I think that sex and underpants don’t have anything to do with the power of a woman. But culturally we are a bit confused about that. Sex and underpants are about the private lives of a woman. I think the argument here is how private should our private lives be? This is a question that deals with the force of desire and the need to satisfy it. But it has always been a substantial question. My grandmother was once asked why she made her bed everyday. She answered, “No one needs to see sheets but me.” And I don’t think anyone needs to see if my bottom is pink or “wild”. It’s my bottom.

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    • Well we all know the doulble meaning implied here…it’s a marketing sceme to draw in the younger girls for profit. At an age when they are most impressionable. Teens are bombarded with the message,,..to be successful you must be sexy….what a bunch of rubbish….fun is Tinkerbell or Pebbles……but then that wouldn’t be what VS is all about…selling sexy….I do believe womem should buy and wea what they want and for adults sexy is okay. Mothers and fathers have the responsibily to steer their young girls away from this kind of marketing and focus what is important…getting ready for adulthood and what comes along with being an adult, the right to makes an adult, informed, choice.

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    • I’m going to go against the grain and say this: Go you, Amanda.

      Go you for representing your company for what it truly is and maintaining your professionalism throughout this sea of ignorance. It’s not the company’s fault that some people simply don’t understand who exactly is supposed to be parenting their children.

      I commend you for making the effort to set the record straight and remind people what you guys sell and how you sell it. Personally, I’ve been shopping at VS since I was in middle school. Why? Because my mother shopped there. For us, strange as it sounds, we bonded when she took me to VS for the first time. Did I purchase a lace thong that said “Wild”? No. People forget that VS sells less suggestive, more, for lack of a better word, cordial panties.

      Keep doing what you do. Remember that, at least here anyway, logic is on your side.

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  2. I am the father of 4 daughters and 1 son who are all well into adulthood. Victoria Secret starts a new line to increase profits. Unfortunately many parents will buy this underwear for children because they do not want to deny there kids the latest trend. VS knows this as do other retailers. They know that parents can be led to buy anything for there kids as long as it is perceived as cool.
    The writer of the letter is a thoughtful person. I wish other parents were as thoughtful.

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  3. This is about as close to promoting kiddie pornography as society can get without actually doing it! I believe it is wrong in every way and should never be permitted! If this hits the market I will refuse to ever buy anything from Victoria’s secret for my wife again and I will discourage her and anyone else I know from doing so to the best of my abilities! A big name like Victoria’s Secret should have some moral grounds as I am sure they don’t need this new line to survive financially!! I believe they will really hurt their successful name and business will falter over this disgusting new idea!

    Sincerely,

    Father of young daughter!

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  4. I have a few things to say about this so this comment may be a bit long but I hope people will take the time to read it. I am a 20 year old female, soon to be 21. I appreciate this father’s concern for his daughter but I think I need to give some perspective as someone on the other side; a young daughter, not a parent. When I was younger, probably elementary through early middle school, I wore a lot of packaged underwear; they were cheap, cute enough, and did their basic job. As I started to get older, I started to want nicer undergarments. My body was changing and I wanted something to support that. I started buying underwear from Victoria’s Secret probably in mid-high school. Not because I wanted to feel sexy, or because I was seeking male attention but because their products are good quality and pretty. And they cost more so it was a treat to me to get something like that. It’s weird to me that parents talk about sexiness as sort of the opposite of empowered because at the age I am now, I think it’s important young women embrace their beauty and feel empowered by their bodies. Women are beautiful in all shapes and sizes. I am absolutely not the thin model-esque body type people complain that these brands cater to. And believe it or not, over the last 5 years nothing has fit me better or lasted longer than Victoria’s Secret bras and underwear. And maybe it’s silly but I just feel better when I have pretty undergarments on. I don’t dress for other people, I dress for me. Looking good makes me feel good, even if it’s things nobody is going to see. I actually think it’s great that VS has the PINK line that caters toward young women because a lot of 15-25 year olds are trying to find that middle ground. And honestly, it’s not like they’re trying to sell your daughters crotch-less panties. For the record, I love VS and I have since high-school. I also didn’t have sex in high-school, I didn’t have boyfriends, I was a great student and I had a job all through high school. I know things have changed even in the last 5 or so years, but you can’t point fingers at everyone else. Teach your daughters to love themselves. Teach them that they deserve respect from boys. But also teach them to embrace that they are a woman, not to be ashamed of it. Trying to shield them from things like VS underwear will not have the desired effect. Let them grow and blossom into women but help them see that childhood is a time to be treasured and time you can’t get back.

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    • Sarah you do make a valid point however this is not the way VS market their wear. They market their wear as much for the men to see as women parade around acting sexy and giving just the opposite of what you are saying. I have two daughters who are now grown and married and not once did they feel the need to go out and buy VS underwear to feel comfortable. I feel the writer makes a valid point that every father should this way about their little girls growing up way to fast in a big girl world.

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      • You are correct in that that is how they market their adult line. The adult line is sexy and beautiful. The PINK line is perfect because younger women can wear it and feel pretty and fun and ‘grown-up’ while still not going as far as wearing the racier bits. And kids are growing up faster and faster, I will definitely agree not always in a good way. This can be a way for them to feel like their growing up without buying a black lace g-string. And honestly, underwear are the least of our problems. Society teaches people of all ages all sorts of things but it’s the parents job to help children distinguish what we’re sold from reality. I loved Barbies when I was a kid and I love my body now because I know I am not a toy and I’m not supposed to look like one. I play video games but I’m not the least bit violent. In fact, Playing Tomb Raider as a young teen got me really into ancient Egypt and foreign places. I even took Cultural Anthropology and World Cultures classes in college because of it. The market and society is what it is and I applaud people for standing up for their beliefs. But write your letters, get it off your chest and then talk to your kids. That’s all you can do sometimes. Sorry not all of that was completely related to what you said but I wanted to get it out!

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    • While I don’t agree with VS and this new line, I totally agree that parents need to teach their daughters to love themselves and that they deserve respect frrom men. My dad did teach me these things. My dad told me that I was beautiful, so I didn’t need to wait to hear it from some guy. He spent time with me, and I didn’t need to fill a void with guys. Love on yor daughters, dads, what a treasure they are.

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      • Sarah I agree with you 100% & feel that you stated it very well on both of your comments. It’s more about parenting than it is marketing. Teach your children respect for themselves & it won’t matter & yes I have kids, 2 of them. They know right from wrong & just bc they play a video game with violence doesn’t mean they will grow up to be violent anymore than wearing panties with words on them is going to make a young lady go out, & for lack of a better term, “slut around”. Like you stated sometimes nice panties just make you feel good about yourself whether anyone sees them or not. It’s all how you teach your children.

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    • Brava!!! Your post reflects the type of young lady VS needs to represent. The concerned parents fear these garments would undermine anything that would make their little girls whole,authentic women.

      So,give us a girl who wonders if her step-ins will hold up in the wash,if the elastic will loosen or snap. She wonders if her bra will support,be binding or have synthetic blends that crumble or turn into glue. If it feels good,functions well,looks nice and leaves her money for other necessities,she’s satisfied.

      Her underwear is just one choice she makes to be practical and reward herself for being who she is.

      Some companies don’t think wisdom is sexy or self-respect cool. We know better.

      Let’s hope Victoria’s Secret leaves no doubt that they agree with us.

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  5. I have to say thank you to this father for saying what the rest of us have been trying to impress upon our daughters… I have two teenage daughters and trust me its hard to feel good about letting them buy anything from your store because of the lack of “coverage” and the less than impressive verbiage on your panties…So please quit trying to objectify our young daughters, women of all ages should be judged on their merit not their panties and quit making bras that make them 2 cup sizes bigger cause the boys/men are less than pleased by the false advertising….

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  6. 1. Talk to your daughters about sex. Don’t shelter it from them. Don’t make them get bad information from their peers. Girls at that age DO get sexual feelings. It’s biological and normal. Instead of having them feel ashamed, give them an honest conversation. Stop being lazy parents and expect society to raise your kids. This is the age of the internet so your teenagers have access to everything out there. Do not lie to them. Be honest. Give them guidelines. Show them respect.
    2. As consumers, feel free to write your disapproval to VS. However, the best way to hit them is in the pocketbook. You’re right. They care about money. So when the lines doesn’t sell well it will be discontinued. HOWEVER, do not be upset if it does do well. You should understand not everybody shares your beliefs. They obviously created this line because their PINK line is attractive to the younger crowds.
    3. It’s just underwear. That’s all it is. It is not responsible for the actions of young girls. Young girls are responsible for their own actions. Teach your daughters to respect themselves. Shaming their body only makes them ashamed on their body. Teaching them about safe sex does not mean they will turn into little whores. It means they will understand why safe sex is important and hopefully, when they’re ready to be sexually active (at whatever age that may be) they won’t be a disease ridden baby maker. Material bears no responsibility for actions. That’s like me blaming Hershey’s for making me fat.

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    • Thank you! It’s sad I had to scroll down so far to read some “common sense.” As the VS employee stated, this is geared towards 19-20 year-old. I hope we can all agree that the apparel is appropriate for that age group. Parents of younger children are responsible for deciding what is/isn’t appropriate to wear for them.

      But most importantly, I would hope that parents would raise their daughters well enough to trust them in situations like this, where body image, sexuality, and perceived beauty are at play. It’s not that hard to comprehend.

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    • I talk very openly with my 11 year have for the last few years about sex and her body but I also believe if given the choice of wearing clothes my friends will think me cool for and having the courage to say it not right for us to wear these what do you think an 11 year old would choose My daughter is very smart but she is just a child and per pressure has always been around it would help parents everywhere if companies would think but as I said to a rep of VS I do not hold just your company at fault for the demoralization it is our entire socity at fault but you know I can sure tell you growing up you didn’t see nor did you hear the garbage we do today drug, sex, crime, all of it was not a part of our culture back then and before you ask i am 51 and mother of 2 and 11 year old and a 5 year old so yes I am old enough to know how to speak and raise my children with morals and total self respect i a a caree woman in a mans field 24 year driving and life in construction so self respect and dignity a really big on my list of the thing I teach my girls but let me teach you something a very wise person said ( FOR EVERY ACTION THERE IS A REACTION )
      by promoting the products that girls to young to have a firm grasp on how their choices can effect their futures is in my eye wrong

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  7. Pingback: A Letter to Victoria’s Secret From a Father | Live Real, Live Hope

  8. i find this line repulsive, my daughter is very young still but my gosh if this is what its coming down to now, what is it going to be like when my daughter is older. makes me sick what kind of world we are leaving for the children, i 100% agree with this letter.

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      • I could care less if my kids “fit in”, and so could they. My girls know the importance of getting a good education and giving something back to the world, and they know being a teenager who wears trashy clothes (undergarments or clothes of any kind!) is not the way to get attention. This is what is wrong with the world we live in, our kids being bombarded with the wrong messages and being made to feel like they need to follow the flock, like sheep.

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      • Normal Teen, I love that you’re getting in on this! We need to hear from everyone. But it’s not so much the underwear that people are concerned about. A lot of it is cute and fun! It’s the messages that the company is putting out there that has everyone upset. The stuff you deal with IS huge and some of what we’re talking about here is why it’s hard. We’re all influenced by this stuff, even if we don’t realize it. VS sends the message that you only have value if you’re beautiful, thin and look sexy in their underwear. So then you have girls/women feeling like they should look better or different than they do and guys/men expecting us to look unrealistic–think very little food, probably some surgery and Photoshop. If VS’s message was that we’re all beautiful and deserve to feel great in pretty underwear, that would be totally different. Strong, powerful, intelligent, successful women can enjoy great underwear, but that’s not the woman VS wants us to be. They want us to believe that what counts is being hot. There’s nothing wrong with being sexy–and of course that doesn’t make you a skank or a whore (from your comment below.) What’s wrong is saying that you shouldn’t be anything except sexy. And I can tell you’ve got a whole lot more going for you than just cute undies.

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      • Oops. Just read a bunch more of your comments. I know you’re feeling attacked and you’re trying to defend yourself, but wow…That’s some nasty stuff you’re spewing. Just remember that the people talking are parents who love their kids and want all of you to have the best chance in life. Don’t hate us for caring that some stupid company wants to get rich off of you no matter what.

        PS You sound like you’ve had it hard and are giving it back even harder.The hate and anger are just going to eat you alive. Totally not worth it. I really hope you have people in your life who make you feel loved and important.

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    • I wish it were ridiculous. But it’s not. In some ways, selling Cokes to children is very different than enticing pre-teens to wear suggestive underwear. In some ways, it’s very much the same. I applaud this father’s voice. The biggest problem in our society is that WE DON’T SPEAK UP. SPEAK UP, SPEAK UP, SPEAK UP. And WAKE UP, WAKE UP, WAKE UP.

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      • Dear “A Normal Teen,”

        As a 21 year old college student who wears VS merchandise, I completely disagree with everything you have said.
        I personally went through Hell and back in middle school and high school, having cute underwear will not, in itself, cause teens to be rejected by their peers. If the other teens are going to target you, they’re going to target you, no matter what you do to try to fit in. For that matter, no one should have to TRY or CHANGE to fit in in the first place. The fact that you think that having cute or sexy underwear is important just shows how twisted our society is, down to its core. Lack of expensive underwear will not make you a “socially awkward loser.” The things that make a girl come home and cry have nothing to do with that, and everything to do with the pain that comes from others being cruel. It is not a problem with parents not allowing young women under their care, under their roof, to wear VS underwear. The problem is with students that target others and torture them.
        I spent plenty a night at home crying, but it was never over the fact that my mother would not let me wear VS. It was because I felt tortured, but I was not willing to change who I am to please them. In fact, I am a better, stronger, kinder woman for it. It is not the underwear I choose to wear that empowers me. It is my journey, my story, that empowers me.

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    • I too, am a teen. I doubt i’m normal cause that’s a bloody social construct, but I’m a teen nonetheless. I’m eighteen. Okay yes, the freedom to wear whatever you like comes as you get older, in the same way your parents cannot enforce upon you dietary guidelines. But I don’t like the labels they put on this line, I feel like an object “wild things”? What the hell? Am I an animal someone wants to tame? I like even less that these will be sold to teenagers younger than myself. Those are some hard formative years to be worrying if your underwear is sexy enough. And it’s not only the line it’s the advertisements that will come with it. They will sway younger girls into thinking they have to look a certain way, and that sucks. I don’t want girls in high school and college to feel like shit because they don’t fit into a sexual archetype Victoria’s Secret likes to promote. If you like this kind of underwear buy it! that’s great I’m sure they have them in your size. Heck I have some VS panties too! My problem is the way this is going to be commercialized. This kind of line directed at younger girls, affects the millions of impressionable little sisters and cousins in the world who develop their views on society based on their elders. Do we want them to think that women are only objects “wild things”, asking men if they are “feeling lucky”?

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      • Laughing at A Normal Teen…the order in which you have your life values, grow up, have sex, get pregnant, THEN get married and die…..no wonder you are at odds with most of the posts — you have skewed values, which undermines your thoughts about this line of VS Products. You are the PERFECT example of why people are upset with this retailers marketing to a target audience that is impressionable about what their choices need to be.

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      • A Normal Teen
        March 24, 2013 @ 11:12 PM
        I think you all need to get laid and take a Zantax. Or embrace the fact the girls are girls and they will all grow up, have sex, get pregnant, get married and die.

        As the mother of a 13 and 10 yr old, I can tell you this. They WILL NOT wear this line at all. period. end of discussion… secondly “a norma teen” your above comment is exactly what we are all talking about. We don’t want our children to “grow up, have sex, get pregnant, get married and die” we want our children to understand and value the complexity and commitment that comes with sex. We wish for them to growp up, meet someone very special, get married. THEN have sex, have babies, live a long love filled life and finally pass when life has truely been LIVED. The fact that VS and everyone else for that matter wants to teach my kids that sex is something to be given freely instead of valued sickens me. Too bad things aren’t like they were 25 years ago when the word sex wasn’t mutter around children; when innocence was still cherished and preserved.

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      • Normal teen, when you get a little older and experience more of the world you’ll realize that not all women grow up. Not all women get pregnant or married.
        But, yes, we do all die. Your retorts are curt and lame and show your lack of wisdom and integrity.

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    • There is always a line of what is not appropriate for various ages. Marketing provocative undergarments to adolescents is more akin to pushing coco-cola for infants. And given that these are adolescents that we are talking about, I find it the duty of everyone older to set a good example, INCLUDING teens. If you find it empowering to show your confidence through what you have printed on your behind, that is fine. However, I agree with the author. No little girl should find her self worth in that. And that is exactly what ends up happening with such as fragile age, and the public just accepts it. It needs to change.
      So back to the point; I find your cutting argument against giving self worth back to our pre-teens a bit more ridiculous. Rethink your values, Normal teen, before you start interacting with anyone younger than yourself, please.

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    • That argument sounds even more ridiculous. That is such a logically fallacious example, and if you really are a teenager, don’t claim to be normal because you’re misrepresenting millions of teenagers who have the common sense not to be suckered by the lies about sexuality that companies like VS put up on posters and advertisements.

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    • lol what an idiot. if you looked at it objectively, the dad makes a good point. I’m twenty, and i’m already thinking about my future daughter that I may have. trust me when I say this. I’ve been homeschooled since 1st grade, my parents were those same concerned ones you would liken then to be. guess what? Here I am in college, no worse for wear, wonderful social life, never once cried myself to sleep. a lot of my friends are almost the exact same way, none of them have experienced this either. do your research my friend. i’ll only speak for me when i say I’m a guy and from my perspective it doesn’t help me to empower women looking at those posters or reading that these things exist. I agree with a lot of people here who say that pretty much you can empower women a lot more using different ways. and considering the line is geared towards middle schoolers…who should, really, not even worry about this sorta thing until the reach the end at least. if anyone should be a “normal teen” its me and those like me. you are just a product of culture. we are the breakaways, the abnormal, those who have little voice because of loud people not listening with open minds like yourself.

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    • No problem. When da big ole Co’colas get ignored for the smaller,tastier ole timey bottles of Coke,they’ll notice. When their juices and waters and other healthier products have greater sales,they’ll be pleased to have consumers purchase items with less sugar and caffeine. If they sell H2o, they will turn Coca-Cola into water for an increase in profits and popularity.

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    • Why do you think that schools are no longer allowing sodas in the machines at school!
      Please help us relate to why you think our arguments are ridiculous. You could not possibly know what a parents mind set is. You will someday be a parent, if fate allows, and then you will be able to make your choices/comments for them. You are in fact only a “normal Teen” in todays society, which is in itself askew!

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    • Normal Teen oh my word where to begin. Your child should be able to fit in without wearing certain things but Bullying has became such a problem now a days that it is sad to say that some parents out there dont have enough control on their kids to get it stopped. If my child is EVRE caught making fun of a kid of what they wear, live or anything they will be grounded and appologies to the child. Its a shame that you feel like what someone wears tells who they are. How you come across is to be one of the kids that do make others feel like they are not deserving to be your friend or hang with you because they dont wear certain things. You know some of the best friends are the ones that are given a chance by some when others wont. They cerish a friendship more than the ones that take it for granted. I was not one that wore name brand much. Ever so often I got something that had a label on it but that label did not make who I am. My parents raising me in a family that taught me self worth and that no one is better than you thats what made me into the woman I am. I have taught that to foster children that has came through my home that has been bullied because of their life style that they had no control over. I have seen children come in my home beat down by parents telling them they were never going to be anything and hitting them and then go to a school to learn to be beat down by kids in their class. I tried to make sure those kids wore name brand things because unlike me living in a family that taught me at home that I had worth my children from foster care didnt have that blessing so there for I felt it was a need to make sure they didnt have to go to school to deal with the same type of abuse they were just moved out of. Those kids at school that these teens bully you dont know their stories. You dont know if that child is living in a single parent home where the parent is doing the best they can, or if a child is in a home being abused, or in a home were thefamily is struggling. I have a huge problems with labels teenagers put on others. Teens need to stop looking at the outside as a socially awkward oser how you put it and look at what they have to offer. The reason most teens are labeled as you put it socially awkward losers is because teens never give them a chance and their fore they would rather stay to them self than to have to be beat down more by others. The man reason I have thought about home schooling my child is because of the exact thing you have shown. I dont want my child to ever feel like he is better than nor do I want him to feel like he is less than by what I call losers. Sorry you calling another teen a loser by the label they wear pushed the wrong butto with me. Why becaue I was raised right and have seen to many foster kids come in my home that were on the what some call losr list but in my books they were awesome and unique and it made them special and I made sure they all knew that to. Try to stop looking at labels and being a follower andstart being a leader. Take a chance!!! Yes you might lose friends but you also might find a true friend and not a fake one. If they are true friends they will stay with you. If they are fake they will leave and your better without them.

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  9. It is sad that the bottom line is what makes Victoria Secret (VS) emphasizes the bottoms of young women.

    It seems VS is getting bolder and going beyond discretion in the way they promote their product for young girls and the kinds of product they sell.

    Using such suggestive sayings desensitizes young girls in they way they offer themselves. I don’t even think this is appropriate even in what is becoming an amoral society. Who wants their teen girls thinking it is no big thing to offer themselves to guys and that is what is being said by their VS.

    Am I just a prude or are they uncaring about the young girls of our society? I think their campaign is very disturbing to say the least.

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  10. My 10 year old is already concerned about what her under garments look like. So with that new line of panties it’s just a matter of time before I hear her beg for them. It starts at a young age no matter what kind of crowd your intending it to be gear towards, the younger ones will also want them. Remember when we all wanted o grow up too fast….and wear things that we shouldn’t have at our age. It’s no different, looks like this store will not be on my shopping list anymore.

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  11. I@ Anon, yea let 12 old daughter wear that crap and we will see what boys she brings home. Good luck! I’m 26, a male raised by good parents, and really just the past 5 years living a life following Christ to my best, not perfect by any means. Don’t have a daughter yet but when I do. This dad is on the money. People (VS) are caught up in the wrong idea of what life is about. It is not about money, the richest man with money is not always the happiest. Life and all things should be living rich in the name of Christ. And telling young girls they need to wear that kind of stuff at that age, disgusting. I had to work hard at that age of a young boy to get a girl ti like me, now VS is giving girls the self worth of a dollar to make $20. Only God knows where your heart is, and yea it suck that this is an issue these days when there are much bigger problems in the world.

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  12. I bought VS underwear as a teen, mostly from peer pressure. Everyone else had cute underwear, so I wanted some too. But since becoming an adult I have taken offense at the sexual nature of their ads. Years ago I made the decision not to ever buy VS again because I believe their ads are a form of pornography. I have very well made bras from a boutique here that are much better than anything VS sells, without the sexualization. I now have 2 daughter who will officially enter their teens this year (twins) and I am doing my best to teach them that you can feel pretty in pretty underwear without having to buy from stores like VS.

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  13. And the line has already launched so if you think letters will stop it your wrong, and to the guy who is offended by our windows in the mall, you shouldn’t walk by any lingerie store ever because we like every other company market our products

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  14. Amanda, You can delude yourself into believing that the underwear,”feeling lucky” are for St.Patrick’s day and the fact that the ‘Wild” is in animal print, all you want. BUT please don’t try to tell the rest of us that they are “FUN”. Either you do not have a little girl and/or your are so caught up in your job that you don’t see they are INTENDED to be provocative while allowing justification of the line as you stated. Panties of this nature are MEANT to make a girl/woman feel sexy. I think if you want to make your provocative undies that is fine but please don’t market to teenagers/ children. If you don’t agree….I’ll ask you to think about how you feel next time you put on your underwear and you look at yourself in the mirror or think about that special guy in your life. Do you think,”Dang I look good”, “I look hot!”, “He is gonna love these”? I think you will see the point. As a parent myself, I made sure my daughter NEVER wore any provocative undies. If her friends had them that was fine but she knew I would cut them up if they ever were brought into this house. I kept a close relationship with her so I didn’t ever have to worry about it because we talked a lot about what is appropriate and what is not.

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    • They are fun colors and some of them do have words on them but the store isn’t demented for having them, and you can all say that the press release says its for young teens but the only time a young teen buys this stuff is when a parent buys it for them, my experience in the store gives me a view that most don’t have and 12 and 13 year olds are not in there buying panties that say “call me” on their own, their mother is buying it for them… I do feel that the phrases are harmless because it doesn’t have to be taken in a inappropriate way but I am obviously alone in that feeling

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  15. I think you should raise your daughter properly and you won’t have to worry about what Victorias Secret is doing. If parents are being pressured by their children to buy lingerie for them then there is something wrong with those parents. They need to be an adult and a parent and not give in to every wish their child has. As a young woman I enjoy buying underwear from Victorias Secret. It’s a reward for myself and makes me feel good about myself, plus they make high quality and comfortable products. If they want to market towards 18-25 year olds with fun themes and trendy styles I think they should be able to. It is a parents responsibility to protect their children and help guide the to do the right thing. Victoria’s Secret empowers women in my opinion. You can not deny that woman can be sexy and powerful. If you go to any department store you will see bras and panties in fun patterns and colors and trendy styles aimed at a younger generation of women, I don’t see how VS is any different. Just because a teenage girl wants to wear a fun bra or cheeky panties doesn’t mean she feels her self worth is based on her body and her sexuality, she may just think they are fun. Again it is a parents job to guide their children into adulthood and help them make good choices and instill good morals. As difficult as teenage girls can be it is up to the parents to do the hard work and communicate and discipline their children so they learn right from wrong. Whatever under garments the kids are wearing does not make a difference on how these girls will turn out if a parent does their job. There is no one right way to parent, but there are key elements that are important in helping your child find a healthy and happy place in this crazy world. Stop blaming underwear companies and the Internet and other people and take a good look at yourself and your parenting style and try to find ways to improve so you are equipped to help your children turn out to be good people.

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    • It can be hard trying to fight between doing what your parents think is right and doing what society thinks is right. Being a teen girl myself, I know whats right, but it can still be hard to choose whats right because society seems to put the idea in our heads that sparkly thongs and “Wild” underwear are what IS right. Sometimes its hard trying to figure out how to live with proper morals AND be a part of a generation that seems to go the opposite direction. Though my parents are my main reason for my morals, I always seem to feel my generation’s immoral fads yanking on my sleeve. I wouldn’t blame VS for 6th graders wearing bedazzled underwear, but they certainly aren’t making things easier. I guess people are expecting stores to encourage good esteem and good morals since girls already struggle with finding their natural beauty. I certainly wish they did. I guess all I’m saying is that parents can raise us right but we can’t always stop society from affecting us. I don’t shop at VS but that doesn’t me I’m tempted to because I know its the “in” thing.

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  16. I have a daughter getting ready to turn 15 & I am trying to teach her she doesn’t need to worry about what she’s wearing to get others approval. I definitely don’t want her thinking she needs to wear this underwear so her friends approve & the friends then letting boys know my daughter or other girls are wearing this underwear. Then the boys start thinking things that aren’t true about the girls & ruining reputations of girls who’ve never even done anything. This underwear could lead to all sorts of bad things. Please reconsider the line.

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  17. As a mother of grown daughters and a woman, I have to say that I have never felt “enpowered” because of VS. I think the practically nude “fashion” show that VS has is embrassing and it puts out the message that women are sex objects and nothing more. It also puts out a false image as to what a real woman looks like. No wonder men leave their wives or have an affair after years of marriage. After a couple of kids no woman looks like a VS model anymore and I believe it makes men want to wander in search of this “perfect woman”!. Go ahead VS and pretend that you are enpowering women, you are just after the almightly dollar like every other retailer out there.

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  18. I remember when I was younger Victoria’s Secret was a lingerie store that catered to making a woman feel sexy yet classy, beautiful, and a little spoiled. It was a splurge on myself when I got a bonus check at work. I don’t know when or why they decided to change their target customer and aim for the younger college girl but in my opinion it was a mistake and a big letdown for me as a maturing woman. I am only 40 and yet I can tell you it has been many years since I have shopped there and bought anything except for bodyspray. I wish they’d go back to what they used to be, especially now that I have the money to spend.

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  19. Okay, I’m old, like really old. I grew up on a farm and when the time came for a new dress or skirt, I went with my dad to the feed store to pick out the printed feed sacks my mom would use to make them with. As for panties and bras, we would get out the Sears or Montgomery catalog and would order my comfortable white cotton panties that covered your entire bottom. I didn’t worry about boys calling me ~ they did and I was not a “wild thing” by any means. My two daughters were given permission to have a few pairs of bikinis as they became juniors an seniors. I was taught right from wrong and trust me, I did not want to contend with my parents if I did something wrong. It’s such a shame that little girls are not allowed to be “Little” anymore and most of the time it’s the moms that pushing them to grow up way too fast.I thank God and my parents for the Christian upbringing that I had and I pray every night that my three college age granddaughters and four grandsons will continue in the path that there parents have taught them. It’s so wrong that all these little girls’ priorities are what name brand clothes and little sexy panties they are going to wear each time they leave the house.

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    • Amen, Great G-ma. From a good looking 21 year old who has no need to buy ridiculous pieces of clothing saying “call me” and “wild thing.” In fact, both my boyfriend and I cringe at the ridiculous, cheesy, slutty things they print on their underwear these days. Neither of us are boring, party-pooping people, either. We enjoy a good time and we have wonderful lives. Oh, and for the record to the other readers, my underwear is in fact attractive and tasteful. You don’t need slut-slogans to be cute, and it is definitely not empowering.

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      • Emily, I was raised in the fifties and trust me, we had lots of good times in our full skirted crinoline slips and our penny loafers and rock and rolling with Elvis, good clean fun. I married the best lookin’ guy around 2 weeks after I graduated from high school and I wore white silk panties under my wedding dress. We’ve been married 56 years…it’s been a fun journey and we waited until AFTER the wedding to have more fun. Thank you Emily.

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  20. I am a 14 year old girl. And I think it depends on how you take things and how you decide to look at things. I love Victoria secret. The women on the posters do not make me feel lower about myself. My mother taught me to love myself; whether there is posters there or not, you’re going to be self conscience. I love their underwear line, and that there making things for us younger girls(: Every time I get something from there its like a little treat for myself. Since i have to see it. But seeing all you adults on here arguing is kind of sad. If you don’t want your daughter to shop there don’t let her. If you do then leave it be. And stop trying to put down VS.

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  21. i have never written about any issue before, nor do i have a small child anymore…but this issue made me. Please parents, this is so wrong – young children need to just be little girls or boys and play and enjoy their youth – it is gone in a flash !

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  22. i agree with him 100% that kind of thing should be only for adults and not kids in highschool or down and we wounder why kids are having there own kids and a young age maybe they should start paying for the kids that have there own kids of there own at a young age

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  23. Children do not earn money. They are dependent on their parents to buy their clothing. (That’s how it’s worked for the past 18 years in my house, anyway.) If the parents can’t/don’t step up and draw the line on this porn underwear, then there’s no hope. They clearly have no morals and place no value on their daughter’s self-esteem. VS doesn’t give a flip about your daughter’s morality. VS doesn’t care that women are viewed as objects. Just look at their website. Those models are there to sell sex, not underwear.

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  24. I applaud this father. I haven’t shopped in a vs story in over 8 years. While I was pregnant with my first daughter I wanted a nice great breast feeding bra. I thought they would have one. I was stunned when I walked in & asked where the breast feeding bras were. When I was told we don’t carry those, I said we’ll your missing out & I won’t be back!!! They still send me coupons for free underwear. No thanks, I throw the coupons in the trash. To the vs employee why don’t u tell your marketing team to start a maternity & new mom line instead of preying on young girls !! Ask them if they don’t think pregnant women & moms are suppose to be sexy?

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  25. Thank you thank you thank you sarah!!! You took the words straight from my 22 year old mouth.

    Also teach your children about purity, no ones gonna see the underwear unless they show them!

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  26. Why does everyone need to fight about this?
    Honestly, I liked the letter because the dad makes some great points and it shows he loves and cares about his daughter.
    Also, I am a late teenager and I wear Victoria’s Secrets panties and bras because they are comfortable and I like to wear cute underwear sometimes.
    I believe the underwear/slogans alone will not corrupt a child. Sure it’s not the greatest thing, but it’s also not the biggest thing. There has been underwear around for a long time that has said phrases like the ones these panties at VS are advertised to say.
    Talk to your kids, that is the most important thing. Teach your daughters to respect themselves and that the boys should respect them too. Also, if you do not want them wearing that underwear, don’t buy it for them. If they make the choice later in life to buy it, then they will. But if you do what you should and teach them to respect themselves, then they should be okay.
    Everyone has a different opinion. All opinions have reasoning behind them. Let’s all be nice to each other and respect the opinions?

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  27. I totally agree. Coming from me, a 14 year old girl’s point of view, I have seen posters in the Woodlands mall that I find inappropriate. I’m in the 8th grade and my friends will tell me about how they bought a new thong at PINK. GIRLS, we’re in 8th grade!! Our society here today lacks intelligence with today’s teenagers due to television, ads, music, peers, some parents, etc. This isn’t anything new right? Which I find sad. I’ve been told that at one of the local middle schools, they will be banning yoga pants because of how tight it is and the boys with there hormonal problems. Girls think buying these items to impress boys are really important.. They talk about it constantly. Here’s a story. I was sitting with a group of girls at lunch and this new girl started sitting with us. She started talking about the first time she had sex. She’s 13….13!!! Did you catch that? The conversation started getting really disturbing to where a few of the other girls were leading on asking questions and how they were going to loose they’re virginity by 16. I got to the point where I was feeling sick and ended up sitting somewhere else for the rest of the school year. Parents does this upset you? Heck, I’m a little girl and this upsets me because of the type of things I have to hear and see with the peers out in school! I actually do filming. I act, script write, cinematography and so on. After reading this message, it has inspired me to write up something and try getting it produced! Someone get ready, because I’ll be getting my typing on!

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  28. I have two daughters, the eldest turning 20 tomorrow, the youngest about to turn 16. When my youngest was 3, we went into a local department store looking for underwear for her. She fell head over heels in love with something that made me ill. A sparkling, shiny, lame pink and purple swirled bra and panty set in sizes 2, 4, 6 and 6x. A BRA and PANTIE set in shimmering metallic magic fabric, sized to fit my baby. I was horrified, disgusted, saddened and angry. Who would even imagine such a thing? I noticed, sadly, that the sizes were picked over and there were not many left on the rack. Needless to say my daughter didn’t get those shiny shimmery horrors. i cringe at the early sexualization of our daughters.

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  29. This is an excellent letter than takes an active stance towards changing the cresting tide of oversexualization and exploitation of children and young women.

    I was personally affected by these types of media campaigns during my teen and young adult years, and it has taken YEARS to overcome the assumptions inherent this type of advertising–that a young woman’s role in male-female relationships is to be available for and attractive enough to provide sex for any man who is interested enough to pursue it.

    In the meantime, because I grew up believing this this was “normal” and that “that’s what’s supposed to happen” I endured sexual abuse and assault at the hands of multiple men and have struggled from low self-esteem and insecurity from the age of 10.

    It has only been in the context of a sacrificial, loving, and respectful relationship with a man who showed me for the first time what it means to be valued and esteemed as a woman and a human being (rather than a sexual object) that I have really begun to understand what the role of a woman in a male-female relationship is: to love in a giving and sacrificial way to the betterment of each other. When this love is reciprocal between a man and a woman in a committed relationship, both people are the better for it. Sex is an important part of this kind of love, of course, but certainly not the primary means of showing it or the focus of the relationship.

    This relationship has been enormously healing in many ways, and I wish that as a teenager/young woman someone, ANYONE had told me that this was even a possibility, let alone something I should expect for myself.

    Both the message of the campaign and the very fact of providing lingerie for 12 year olds (in WHAT WORLD do 12 year olds need lingerie?)–show being available and attractive for sex to men as “cool” and “grown-up.” To put slogans on CHILDRENS underwear with messages that would only be used in a context of soliciting a stranger for sex is quite simply put, active support and grooming for child prostitution.

    Combined with a continuous media message that “all young women are having sex” (which actually doesn’t match the well-studied reality of what young women in America actual believe or are doing), young women will continue to believe the same message I did–and suffer similar damaging consequences.

    Fathers, is this really the future you want for your little girls?

    Young men, do you really want your future wife to believe that her role is simply to be a sex object for you? Is this a belief you will want the mother of your children to pass on to your children?

    To the original author: if you really want to see change, I encourage you to start a public campaign through an online petition organization such as change.org. Through similar campaigns major changes have occurred in similar areas–such as major teen girls magazines agreeing to stop photoshopping their photos and include “normal-sized” girls in their photo shoots. I believe you could really truly cause VS to change on this issue you if you pursue a public petition campaign on the issue.

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  30. Thank you for this article. When I saw the article I did indeed look up the VS website and reviewed their ‘Bright Young Things’ campaign. It fuels the engines of people like Michael Rafferty that their lust for these ‘Bright Young Things’ as legitimate and that it is ok to continue to desire people like young 8 year old Victoria Stafford who paid that terrible price for his ‘admiration.’ People please vote against this campaign and against VS’ latest PR brainchild with their wallets and show the stakeholders that we do not approve and do not buy any of this.

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  31. So, at the top of this message board, someone entreats us all to “keep our messages positive”. What?! I am completely appalled at this evil marketing scheme. Victoria Secrets, please fire the sick member of your team who came up with this demented idea. Teenaged girls everywhere, please listen to me. Do not frivolously demean your worth. Your sexuality is your power. Use it wisely. If you squander your sexual power as a young girl, you will have less power when you need it most as a grown woman. Please believe that you are uniquely talented, and use your power to improve the world. You will know when it’s time to use your sexual power by listening to your heart. Sending a gigantic hug to you wherever you are. Big Sis, Auntie, Mama, Teacher, and Professional who’s seen some of life.

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  32. Dear Reverend, I love your letter. You are an honorable father who is beautifully protective of his daughter, but you said one thing that says you’ve already surrendered on something.

    You said one day she will be a rebellious teenager. Never give up on Christ to protect your daughter from the ravages of those who wish to steal her innocence and her obedience. Many youth grow up in their faith to love and serve our Lord and reject the expectation of a “rebellious” teen that companies/profiteers like Victoria’s Secret count on.

    Treat her daily with the respect and God-given dignity and entrust her soul to our Lord and these minions of evil will be of no interest to her.

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  33. I understand your concern. And although I don’t agree with you totall I respect your views. At middle school age my child is still under my control so to speak. She will still be finacially dependant on me. I will not fund the purchase of under garments with such sayings on them. My children are not being raised by commercial, or media. I raise my children to love and respect themselves.And to respect that their bodys are the Lords vessels. Lent to them for their time here on earth. My husband and myself are their role models no-one else. If parent take an active role in raising their children we don’t have to fear the corporate world.

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  34. I don’t have a daughter but I have 2 beautiful nieces ages 6 and 10(soon to be 11)….and my 10 yr old niece is at that age where she wants to be just that a 10 yr old and I feel she doesn’t need underwear like that making her think she has to have tho just to be pretty or even accepted, teenage girls don’t need underwear like that, how about making pretty underwear that is simple like bright colors stripes hearts or polka dots and that doesn’t have call me on them or any other phrases that give the wrong impression….

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  35. If you are defining sexy and smart as mutually exclusive, you are contributing to the dangerous dichotomy placed on the shoulders of women more than some stupid panties. A sexy women can be smart and anything else she wants to be. Taking your clothes off on tv doesn’t make you dumb either. If you knew how much they got paid to do it, you would think they were pretty smart. These are marketed toward women in their 20s. And yes they could be seen by women/girls younger than that. They sell condoms in drug stores,,,are you against that too? All of you who don’t want your teen daughter corrupted or exploited by panties had better take a serious look at your parenting skills. Maybe you could try having a discussion with them instead of trying to shelter them from everything. If one pair of sexy panties ruins your life or self esteem you probably had bigger problems to start with. There is no shame in being sexy and confident. If wearing VS makes you feel that way, then go for it.

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  36. As a father of a 12 year old daughter. I would hope that the world would not give my child any more reason to embrace the decay of the dignity once instilled by our parents, unfortunately our world embraces the marketing aimed at liberating the minds of our beautiful children. When do we say enough is enough. In a world where self worth is meaningless, shouldn’t we be afraid of consequence. What are we doing to the future in which our children and their children will inherit. We are responsible for that outcome. Is money all that drives you, after all we are just passing through and for most of us, we have lived the best part of our lives already, can we say it’s time to think about our kids. Shame on you VS.

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  37. I agree, and have a very simple principle to add – children should be allowed to be children.
    Middle school aged kids, no matter how much they may protest, are still children and should not be robbed of that time by a corporation telling them it’s time to grow up AND that being grown up = being sultry.
    Notice I said sultry and not sexy – as my husband always says, what makes a woman sexy is her confidence, how she projects herself, and the kind of treatment she expects of herself – all things one learns with time and a healthy dose of self-worth. Sultry, in this day and age, is that idealized body image and style that leaves nothing to the imagination and everything up for grabs.
    As a mature, sexy woman I will absolutely boycott Victoria’s Secret if they decide to go on with this outrageous business model/product line. It shows how little respect they actually have for their customers. I hope that others will join me in this protest.

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